This is a comment by Tom B on the post “I Thought You Were Like a Ken Doll“.
“Daniel, the conversation these ladies engaged in with you was so wrong on many levels. Although it wasn’t my first thought when I read the article, I have to wonder how it would have been perceived if you were a lone gal and two guys were questioning you?
“Funny that your article falls on the heel of another article about men struggling with intimacy. Perhaps your views, in the eyes of some women, would represent an inability to be intimate? Men, according to some women are supposed to act like XYZ to be intimate? NOT!
“That being said … good for you! You’re not alone on the idea of waiting. I was a virgin when I got married and I’ve been married for 38 years. There seems to be a stigma that goes with being a virgin and I don’t understand why it’s okay to place labels on virgins? How often do we read on TGMP that men have to be okay with stepping up and out in the light about who they are and feel comfortable with who they are as a man? Yet when a dude admits to his virginity, something must be wrong with him? Why? Because he doesn’t fit into that societal norm that all men think about is sex? Then many go the way of ‘you see sex as bad because of your upbringing?’ Wow.
“I may suggest that turn the tables on these women and be proud of your position but then again we’re taught not to judge others. If you did turn the table and ask them about their sex lives, you’d be looked at as a judgmental ass wipe and who are you to judge them?
“Hang in there Daniel, you sound like the kind of guy my daughter married. You’ll make some father a good son-in-law.”
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Photo credit: Flickr / AN HONORABLE GERMAN
I don’t know, but I wish they wouldn’t.
I can’t stand when people act like this, like there’s something wrong with virgins. Really? Because they don’t take any chance they have to get sex (often meaningless) there’s something wrong with them? I hate how men act like sex is the ultimate goal, and anyone that doesn’t share the view is not a real man.
Why when a dude admits to his virginity do people think there’s something wrong? It depends on the age of the person. If this male person is a teen, people will not necessarily think there is anything wrong. If he is in his twenties, people think the poor dear is stunted or inhibited. If he gets older and is still a virgin, then people think there is something seriously and irreparably wrong. Copulation is considered some kind of routine and inevitable action performed during one’s life. People think that the opportunity must present itself at some point in a young… Read more »