Believe it or not, there are people out there who support women while sticking up for men. Christopher Anderson lists 21 of them.
EDIT – 3/13/15 – I’ve been greatly impressed by the conversation in the comments below.
I invite readers to add names of other advocates in the discussion below.
This is only a partial list of people that I look up to, and not meant to be definitive. -CMA
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Recently, there have been a number of exposes on the Men’s Rights’ Movement in prominent online media outlets. Vox, Buzzfeed, and Mother Jones have all run major investigative pieces on the Men’s Rights Movement and its figureheads Warren Farrell and Paul Elam. The rhetoric of the MRM’s—often filled with rage, calls for violence, and a sense that men and masculinity are under attack—has generated a significant amount of attention and criticism. However while the MRM and its loudest voices may have stolen the spotlight for the moment, it is important to stress that they are not the only people or even representative of people who do real to work to address the challenges faced by boys and men in this country and elsewhere.
As a survivor and an advocate for other survivors of sexual violence, I have had the privilege and honor to meet with and work alongside some of the most dedicated, generous, and passionate advocates who are truly doing groundbreaking work to help us better understand and support boys and men. I compiled this partial list of some of my favorite people working to help improve the lives of men in order to show that there are many more people working on these issues than many people might realize.
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Jeff Anderson—Jeff (no relation to the author) is a plaintiff’s attorney whose law firm has been a pioneer in working with survivors of clergy abuse.
Zainab Bangura—Ms. Bangura was appointed as the United Nations Secretary-General’s Special Representative on Sexual Violence in Conflict. In that role she has been a passionate advocate for survivors of rape in conflict zones, and has made a particular focus on raising awareness and resources for male victims of wartime sexual violence.
Matt Burton—A courageous survivor of multiple forms of abuse who has been tirelessly working to help advance knowledge of the unique challenges men who have lived through trauma face.
Dr. Howard Fradkin, Sharon Imperato, Lynne MacDonell, and Jim Struve—These four clinicians are the leadership team for MaleSurvivor’s Weekends of Recovery. They oversee a team of over a dozen mental health professionals who donate over 10,000 hours of time a year to organize and have organized more than 60 healing retreats for over 1,000 male survivors of sexual abuse.
Dr. Bryana French—Dr. French’s primary research interests focus on sexual coercion and associated psychosocial outcomes among racially diverse young men and women. Last year, she released data showing that 43% of the HS and college ages males she interviewed reported being sexually coerced.
Dan Griffin—Dan has worked in the mental health and addictions field for over two decades. His work acknowledges the unique challenges men face, as he says: “We can’t just change what men think, we have to change what we think about men.”
William Kellibrew IV— is an international advocate for civil, human, women, children, and victims’ rights. He survived extreme sexual and domestic violence as a child to become and authority on issues related to trauma and recovery, trauma-informed care, and poly-victimization.
Dr. Michael Kimmell—A professor at Stony Brook University, Kimmel has been working to create one of the first men’s studies programs in the US. His writings focus on highlighting the challenges modern men face.
David Pisarra—David is an attorney who’s practice focuses on supporting men father’s and men’s rights. While you might jump to the conclusion that he would be a rabid MRM supporter, you would be wrong. David strives to protect the rights of his clients without demonizing women or feminism in general.
Wizdom Powell—Dr. Powell’s research investigates the contribution of gender (e.g., social constructions of masculinity), intergenerational transmission, socioeconomic status, socio-environmental processes (e.g., racial discrimination), health-related attitudes (e.g., medical mistrust), and behavior to African American men’s mental and physical health status.
Richard Propes—Richard is a paraplegic/double amputee born with spina bifida and a survivor of abuse as well. Through his Tenderness Tour, Richard continues to hit the road and has traveled approximately 3,500 miles by wheelchair since 1989 to raise awareness of child abuse and abuse of persons with disabilities.
Matt Sandusky—Adopted son of convicted serial child molester Jerry Sandusky, Matt made national headlines last year sharing his story in a nationally televised interview with Oprah Winfrey. With his nonprofit organization, Peaceful Hearts, Matt is hoping to encourage more survivors to find the support and healing they need.
Dr. Ritch Savin-Williams—Ritch is a professor of developmental psychology at Cornell University who specializes in gay, lesbian, and bisexual research. He is the first people to study the experiences of gay youth and perhaps the first one to not assume they are inherently broken.
