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Mental health professionals are working hard to get a handle on the postpartum depression that’s common among new mothers — and rightfully so. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reports that about 11.5 percent of new mothers experience postpartum depressive symptoms.
But relatively little attention has been devoted to the symptoms of depression among new fathers. Medical professionals have yet to compile and synthesize much of the research on this subject, but that doesn’t mean we can’t recognize the warning signs.
Roughly 10 percent of new fathers will experience some degree of postpartum anxiety or depression. They are at the greatest risk of developing these mental health problems during the first six months of fatherhood.
Regardless of gender, the symptoms of postpartum depression are similar: difficulty managing emotions and behavior, trouble interacting with the baby, and feeling overwhelmed and hopeless. It can also present via physical symptoms such as stomachaches, headaches, and insomnia.
In western culture, however, these mental health conditions carry different undertones for fathers. Cultural norms and values have changed enough that society has finally started to shed its established view of fathers as stoic, authoritarian patriarchs. Men are not just hunters anymore; they can be nurturing caretakers who take an active role in raising their children.
Beyond this shifting cultural viewpoint is something equally, if not more, important: children’s mental and emotional health. When one or both parents suffer from postpartum anxiety or depression during a newborn’s first 18 to 24 months, the child is at a greater risk of developing depression or an anxiety disorder.
Fighting Back Against Depression
Although men’s postpartum mental health issues aren’t entirely avoidable, new and expectant fathers can shorten their duration simply by being aware of the symptoms and having important — and difficult — conversations. Here are a few ways to alleviate anxiety among new fathers:
1. Offense is the best defense.
The term “prenatal care” conjures images of vitamins and visits to an obstetrician. But prenatal care should also include discussions of postpartum anxiety and depression. Before a child is born, fathers should talk with partners, obstetricians, and other doctors. These conversations will ensure you’re aware of risk factors and how to recognize, avoid, and minimize these mental health issues.
I was 24 years old when my first child was born. All my friends were in the same boat, becoming new fathers at around the same time. As a result, it was relatively easy to find someone with whom to discuss the myriad challenges of fatherhood.
Today, that’s not the case. Many men aren’t getting married until later in life, and they either have children later in life or not at all. A recent study found that 44 percent of men at age 33 have never been married, and that number is projected to increase to 50 percent.
There’s less societal pressure to abide by a one-size-fits-all path regarding major life events, which is great news. Unfortunately, it also means new fathers are more likely to feel isolated as they navigate fatherhood. If possible, seek out other new dads through mutual friends, online networks, or local groups.
2. Communicate with your partner about expectations.
In addition to talking to your partner about postpartum anxiety and depression, discuss what he or she expects of you as a father. Who will handle the household cleaning and cooking? What about feeding, bathing, and cuddling with your new infant? The latter, in particular, can feel foreign to men whose fathers weren’t as involved or nurturing. These fathers might need extra encouragement and instruction in order to bond with their babies.
Just as important as spending time with your new baby is taking time for yourself. Any (honest) parent will tell you that having a child changes everything. New parents suddenly struggle to find time to go to the movies, spend time with friends, or exercise. But the more you neglect those facets of your life, the less you’ll feel like yourself. It’s incredibly important for parents’ mental health to maintain some sense of their prior lives, whether that means setting aside time to journal or going to the gym.
3. Find support groups for new parents.
Even if you aren’t experiencing mental health issues, a newborn can be overwhelming at times. It can be incredibly helpful to know you aren’t alone in having those feelings.
Research indicates that hearing from peers can be more beneficial than receiving guidance from a therapist. A meta-analysis of five studies found that peer interactions can translate into real-world gains, underscoring the importance of a strong support network. If you need help finding a new parent support group, seek suggestions from a doctor or obstetrician, a maternity clinic or hospital, or a local therapist.
4. Seek professional help at the first sign of trouble.
If you find yourself experiencing symptoms of postpartum anxiety and depression, don’t be afraid to seek professional help. Like other mental illnesses, it can feel embarrassing to talk about postpartum anxiety and depression. This is particularly true for men, who often feel a need to maintain a strong facade.
Admitting you need help is the crucial first step to feeling better. Your experience as a parent can be drastically improved by speaking to a therapist or another medical professional and getting the right treatment.
Primary among those treatments are antidepressants. Research shows that the most common types of tricyclic antidepressants — selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors and serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors — have been shown to improve symptoms of chronic, moderate, and severe depression in about 40 to 60 percent of adults.
If you’re hesitant to try medication, there are other treatment options. Everything from yoga to a Mediterranean diet has proven effective at treating depression in varying studies. By reaching out to a medical professional, you can find a solution that works for you.
Feeling your best is the ultimate goal, as postpartum depression and anxiety affect more than fathers — mental health struggles can influence partners as well as children. By learning more about potential postpartum challenges and engaging in difficult conversations before your baby arrives, you’ll be prepared to tackle the responsibilities and emotions that accompany fatherhood. And the dirty diapers, of course.
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Photo: Getty Images
Men can sometimes feel uncomfortable about opening up about their feelings but it’s so important that you seek the support you need. Dads groups are becoming more and more common as a place for men to share their thoughts and experiences of becoming a parent with their peers. Find out if there is a group in your area.
The above article mis-characterizes the antidepressants used for treating depression. Tricyclic antidepressants (TCAs) are an older class of medication, still used effectively for treating depression. Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs) and Serotonin -Norepinephrine Reuptake Inhibitors (SNRIs
or dual receptor) antidepressants are newer and separate classes of antidepressants. The latter two have also proven to be effective in treating
anxiety that accompanies depression.