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Hey, friend-reading-this! I have a new baby. My second (if you don’t count my dogs). Her name is Octavia. And thank you, in advance, for the kind words. Now, with that out of the way, let’s to get the subject at hand . . .
Basic project management techniques can help when it comes to dealing with a newborn. Whether you are an entry-level dad or an experienced father of 5, there is always something you can do to make your life a little easier.
1: Taking control of the Situation
I have always found myself distant from my children in the beginning, and I have always believed that it is because babies develop inside their mothers, and not their fathers. Now, I have to first admit that I do not envy my wife, since that experience seemed god-awful, but she does enjoy a closer bond in the beginning. My way of getting around it? Project definition and planning.
By formulating a project scope and specs rearing this 2nd time baby required, not only was I able to quantify each necessary task, I also managed to ensure that I remained involved throughout the antenatal and neonatal process. From how many diapers can required to what moments require a “photo-op”, from ensuring your boss is aware of the coming child to whether you’d need some formula to supplement nursing, all can be planned in advance. This allows the panicky father (which was me with my first child) to become somewhat competent.
2. Preventing (Postponing) Burnouts
You will burn out. There is no preventing it. All you can do is postpone it, and hope you and your partner do not burnout at the same time. With that out of the way, how can project management techniques help? The answer is deceptively simple: division of labor. For me, I prefer the RACI matrix (Responsibility, Accountability, Consult, & Inform). Basically, for each task, you assign someone (preferably a single person) to be responsible, accountable, available for questions, and have to inform.
To apply this technique, first, check the list of how much you have resources at your disposal in working hours and the techniques they have. In my case, I responsible for “sleeping duty” (what this means is because I have no discernible fatherhood skills aside from being a little chubby, I am a good bed and the tiny Octavia can sleep in comfort). My wife handles feeding because she possesses the equipment (unfortunately untransferable). My mother and our 8-day/hour “postnatal care nurse” helps with my wife’s recovery. Lastly (and thankfully), our lovely domestic helper Ruby does the diapers.
We also work in shifts. I handle late-nights (my college bar-hopping lifestyle has actually helped the current me stay awake quite late, although I must admit mixing Martinis are easier than formula). My mother and Ruby handle the early mornings (thank you for being awesome).
Anyways, it doesn’t matter how the tasks or shifts are divided, JUST MAKE SURE THEY ARE! If you are the one responding to the calls at night, make sure you have a few hours sleep. Research have consistently shone that working without enough rest is detrimental to the task at hand, and when it is your kid on the line, that is not something you should risk
3. Scope Management
I did the unthinkable. 3 days after the birth of Octavia, my eldest daughter, Ophelia, is on a plane to Canada with her grandfather to visit our extended family. This was immediate 50% reduction in scope when it comes to kids screaming at night. While it was a hard decision for all concerned (mostly for my dad who basically just accepted a Herculean task in his retirement to serve as full-time babysitter), it definitely makes the first few weeks easier. Ophelia will only be gone less than a month, but this already makes things dramatically easier.
I won’t recommend pulling this one to everyone (nor does it apply to everyone), but do remember that scope is something that everyone can reduce. Start by cutting the non-essential household tasks. Personally, my dogs (sorry Mead & Morgan) got their walks reduced from 4/week to 2/week, and takeouts are now the norm rather than the exception. We also spent sometime as a family diggout out old clothes so we don’t need to do as much lanundry. Essentially, do anything and everything to reduce the amount of non-baby related work you can.
Closing Thoughts
Babies are hard, regardless of whether its your 1st, 2nd, 3rd etc. And sometimes, we all just grasp at straws. I have found that it is easiest to revert to something I know to make things easier. Having delved into Project Management to help a little, I want to share one last thought, courtersy of Octavia:
Octavia (on the right):
Dad! I am hungry!
Me: Hi Hungry, I’m Dad 🙂
Yes, I understand Linkedin is a business-oriented platform, but for a workholic with a content background on paternity leave, writing about project management in my daily hour of “me time” is relaxing. So thank you for bearing with me.
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This article originally appeared on LinkedIn
Photo courtesy of author