Glenn has observed what is important to his little daughter. He is ready to man up and give it to her. He hopes he has change for a tip.
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What they don’t realize is this is bonding with your daughter and building a long term relationship you will have with her. One of give and take. A relationship built around her needs not mine. While I understand having common hobbies and interest with my son might be easier and more socially acceptable does that mean I should short change my daughter? I play video games with my son, age nine, and we bond and talk all the time about his friends, school, life as we play. As a dad we need to make that same efforts with our daughters. I’m not saying that she won’t play video games one day but why should I wait for her to enjoy my hobbies? Right now she is loving painting her little toenails and what harm does it cause for me to have pink nails? Well other than my color is more purple than pink. I did end up washing off the color on my fingernails at work but my toes are still pink and she checks them everyday. Yesterday she had to “fix a broken nails,” as she said because one chipped. So once again we sit down and she touches up my toes and we go on to play with her kitchen. I showed her I valued her and what is important to her. Pink toes mean more to me than what comments I might get about my toes.
Lets fast forward 11 years when I have a teenage daughter. When she is struggling to understand what is happening to her, around her, and trying to become an adult. I honestly believe pink toes now will result in a relationship with my daughter that will result in an open conversation between us as I have demonstrated to her I value her for who she is. How much easier will her life be when she feels comfortable asking me questions about school, her body, and yes even sex? I would much rather get a mani-pedi with my daughter at 13 and have her talking to me about these things as the alternative is frightening to me. I don’t want to hear, “But dad you don’t know me,” will I regret not having pink toes for a while? Am I prepared to take a backseat in my daughter’s life for a while?
It is very important to me that my daughter sees me as a strong man. What I need to remember is strength in a man goes far beyond flexing muscles and thumping chests. I’ve never heard a dad, as they walk their daughter down the aisle, say “Man I wish I would have spent a little more time on my fantasy football league.” More times than not they regret not spending more time with her. I challenge all the dad’s of daughters out there to pick up a bottle of nail polish after work and surprise your daughter with an impromptu pedicure. Trust me you will never be happier to have pink toes in your life.
Photo: Flickr/Matt Ballentine
If men want equal rights in the custody courts, quit acting like every damn mundane parenting thing they do is soooooooooo adorable and wonderful! We’ll just wait for your “Mom throws a football and crawls around like a dinosaur” article. Oh, squee! A father learned how to wrap a rubber band around a clump of hair! He’s such a great daddy!!!!! Oh, mom figured out how to tie a Windsor knot for her son’s tie? Oh, how terribly tragic….
Isn’t it odd that pink toenails on a guy should require any explanation at all about how it is in part a supremely fun way to bond with your daughters because you’re focising on tje things they might like? Jeez. It’s only a bit of color on a body so why should that be that big of a deal? I don’t get it. Paint away dad and know you’re creating fun memories with your kids
I agree, Mark. This post comes across as being all about a dads insecurity stepping even a little bit outside gender norms (“it’s very important to me that my daughter sees me as a strong man” etc) , and really not very much about his daughter. Really. If your daughter like to play games that involve painting nails, go for it. If you don’t like painted nails, it’s an opportunity to talk about personal boundaries. Either way, bonding will happen *if you are present*. Being there, giving her your attention, not the pink nails, it what creates bonding. Me, I’ve… Read more »
I have two daughters 4 and 6 years old, and I know that my close relationship with them has a lot to do with me being up for painted nails, kiddie make-up on my face, bows in my hair, wearing jewelry, getting dressed up, etc. I grew up in a very male-dominated, military style home but I realized as an adult that true men don’t worry about others’ perceptions. Be your own man and don’t be afraid to show your daughters that real men can play dress-up without being emasculated. I’m very happy I have (and continue to) engaged with… Read more »