Dr. Andrew Solomon—Andrew is a writer and lecturer on psychology, politics, and the arts; winner of the National Book Award; and an activist in LGBT rights, mental health, and the arts. In his powerful 2014 TED talk, already viewed over 2 million times, he recounts some of the adverse experiences of his childhood.
Lara Stemple—Lara is the director of the Health and Human Rights Law Project at UCLA Law School, and has been a champion of male victims since she was the Executive Director of Just Detention, a prisoners’ rights organization. Her research shows that federal surveys detect a high prevalence of sexual victimization among men—in many circumstances similar to the prevalence found among women
Manny Waks—Manny is a public advocate against child sexual abuse, especially within the Jewish community. His recent testimony about the sexual abuse he experienced as a Yeshiva student to Australia’s Royal Commission into Institutional Child Sexual Abuse has garnered worldwide attention.
Daphne Watkins—Dr. Watkins studies the influence of gender role socialization on health status over the adult life course for underserved groups using mixed methods. She is the first woman and person of color to be elected the president of the American Men’s Studies Association.
Victor Vieth—Victor is a former child abuse prosecutor who left to form the National Child Protection Training Center and is one of the world’s leading experts in child abuse prevention.
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These are only a small handful of the people who are engaged in work to address the very real challenges faced by men and boys in our culture. I could easily name dozens more wonderful people whose work inspires me. I hope by sharing their names we can begin to reclaim the work of advocating for men and boys away from those who do so at the expense of women, or those who feel that the only way to help men is to train them to be something different than they are.
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Photo—55Laney69/Flickr
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With all this being said, may I ask what where are all the men and boys shelters? I’m looking for something to hold onto here. Something that’s showing me that there area headway’s being made on behalf of men. Any new studies? Any help from the government? C’mon, throw me a bone.
Tom here’s one that just broke ground in my area recently. So sad that in 2015 the first all-male home for sex-trafficked boys is just breaking ground.
But it is a start and that’s a good thing.
http://m.wcti12.com/news/ground-broken-on-nations-first-home-for-sextrafficked-boys/31138992
VERY happy to see that!
Given all your criterion I’m not sure Jeffery M. Leving should be on the list. Growing up in Chicago I was witness to the birth of the father’s rights movement, which is part of the MRM, but is now so main stream that many people fear associating it with it’s MRM roots. He’s done a lot for men, but I also know that he took on many “women’s” advocates. A lot of the things he advocated like criminalizing visitation interference were seen as anti-women. Now it’s the main stream view in society and anyone claiming mothers should be able to… Read more »
Try Glenn Poole and probably Ally Fogg as well. I’d be weary about trusting many of the online “investigations” of the MRM. Nearly every article I’ve seen on it will conflate Redpillers and pickup artists with the men’s right crowd (redpillers hate MRA’s and I haven’t seen any love of the PUA’s in the MRA crowd either), and assume Elliott Rodgers liked the MRM when he wasn’t apart of the men’s rights movement what so ever, the only link was watching PUA material and if I remember correctly he was against PUA’s for failing him anyway. The trouble with trying… Read more »
I’m no fan of Elam’s ‘Over the Top’ style either Archy, but his points are usually accurate. His delivery style sort of reminds me of Amanda Marcotte, but you never see her ‘Taken to Task’ for it (at least by feminist). All that being said, if you look at AVFM’s page, you’ll notice that about 1/2 the featured writers are women. Many who’ve contributed articles here.
Soo many people just do NOT want men’s groups to exist, on campuses there are a lot of efforts made to shut them down or halt progression for fear of what they might become. This. Death threats against a men’s conference in an age when a feminists can get on the front page of mainstream media everytime she receives a threat. Changing rules on organizations for the specific purpose of blocking the forming of men’s groups on campus. Going through logical loops to tie extreme MRAs like AVFM to each and every pro men’s idea, thought, and effort that is… Read more »
I wish there was a “thumbs up” here because you would get one Danny
Danny, Perhaps I should have been clearer about this in my piece. I DON’T think that MRA’s are THE problem. I think that the problem (or at least one of them) is that a select handful of MRA leaders have become the focus of virtually all the attention that is currently being given to the work of advocating for men and boys. IF anything Buzzfeed, Vox, MJ, and other outlets that play this narrative over and over and over again are just as much to blame for the lack of progress in men’s movements as the toxic statements of people… Read more »
Perhaps I should have been clearer about this in my piece. I DON’T think that MRA’s are THE problem. I think that the problem (or at least one of them) is that a select handful of MRA leaders have become the focus of virtually all the attention that is currently being given to the work of advocating for men and boys. I can agree with this but it wears thin when MRAs descend to the level of an omnipresent boogeyman that is literally never mentioned unless its time to blame someone for why something is wrong. And this mentality is… Read more »
While I have no particular love of Paul Elam, I think it is rather sad to see Michael Kimmel cited as someone who advocates for men and boys. He actively dismisses the notion that men and boys can be victims of physical and sexual violence, that women can be abusers, and argues that males claiming to be victims are actually abusers. There are others on the list with a history of doing the same. It is sad to see someone from an organization I respect supporting people with such views. That said, I think people like Glenn Sacks and Jan… Read more »
Jacob,
Thanks for your comments. Would you be willing to share with me specific examples of where Kimmel argues that men and boys can’t be victims of physical and sexual violence. If indeed he has those views, I would certainly revisit my choice to include him in this piece.
