Back in 2015, a study was released showing that teens spent an average of nine hours on their phone per day, and tweens as much as six hours. At the time I was horrified by that figure. But now my stance (and pearl clutching) has relaxed a bit. Teens are spending that much time on their phones because they use those magical devices for everything from studying to keeping up with friends, and even recording memories as they do non-technology related activities.
However, that doesn’t mean I haven’t noticed a problem. There are times when the smartphone is an acceptable use of time, and others when it is not. For me, one of the biggest times to askew technology is at meal times. Not only is this the perfect time for family to gather in order to strengthen their bond, but there are other benefits as well.
A big one is teaching teens proper etiquette in their social life. Anyone who has seen a group of teens in a restaurant ignoring one another and staring at their screens know this is a lesson most teenagers need.
The Dad’s Guide To Smartphones At Meal Times
I don’t tolerate phones at the table, period. My wife and I decided on that a long time ago, and that includes our own. So the rule is simple:
If you bring your phone to the table, it will be taken away for one hour following the end of the meal. For dinner, this isn’t that big of a deal. But if it happens during breakfast, it is really a day long ban…we don’t have time to sit around for an hour to retrieve it before we are all out the door.
My kids had to face the consequences of this one a couple of times before they learned. The kicker? My wife and I have had to learn it a few times, ourselves. Nothing beats the glee in our kids faces when they see us whip out our phones to check Facebook, or a work text, and know we have been caught.
This is a great thing. It reinforces the idea that this is an important rule, since my wife and I have to follow it also. When grownups are held to the same standards, kids pay attention.
The outcome? Not only have they stopped bringing their phones to meals, but they have stopped looking at their phones so much while out with their friends. They even badger their friends to put away their own when they are together! They have developed a fear of missing out because they were on their phones, and that is a positive, not a negative.
See? Easy as pie.
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