Every once in awhile people ask me where I get “insight” on women and relationships. I don’t consider myself particularly ‘enlightened’ nor excessively more educated on women than the next guy, but there is one thing that I have always had a habit of doing…
Listening.
I enjoy communicating, having in-depth conversations, learning about people, observing. I think these are really the best ways to learn the realities of relationships and of each human being as an individual – and – to spot trends that can be used as learning experiences.
I have men tell me all the time that women don’t want to be approached. They are always mean or rude or just generally ignore others. So, naturally, I decided to go to the source.
I asked women if they were open to being approached by men in public.
The overwhelming majority said yes. There were a couple of threats of violence and “don’t fucking talk to me in public” answers, but that’s to be expected.
For the most part, women seem to be generally open to being approached – as long as you’re not creepy about it.
The interesting thing about this new little tidbit of information, is that it goes against everything men typically feel about women these days. That they’re unapproachable, disconnected, rude, et cetera.
Maybe, just maybe, the problem could be your approach.
Eventually we have to look in the mirror and see the forest through the trees. There are (literally) hundreds of women flat out saying they are open to being approached by men – what more proof do you need?
So, guys, I challenge you: Go out today, smile at a woman, and say hello. Don’t ask for her number, don’t be weird, don’t scream it out of your car window or sneak up behind her while she’s wearing headphones.
Just make eye contact with someone, and say hi.
The world is missing real, human interaction – and regardless of interpretation, women are real life human beings who are missing these interactions just as much as anyone else.
We need to have open and honest communication about these issues, and I think this is a pretty damn good start.
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This post originally appeared on James M. Sama’s website.
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Photo: Getty Images