I sacrificed a lot to make my dream of working in professional sports come true. I couldn’t afford to go to an expensive law school or a top-tier grad school like most agents. So I’ve studied the game of basketball from the basics to sophisticated coaching styles. On the business end, I read every book I could. I worked at several companies that allowed me to use my marketing degree while still learning sports law.
After a certain point, I gave up on the dream for good. I realized that the harder I work, the further away I seemed to move away from it. It wasn’t for a lack of trying. It dawned on me one day why I was no longer happy with the dream. I wanted it because I knew I could make a lot of money in short spurts. And it’s a career that comes with awesome perks. But the job itself became less and less appealing because of the sacrifices I knew it entailed.
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It dawned on me one day why I was no longer happy with the dream. I wanted it because I knew I could make a lot of money in short spurts.
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Once I gave up on that dream, I had some clarity on what my vision of success and happiness really is. It had changed over the years. We’re taught to never give up on your dreams. However, there comes a point in life where you understand that you’re not really giving up. You’re actually going back to square one. There, you might give yourself a chance to see a different path for yourself.
In giving up on one dream, there were three truths I discovered about the intersection of success and happiness.
You can have it all, but you’ll rarely have it all at same time. Some of us are born entrepreneurs, either because we’re natural leaders or we have creative minds that can’t be tamed. The life of an entrepreneur means dealing with FOMO too. You tell yourself being uncomfortable is worth it because missing out now means having so much freedom later. The thing is, we overwork ourselves for the love and obsession of money because we expect it to make us happy. You can’t be so tied to money that you ignore the positivity that already exists in your life.
You have to make time for happiness. Self-care has become a movement. Being inundated with depressing news stories that perpetuate hate and negativity means you have to make a conscious choice to find your happy. We schedule hours where we diligently focus on tasks that’ll accomplish small goals. It takes the same amount of dedication to access your happiness. You have to be deliberate in deciding how you’re going to sustain your happy and how you’re going to protect it when things aren’t going as planned.
Sometimes, not being busy is the right thing. One of my biggest pet peeves is when people talk about how busy they are. Being busy has become so much of thing that there are people making money off of teaching people how to maximize their time. It’s ridiculous. Being busy just means that means that your mind is overwhelmed. We falsely equate being busy with progress and moving forward. You don’t benefit yourself or your future by not knowing when to sit still or take breaks. The art of not being busy is actually an accomplishment on its own.
As I thought about a new offer from my company, I’ve been weighing the money I’d be making against the ideals I have about happiness and success. While money is always going to be a factor, my new career no longer forces happiness to take a backseat. The important thing is I feel fulfilled. When it comes to the intersection of being happy and being successful, always go after what fulfills you.
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