It’s Time to Stop Blaming and Start Reclaiming: Reclaim the FUN of Your Family DysFUNction.
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A DysFUNctional Manifesto
Dysfunction can be so serious, this a declaration of the importance of reclaiming the fun of DysFUNction. This is a manifesto of joy rather than a manual of recovery.
There is Dysfunctional and there is DysFUNctional
Some families can be dysfunctional and that is destructive. A DysFUNctional family accepts it’s craziness and learns to love each other. Acceptance flows like the ketchup on our Kraft dinner. We are not always pretty, we wear pajamas and slippers, and we can go days without showers. We have learned to love the differences in each other and how we are stronger because of each person.
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Eight Ways to Reclaim Family DysFUNction
1.Addiction to drugs or alcohol is not our thing. Okay, sometimes we binge watch the Walking Dead, we can use the internet too much or spend too much time on our cell phones. But let’s admit it; cell phones are so cool!
- DysFUNctional families sometimes over do things and get side tracked. We admit it and get back to what we are all about.
2. Control is not as big an issue since Darth Vader went back to Rehab. Now, we each take turns with the remote control. We don’t all wear the same stuff or listen to the same music. Sometimes just for fun, we even wear nail polish that matches our light sabers.
- Freedom to live outside of the Vader box is a hallmark of a DysFUNctional family. We rock the freedom by changing it up and being flexible whenever we can.
3. Unpredictability can be a gift. Admit it. Some families can be over-structured. Sometimes it is more fun to go with the flow. We don’t communicate our plans because sometimes we genuinely have no idea what to have for supper or what to do on the weekend.
- DysFUNctional families learn to love a little creative chaos. Our favorite Saint is Saint Jude, The Patron Saint of Lost Causes (see video by Florence and the Machine).
4. Conflict happens sometimes. Some families don’t talk and other families talk too much. We talk while we are eating because it is more fun that way.
- DysFUNctional families are unique because of our imperfections and the ways that we love each other.
Being together is unpredictable and a little insane, but we love each other and make our DysFUNction work for us.
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- Weirdness happens when dad experiments with supper, so now he uses the cookbook mom gave him.
6. Perfectionism is helpful and we keep it contained to the living room so that at least the guests are impressed. We are a little messy, so go ahead and sue us. We admit that we are powerless over our messiness and we surrender to our Higher Power, the Dyson vacuum.
- Being DysFUNctional, we have learned to appreciate each other’s strengths and the value of having a clean room once in a while. We see the gifts that creative mess can give.
7. Poor Communication – Okay, sometimes our communication sucks. We accept it. The US Government has a communications team that issues a press release every time their communication sucks. When we realized that it is okay for the US government to have communication issues, we finally accepted ourselves and gave each other some slack. Wants and needs are written on lists: The Christmas list, the grocery list, the Saturday project list, the Chore list and the Dad-don’t-forget-list.
- In a DysFUNctional family, self expression is encouraged but door slamming is not okay. We talk or we go for a walk.
8. Diversity – Our family is a university of diversity. We give space and celebrate dad’s weird sense of humor and his hats of many colors. We enjoy mom’s cooking and how she is trying to expand our range of foods so that we are more inclusive. We celebrate our son’s love of heavy metal music and our daughter’s laser beam glares and her creative genius. It’s slow, but we are getting it.
- DysFUNctional families have unique interests and needs. We talk about our needs and sometimes we disagree, but we love each other.
If you can identify with the DysFUNctional Manifesto, you need to read The 12 Steps of Taking Ourselves Less Seriously. You also should share this post and sign up for the blog so that you don’t miss the awesomeness.
Keep It Real
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Photos by Shira Gal, OakleyOriniginals