I’m glad that you mentioned Sacks and Brown. There is no shortage of other people I could have included, and I hope that others will take the opportunity to share other people they feel should be added to this list in the comments.
Kimmel wrote a paper titled “Gender Symmetry” in Domestic Violence. Of particular note are pages 13 to 15 and 23 to 26. Kimmel argues that men over-report being victims of abuse, women who commit abuse are acting in self-defense, men who are victims are less traumatized by the assaults, and that advocates for male survivors want to silence women.
Thanks Jacob for sharing this with me. I’ll look into it.
“Dr. Watkins studies the influence of gender role socialization on health status over the adult life course for underserved groups using mixed methods. She is the first woman and person of color to be elected the president of the American Men’s Studies Association.” What would say if a man was elected as president of a feminist organization? Would that be acceptable? Also, the program the center at Stony Brook has/had on its board of directors the following people “Gloria Steinem, Martin Duberman, Jane Fonda, Eve Ensler, Carol Gilligan, James Gilligan, Frank Ochberg, Gov. Madeleine Kunin (Vermont), Catharine Stimpson and Hampden-Sydney… Read more »
Hi spoonwood, Thanks for your comments. My proposal to the upcoming AMSA conference was accepted and I am speaking on a panel focussing on male experiences of trauma. I will also say that I had no prior contact to Kimmel or the center at Stony Brook prior to submitting my proposal to the conference, and didn’t lobby in any way for my proposal to be accepted. I certainly wouldn’t try to make any guesses as to whether or not a proposal such as you suggest would or wouldn’t be accepted. But I think that there are ways to approach Father’s… Read more »
Yeah, Men’s Studies programs with cirriculum established by Feminist? Somehow the phrase ‘Re-education Camps’ keeps popping into my head.
Danny, thanks for your comment.
I think we are judged by both our actions and by the company we keep. As far as I’m concerned Farrell cashed in any legitimate claim to being a helpful advocate for boys and men’s issues by publicly embracing and endorsing Elam in the way that he has. It’s a shame because there might well have been things Farrell could have done that might have helped to bridge this divide much earlier on.
Farrell tried bridging the divide years ago, with feminists in fact, and look where that got him. At this point its not even what people say and what they do and why they think its about ideology and sides. That’s why we are at a point where valid criticisms of people you list here are ignored while invalid criticisms of people that have already been deemed as bad are allowed to stand. He’s no more perfect than the people you list here but it seems that Elam is being used as a scape goat to avoid acknowledge the valid things… Read more »
@ Danny Even Elam isn’t as bad as people want to make him out to be. I remember reading a comment were someone pointed to an article he wrote where he supposedly said that if he were on a jury, he would never vote to convict a defendant of rape even if he believed him guilty. Of course, that’s not what he actually said He said that because of past prosecurial malfeasance, he didn’t feel he could trust the evidence they presented so he wouldn’t vote to convict even if the evidence presented precluded reasonable doubt. In practical terms, it… Read more »
“Of course, that’s not what he actually said He said that because of past prosecurial malfeasance, he didn’t feel he could trust the evidence they presented so he wouldn’t vote to convict even if the evidence presented precluded reasonable doubt.”
He TOTALLY said that even if all proof leads to the conclusion the guy is a rapist, he would still not vote to convict him. He keeps calling women whores and sluts all around. He is just a hateful misogynistic prick. Elam is a total idiot.
I’m not suprised the good men around here don’t find him THAT BAD, though.
