Dating a shy woman is not like dating any other woman. For instance, most guys might find a woman that is sexy, over-confident or totally not into them. However, the shy woman is in a class all by herself. She is bashful and yet to some she may appear as though he is self-centered or aloof. She tends to be a loner, but that is only because she doesn’t possess the confidence her over-confident female counterpart possesses.
If you’re dating a shy woman, that’s a miracle all on its own because shy women tend to be single, and not because they want to be, but again because they don’t possess the social skills it takes to talk to a man they like. They don’t tend to be good conversationalist nor are they good at sharing their feelings, thoughts or emotions.
However, before you throw in the towel and give up on this seemingly withdrawn individual, there is hope. In fact, all it takes is a few dating tips for men who date shy women to get you off to a great start. Shy women are human beings, just like you. Therefore all it takes is a few techniques that will help you and your shy woman take your relationship to the next level. And, don’t worry you won’t have to do all the work. All you will need are these 5 things:
The most important quality you can exhibit when dating a shy woman is patience. Shy women are like anyone else. They have wants, needs, and desires. The difference with shy women is they have a hard time articulating what their needs are. Consequently, it’s up to you to be patient while they find a way to articulate their needs. And, don’t worry, in time they will open up. The thing with shy women is they lack confidence, and in most cases that stems from a lack of trust. Therefore, once you have proven that you can be trusted, she will begin to open up. Just be patient and enjoy the dating process.
The next thing you can do when dating a shy woman is to listen. Listen to everything she says, particularly because in the beginning a shy woman may not do too much talking. And, again, it isn’t because she doesn’t have anything to say, but more so, she is waiting to see how you respond to what she does say. If you respond positively, and I don’t mean agreeing with everything she says, but more so, responding with a positive disposition.
You have a right to your own thoughts and opinions. However, there is a right way to respond to someone’s feelings and thoughts, and then there is an absolute wrong way. For instance: If your shy woman begins to open up about her previous partner, perhaps sharing how she thought she talked too much. Don’t respond with something negative like well, that’s because you don’t talk at ALL. Instead, you might say something like: In a relationship, I can appreciate why communication is important, and then thank her for sharing. You do not have to go into any more details than that. In fact, if you respond with something that offers no opinion one way or another it might force her to open up a bit more.
Perhaps she is telling you that her ex talked too much because she wants to see if you think she talks too little. Perhaps her ex and she used to get into big debates as to why she didn’t talk enough. Whatever the case, it’s important to listen to what’s being said, and what’s not being said. In relationships, many of us are passive listeners, waiting our turn to speak, rather than listening to what’s being said. However, we can learn a lot from simply listening.
Meet Them Halfway
When dating a shy woman, it is important you do not do all of the work; otherwise, you leave no room to meet your shy woman halfway. Relationships are about give and take. If you give more than what you are getting, you will resent her and perhaps lash out, thus not allowing your shy woman to come your way. On the other hand, if you act too lax she might perceive you as uninterested. The key is reciprocity. The more she gives, you give. The less she gives, you give, but not as much as you would give when she is giving. Got it?
I hope so because this isn’t rocket science. And, while it might seem like a lot of work, it is no more work than any other relationship. It’s about learning to speak someone’s love language. You would have to do the same amount of work if you were dating an over-zealous woman.
Give Them Options
Since shy women do not always like to open up or rather they have a hard time opening up, giving them options is a great way to learn more about them. However, in this process, it’s important to provide them with options that you would essentially appreciate too. For instance, if you want to hang out with your shy woman on Friday night, you might say something like: I’d love to hang out on Friday, are you up for dinner, a movie or both dinner and a movie? However, you wouldn’t ask her if she wants to go watch a ball game or go out to a pub if you know that isn’t something she wants to do. The key is giving her lots of options to choose from, but not so many that it overwhelms and not so little that she feels cornered. Three to four options should suffice. And be sure to praise her or reward her with a kiss or a heartfelt thank you for making a choice. Your positive reinforcements will get her to open up more. You can also ask her what she thought about dinner or the movie, whichever she decided. By allowing her to share her ideas, you might learn that she enjoys dramas and sushi over chick-flicks and fast food.
Accept Them For Who They Are
The last and final thing you can do when dating a shy woman is to accept her for who she is. Do not; I repeat, DO NOT, try to change your shy woman. There is nothing wrong with her. It just takes her longer to open up and reveal who she is. If you don’t try to change her or rush the process of getting to know her, what you will find is perhaps a really nice woman.