This comment by Richard Grant Muir on the post 7 Unrealistic Expectations Women Have That Men Will Never Live Up To
Physical attractiveness is a component of a person, money is NOT. The author pointed out that beauty is a part of a person, so of course that is something he likes, but he ALSO says that beauty is by no means everything. So loving ALL of a [person] means that beauty will naturally be a part of what he loves. This is meant as reassurance that it is not the only thing he cares about. Almost no human on Earth can claim that physical attractiveness doesn’t matter to them at all.
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Food for Thought:
Maybe generalizing stereotypes is not the best path for happiness. If you follow the golden rules of respect, consideration, love and friendship, and you are an adult, you don’t need to worry about realistic or unrealistic expectations.
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Thanks for this. Refreshing to hear especially considering the norm seems to still be man pays (kind of the manhood tax, if you will (https://goodmenproject.com/dating-2/cc-time-to-abolish-the-antiquated-manhood-tax/).
Hope you like the piece
I don’t have a lot of spare money, and I’m really ok with being poor together with someone else who doesn’t have a lot of money. Especially if it someone who values having a positve role in society over making a lot of money. That’s where I’m at in my current relationship and it’s totally cool. We find creative ways to have fun that don’t involve blowing a lot of cash. I’ve dated wealthy men. Didn’t make the relationship any better or happier. In fact, sometimes it just felt like it was justification for them to be more controlling in… Read more »
There is a difference between being attracted to the person, looks, personality etc. and wanting to be funded. If men and women are equal, and I think they are, they need to start behaving like that. Putting the financial burden on men creates ugly inequality and destructive expectations on both sides that are bad for relationships lasting and being healthy. This is not a tit-for-tat but about balance between couples. It all starts with equality as the foundation and then goes from there.
For me, it’s not a matter of physical attractiveness not mattering. We all want to be physically attractive to our partners. What gets me is the expectations that have become normalized about how women should look to please men that I think are worrisome. But I do think money can very much be a component of what makes a person attractive. Men are always talking about how they are “hard wired” to treat and interact with women in certain ways. Well, women are hard wired to find men that will be good providers and share their resources with her attractive.… Read more »
The problem with your logic Erin is that BOTH sexes are “hardwired” to look for attractive mates; symmetry is indicative of genetic health, and is synonymous with beauty in virtually all cultures. You cannot claim that women do not do this; so trying to say that women look for “good providers” because men look for genetically superior mates is ridiculous. That is essentially saying “Well, if men are genetically predisposed to looking for healthy mates, women are going to do that AND find a man that makes a ton of money!”. It’s logically inconsistent. Plus, please be aware that no… Read more »