@ Lolabunny
“He TOTALLY said that even if all proof leads to the conclusion the guy is a rapist, he would still not vote to convict him.”
Because he didn’t trust the proof.
“I’m not suprised the good men around here don’t find him THAT BAD, though.”
Because DNA testing is a tool of the patriarchy.
Sounds like Marcotte and her declaration that those three Lacrosse players most certainly did rape Crystal Mangum even after it because clear that she told multiple versions of events all of which were disproven by her own friend who was there with her that night. Yes all the evidence pointed to them not being guilty yet feminists still decided they were guilty. Now as for what I think about Elam he’s a mixed bag at best. There are horrible things like what you say and there are also things like last year when AVFM did a series of posts on… Read more »
fun fact- Warren Farrell was chairman of New York NOW for a few years in the early 70s.
Hi Chris, first I’d like to say thanks for a wonderful article. I think it gives people hope especially men, but certainly also the women who care for them and care for people in general that men’s issues are and will be addressed. I do want to clarify many points. There is a distinction between between directly helping men and creating an environment (structures, legal processes, equality of resource allocation, etc.) that provides help for men and boys. Earl Silverman (a self identified MRA) started a shelter for abused men in Canada. The shelter closed because the government refused to… Read more »
You make a lot of great points John. Re: helping men/creating environment I fully agree that there is a significant difference between providing direct services and addressing the issues from a cultural perspective. Interestingly, MaleSurvivor has been trying to do both, in large part because so few resources for male victims exist, it was felt early on in our history by some of the early leaders and founders that we couldn’t do one without the other. That’s been a distinct advantage in some ways, and a profound limitation in others. RE: consent : With regards to who has ownership of… Read more »
Gonna have to disagree with those supposed investigative pieces on Farrell. They are pretty much hatchet jobs meant to cloud the issue and smear him.
Christopher: I must take exception to you lumping Warren Farrell in with the worst of the MRA’s, or to referring to dishonest hatchet jobs by places like Buzzfeed. Buzzfeed? Quoted as a legitimate source of fair criticism? Are you joking? I’ve known Warren for over twenty years, read his books, attended his workshops. He tells hard truths, but I have NEVER read or heard him say anything that led me to think he is a misogynist, and to label him as such merely betrays your ignorance of his work. One of the filthier tactics of extreme feminists is to smear… Read more »
Scott, Thank you for your comment. Re: Farrell – As I said in my comment below to Danny, I believe that Warren gave up any credibility he has as a positive voice for change by embracing Elam as he has done. And if you think I’m catering to extremist feminists in saying that you have no idea who I am or what I stand for. To the best of my knowledge Farrell has never publicly endorsed the work of MaleSurvivor (we’ve been around for 20 years, mind you, so there’s been plenty of time to do so) or any other… Read more »
Christopher, I’m sorry but I have to agree with Scott re: your condemnation of Dr Farrell – I haven’t met him admittedly, but have read most of his books and have only ever found his arguments to be cogent and thoughtfully presented. Yes, he tells us of the ‘inconvenient truths’ of feminism but that in no way, in my opinion at least, makes him a misogynist. Hating women (the actual dictionary definition of misogyny), and hating feminists are two entirely seperate things! Oh, and you seem to have left Erin Pizzey off your list – she set up the first… Read more »
Hello Ratty, Thank you for your comment. I appreciate that people have different opinions re: Farrell than I do, and as I said to Scott, I’m more than happy to engage him in dialogue. It’s not my intention to try and convince the world that Farrell is a bad person. This is my opinion, and certainly not intended to be taken as anything else but. Also, as I said in another comment, I truly hope that other people will add to the list in these comments. I am an advocate primarily for male survivors of sexual abuse. As such, this… Read more »
Let me clarify, I just realize that my wording above is unclear. it is not my opinion that Warren is a bad person. I meant to say my thoughts about his embracing Elam being a bad idea are my opinion.
I don’t know about Kimmell. He seems to think that many males are stuck in adolescence simply because they don’t settle down and marry. A better choice would be Helen Smith who wrote Men On Strike.
Thanks for your comment Wes. I think that Kimmell’s work, and frankly the work of everyone on this list, is open to critique. Noone is going to be a perfect advocate. That said, my point here is really to highlight advocates who have a primary focus on some area of male issues and who are not in any way (to my knowledge) anti-feminist or a supporter of the more toxic vitriol that some (and I stress SOME) in the MRM spout.