If you’ve found your perfect match, don’t go MIA on her when she talks about commitment.
Commitment is such a beautiful thing, but it’s a dreadful word. As soon as it pops out of a woman’s mouth, her man suddenly goes MIA.
Fewer and fewer “couples” make it past the honeymoon phase once the man feels sh*t is starting to get real. Admit it or not, this is a common type of relationship now.
Let’s say your friends are asking the real score between you and your current beau, and you suddenly find yourself struggling for the right answer.
You thought of the relationship statuses in Facebook, but none of it best describes yours.
Are you f*ck buddies? Friends with benefits? F*ck buddies and hoping to be in a relationship soon? Or just happy and hoping you’re on the road to forever land?
Be careful of what you say because you know very well how embarrassing it is to tell your friends this beau of yours, who you described with the most powerful adjectives in Webster’s dictionary, suddenly went MIA.
Remember, we now live in a world where “courting” is replaced by “dating.” I think “courting” might even be on its way to becoming extinct.
And through the evolution of the 21st century, somebody coined the term, “dating game.” No matter how many times you say dating shouldn’t be a game, it already is. We need to play, be played and be smart.
Think of it this way: It’s a game and commitment is the price.
To all the men out there, if you already found your perfect girl, don’t go MIA on her. Here’s why:
1. Commitment-ready women will not take away your “freedom.”
Men always have this idea that if they commit to somebody, they are on their way to losing some of the coveted freedom they once had.
This is true in a sense that, of course, commitment would require you to spend time with your special someone, but it does not mean you cannot go out with your boys or be your own self.
Commitment-ready women want you to have fun with your gang. They also want you to have those alone moments we all need.
A commitment-ready woman would not want you to feel suffocated by her. By all means, she would give you your freedom as long as your relationship were not at risk and stable.
She’s willing to compromise. It’s just a matter of time management and uniformity.
2. You don’t have to text her ’round the clock.
We’ve all heard the man who always complains because his girlfriend demands he text her 24/7 and update her about his actions and whereabouts.
Only a woman who does not feel secure in her relationship would do this. A commitment-ready woman would not ask you to reply immediately, or will at least try not to make it a big deal out of it if it took you a solid hour to reply to her message or call her back.
Better yet, you don’t need to see each other that often; she wants her freedom, too. Like you, she also has her girls and her life. She would want you to do her the same favor.
Hell, we’re all busy, so forgive her if she takes a while to get back to you.
3. A commitment-ready woman does not fake the big O.
It’s not news to you that women want sex just as much as men do, but under the sheets, it’s not easy to make a woman climax. A man needs to make her comfortable, set the mood, do a lot of foreplay, find the right spot, etc.
A commitment-ready woman wants to have a happy ending just like you. If you had it before her, she would tell you she didn’t come. She does not want to fake it for your sake; you need to work on it.
She’s not shy to guide you through her body, tell you what you need to do and what she prefers for her grand finale.
She wants to be dominated when it comes to this area of the relationship, but at the same time, she also wants to show you her skills.
4. She’s frank.
The language of women is the hardest to learn, so we understand men’s complaints about women being so irrational at times.
A girl might say she’s fine when actually it’s the opposite. She’ll say, “don’t call or text me,” but the reality is, she’s waiting for your name to pop up on her phone.
A commitment-ready woman is frank about her feelings. Her yes means yes, and her no means no. She means everything she says and keeps her promises.
If you ask her if there’s something bothering her, she will not brush you off and say it’s fine. She will let you know what’s occupying her mind, and let you comfort her and do your job as a man.
5. She initiates sex.
We have our sexual needs as well. Sometimes, when a woman feels like her man is making a step back inside the bedroom, she will go out of her way and make the first move.
A commitment-ready woman wants to show her man that she wants to do it as well.
Need I say more?
6. She’s not needy.
Commitment-ready women ask for help when they need it. When they did everything they could and there is still a problem, they will not hesitate to ask their guy for help.
A commitment-ready woman knows her man would be pleased to know that, despite her independence, she still needs him and there are things she cannot do on her own.
So, if you ever come across a woman playing the game but willing to commit, don’t just go MIA on her. Don’t cut her rope off.
We are all afraid of getting hurt. Almost all of us have that relationship phase we never want to go back to, but you shouldn’t take out your fury on the next person who enters your life.
There is no formula for successful commitment, but aren’t you tired of relationships without labels and failed hopes?
Aren’t you tired of disappearing and being ghosted yourself? Aren’t you tired of open-ended endings?
Of course you are.
Because, the only things that should have open-ended stories are books, not people.
Originally published at Elite Daily. Reprinted with permission.
About the author: A tall girl with dreams taller than her. Majored in Communication Arts. Love’s to travel and write about travel and things that randomly pop out from the back of her head. You can read me at