“WRT boys’ emotional states. To avoid stereotyping and misandry, we’d have to assert that boys and girls have not only the same number of emotional states, they have exactly the same ones and in the same proportions. Anybody got anything empirical on that?”
I can see what you’re trying to do, except it fails miserably. Mad, Sad, Happy are what they tend to feel? Fear, jealousy, impatience, excitement, curiosity, anxiety, love, compassion, affectionate, all states that even young boys have. Tom’s description limited them to feeling a lesser variety of emotions and paints the female gender in such a way that it really sounds like they’re far more varied in their emotions, have far more of them.
I’m sorry but on the average, I find it a total crock of %*#). I distinctly remember a very wide range of emotions of both sexes throughout my childhood, and see it in other boys and men today. Continuing this whole women have far more emotional states bullshit simply reinforces the macho bullshit of boys don’t cry, it’s extremely easy to understand the link. Boys are expected to bury their emotions, if we continue beating out that both genders are very different in their emotional response to the point of thinking men have a very limited ranged of emotions compared to women it simply keeps that silly idea going on.
There’s a reason people get happy, sad, or mad….it’s OTHER emotional states feeding into it. What makes you sad? Pain, fear, jealousy, envy, What makes you mad? pain, fear, jealousy, What makes you happy? Fulfillment, love, affection, care, excitement, accomplishing goals, and other positive interactions. It’s about time people started opening their mind and getting in touch with their emotions and actually trying to UNDERSTAND THEM.
Tl:Dr, continuing to teach generalizations that are incorrect contributes to stifling the emotional development of our boys and men. This site is filled with stories of men who are directly harmed by this restricted thinking of male emotions. It’s really an easy concept to understand.
Photo credit: Flickr / Creative Donkey