Do opposite sex friendships really exist, or are they just relationships in waiting (or in secret)?
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by Hasani & Danielle Pettiford
Can men and women just be friends?
Most people agree that they can, with the help of clear boundaries. But when does an opposite sex friendship cross the line?
All relationships, whether romantic or friendly, are based upon some form of attraction. It’s not always physical or sexual. However, there’s some mutual interest or commonality that draws two people towards one another. While opposite sex friendships may start off with the best of intentions, often the lines become blurred as the relationship develops.
Here are 17 red flags that you’re either in a danger zone or have already crossed the line into more than just friendship with your “friend.”
- You wait to share conversations with your friend.
- You discuss your relationship problems with them and it’s a form of criticism towards your partner.
- Your friend discusses his/her relationship problems with you.
- You look forward to seeing your friend more than your own partner (The average couple engages in approximately five minutes of quality conversation per day).
- You start making comparisons between your partner and your friend.
- You offer more compassion and concern to your friend than your partner.
- You fantasize what life is like with your friend.
- You spend more alone time with your friend than your partner.
- You partner has absolutely no access to your conversations with your friend (voice mails, texts, emails, Social Media, etc.).
- You secretly spend money on your friend without your partner’s knowledge.
- Your friend is a source of argument and discord with your partner.
- You lie and secretly figure out ways to spend time with your friend (leave early, stay late, etc.).
- You accuse your partner of jealousy every time your friend is discussed.
- You create exclusive rituals with your friend that you both highly anticipate.
- You share feelings and intimate conversations with your friend, which creates an emotional connection.
- You engage in sexually suggestive conversation with your friend.
- You frequent social places and events without your partner, hoping to run into your friend.
Where do you stand on opposite-sex friendships? Whatever your answer is, make sure that you and your spouse are on the same page. Remember, that’s the most important relationship of all.
This article originally appeared on YourTango. For more like this from YourTango, try:
friends are really special and true friends are really hard to find. If you have good friends who always be with you never let them go.
Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible…with only a friend
Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful.real friend is real love
I have many more opposite sex friends than same sex ones. I just always truly enjoyed women more. Their communication, and style and interests always interested me more. Most have been just that. Great friends. A few went to fwb. But that wasn’t the norm. My best friend was a woman i hung with for over 7 years. No teal physical attraction but we shared so many interests. Even got her interested in motorcycles, as it was my passion,, and even that was a stretch due to her very safety and conservative nature. But it was all about sharing passions.… Read more »