Let’s not sugarcoat it…dating sucks.
Dating is like the epitome of your ego going into a Gladiator ring, with no armour, just your naked ass, putting yourself out there for an uncertain number of people to judge you, hoping it doesn’t get beaten to a bloody pulp.
With every disappointing date, every “ghost”, every “rejection”, every “catfish”, every broken heart, you toughen up a bit, get smarter, protect yourself by putting on more armour.
You can’t get hurt if you don’t show your vulnerabilities right?
But then the whole purpose of dating is to find someone to share your life with.
How can you do that if you’ve closed yourself off to the point where someone can’t see the real you?
It can seem like a catch-22.
To help you change your mindset, here are 25 Brutally Honest Dating Tips That Will Make You Say “Damn, You’re Right.”
1. Ask yourself, is what you want and need…what you deserve?
2. You won’t find someone if you’re addicted to the attention you get from dating apps
3. Time swiping > Time on dates? = FOREVER ALONE
4. Don’t have time to date? That just means you don’t really want to date.
5. How you love yourself is the way others will love you.
6. Don’t like them? Be an adult and let them know. It frees them (and yourself) up for someone else.
7. Stop this ghosting nonsense. Ignoring people is rude and immature.
8. Want someone with a 6-pack but you keep drinking 6-packs? That’s not what you deserve.
9. Be brutally honest with yourself: if you won’t date yourself, why would someone want to date you?
10. Treat yourself like crap? You’ll attract those who like to treat people like crap.
11. Dating is a learning experience. Rejection and failure are all in your head. Get over yourself! It’s not a rejection; it’s redirection!
12. Think you’re too old to be dating? Then why are you reading this post on dating tips?
13. If you don’t remember what they said on the date, you won’t know if they’re right for you. Pay attention and listen.
14. Only been texting or video chatting? Congratulations, you’ve made a pen pal, not a love interest.
15. How do you know who you are chatting with is who they say they are? That’s easy…meet up!
16. Ask yourself: Why are you dating? If you don’t know, then you’ve put yourself in a wild goose chase.
17. You’ve always wanted kids but they absolutely don’t? They’re not who you deserve. Move on.
18. Are you a firm believer in marriage but they aren’t? You don’t deserve each other. Move on.
19. Don’t look like crap on the first date. First impressions count. Take a damn shower and trim those nose hairs.
20. Do you value honesty and integrity but they’re not willing to meet you in person? They’re not who you deserve. Move on.
21. The more you know yourself, the more you know who you’re looking for.
22. Are you finger happy when it comes to swiping on dating apps? Enjoy the single life with your fingers.
23. Are you extra picky and judgemental? Go look in the mirror. You aren’t who you deserve.
24. Stop dating people you know aren’t right for you because you think you can change them. People aren’t your pet projects.
25. Think you can convince them to like you? You can’t. They don’t like you. Accept it and move on.
The key is to view dating as a learning experience and to not let your ego into the ring, hanging it on the door along with your self-judgment. It’s about finding what youneed, want and deserve so that you become laser-focused when dating.
Previously published on medium
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Photo credit: on iStock