Having lost my wife four years ago, I found myself thrust back in the dating pool in the 50+ category without a clue as to what women look for in men. On top of that, divorces, widowhood, and midlife crises, have put thousands, if not tens of thousands, of men out there vying for the attention of the single women available. Then there are the many filters put up by women in their attempts at blocking men with other than honorable intentions. Can you blame them?
In talking with women, the one common thread I’ve noticed is they are tired of boorish, uninteresting, self-serving men with only one thing on their minds. For the most part, women are looking for well-mannered, interesting, and exciting gentlemen. They want a man capable of treating them with respect, communicating with them, giving them a little romance, and being fun to be around.
Do you want to be one of the upper 10% of available men that women seek in a relationship? If so, here are five ways to be more interesting to women.
Take up a few hobbies a woman would enjoy participating in. Pick two or three hobbies that you would enjoy, but make sure that a woman would find them interesting as well. Kayaking, paddle boarding, and antiquing are three out of thousands of possibilities. Any kind of dancing would be a good choice. Once you’ve decided on a few, then sign up for a course and start participating. You don’t have to be an expert. You just need to know the basics and enjoy the hobby.
Hit the gym and eat better. I’m not suggesting that you need to get ripped or be able to run a marathon. Just get active and improve your diet. Most men over 50 could stand to lose a few pounds and build a little muscle tone. So, get busy already. As far as your diet, cut back on the processed foods. Stick with lots of fresh vegetables and some lean proteins. Cooking these is super simple. I prepare most meals in 15 to 30 minutes.
Learn to dress better. Most men don’t know anything about fashion, nor do they care. Unfortunately, we are judged by our appearances. Make a little effort and learn how to dress better. You don’t have to wear Armani suits every day, but you need to ditch the food-stained t-shirt and baggy blue jeans. I was in the military for 20 years and was always told what to where. After retiring, I had no clue how to dress myself. I found an excellent website called Real Men Real Style that has helped me.
Read more. Always have a book to read and consider yourself a life-long learner. Just reading a minimum of 20 minutes a day will broaden your mind, make you more interesting, and improve your communication skills. Pick the right books. Something motivational, anything on self-improvement, a biography, or a popular best-seller would be good choices.
Be confident and have some direction in your life. Women are attracted to confident men. Have a direction in your life. Set some goals. Be confident of who your are, where you’ve been, and where you are heading in life. At the same time, you want to mix in a little humility and vulnerability. Just a little. Too much and you come off as being weak. You want to display confidence while avoiding coming off as a jerk.
If you are over 50 and suddenly find yourself back in the dating pool due to divorce or widowhood, then chances are you will find yourself at a disadvantage. Take heart. All is not lost.
By following the guidelines listed above, you will easily make yourself more interesting to women. Chances are, you will also meet some very nice, attractive women along the way who will want to spend time with you. Even if you don’t meet that someone special, you will have made improvements to your life that can help you look better, feel better, have more friends, and be happier. Trust me, you will have more fun than if you were to sit at home watching reruns on television every night.
I’m retired from the US Navy and now a freelance writer/photographer. As a recent widower, I am preparing for my next adventure in life, a multi-year RV trip of North America writing about and photographing all the wonders out there to see. Visit me at SurvivingWidowhood.com and join in on the discussions. Those interested in photography can find me at DigitalPhotographyMastery.com.
Photo: Flickr/ Geoff Livingston