Self-conscious if not usually a word that even remotely describes my daughter, automatically assuming that everybody likes her and finds her adorable. As she has been getting older, however, I’m beginning to notice that other people’s opinions are starting to effect the way that she acts and dresses, something that was as inevitable as it is disappointing.
Specifically, she’s becoming much less likely to wear anything that could be considered “boy clothes.” I hate the idea that this may partially be a reaction to the little boy at the skate park that asked her why she was wearing an Incredible Hulk helmet or her so-called “friend” at school that doesn’t like her Spider-Man sneakers but other than a reminder that the only person that she needs to impress is herself I haven’t pushed. It feels like it would be hypocritical to attempt to encourage her individuality by refusing to acknowledge that her tastes might simply be changing.
That lack of hypocrisy was tested this week as she donned her new puppy dog helmet and we prepared to take our first bike ride of the spring. I had spent the previous day lowering the seat on one of her sister’s old bikes, inflating tires and greasing a chain that hadn’t been used in six or seven years but had neglected to check the condition of my own. Much like its rider, my bike is old, rusty, and has crashed more times than I’d care to admit. It’s still good to go, just needs a little time to get ready.
Alaina wasn’t in the mood to wait. Showing initiative I’d appreciate seeing more of on school mornings, she had a cooler packed with water and was impatiently waiting in the truck, helmet already donned and buckled. Her solution was simple: I would just have to ride mommy’s bike. Mommy’s purple bike.
I was backed into a corner and we both knew it, her smirk telling me that she knew exactly what she was doing.
The fact that manufacturers still even make different bikes for each gender really doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. The slanted or missing middle bar that was originally removed to help keep a girl’s dress from bunching up or revealing a bit of leg while getting on is about seventy years past significance and the carbon fiber materials of modern bicycles decrease the need for any added frame strength that the horizontal bar provides. I certainly didn’t need the extra seat support for the ride that we would be taking.
There was absolutely no reason for me to not ride that bike outside of the fear that little boys might make fun of me. I prepared several witty comebacks just in case, and off we went.
looking “manly”
Nobody said anything of course, something that I think may have been disappointing for her. We had a great day exploring a new trail that we’d come across the weekend prior. Times when she veered in front of me were much less painful without that bar to greet me every time rapid deceleration took me off the front of my seat. I’m not sure if I’m going to make this my new ride but may just go out and get myself a matching puppy dog helmet. Those googly eyes look pretty cool.
—
Previously Published on thirstydaddy.com
—
internal image courtesy of author