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In American culture, guys get lots of advantages. We’re first in line for physical jobs, we make more money, and we rarely have to wait in line at the restroom.
In other areas, however, we men get the short end of the stick. Rather than ask for help with personal problems, we’re taught to suck it up. We’re expected to put on a happy face, even when our emotions tell a different story. If mental health issues rear their head, we’re encouraged to ignore them rather than seek treatment.
No question: There are times when men (and women) should suck it up. Getting in a fender bender or being passed over for a promotion are the sort of experiences that build character. We shouldn’t, however, let social pressures stop them from speaking out about their mental and emotional challenges.
That’s easier said than done, of course.
These famous men are proof it’s possible and, frankly, important for your future:
1. Michael Phelps
If you think depression cares about how successful you are, just ask Michael Phelps: “I can tell you, I’ve probably had at least half a dozen depression spells that I’ve gone through,” the retired Olympic swimmer admits. “And the one in 2014, I didn’t want to be alive.”
What made Phelps speak out? Despite holding the all-time record for Olympic gold medals, Phelps struggled with depression and anxiety for years. After opening up in late 2017, Phelps says, he’s found it “much easier to live” and credits the conversation with saving his life.
2. Brandon Marshall
When NFL player Brandon Marshall released his #StrongerThanStigma video in 2011, he became one of the first celebrities to announce a borderline personality disorder diagnosis. Marshall concedes that his anger and impulsiveness got in the way of his relationships, but he also saw his disorder as an opportunity.
“Before this ordeal, I kept asking God to show me my purpose. He gave me this,” Marshall says. “I’ll be the face of BPD. I’ll make myself vulnerable if it saves someone’s life because I know what I went through this summer helped save mine.”
3. Chris Schembra
Like Phelps and Marshall, Chris Schembra might seem like he has little reason to struggle. As a Broadway producer, startup consultant, and founder of relationship-building dinner startup 7:47, Schembra at age 30 was what most people would consider successful. Also by that age, Schembra had run the gamut of anxiety, addiction, and depression.
Although Schembra was put on medication as a child, his mental turmoil bubbled over as a young adult. “Externally, I was silent, but internally, I was screaming. I turned to blackout drinking, physical abuse of self, and lashing out for attention,” Schembra shares in a TEDx Talk. Through his support network, Schembra achieved a healthy relationship with substances, started a business, and began educating others about emotional health.
4. Kid Cudi
Both Schembra and Scott Mescudi, better known by his stage name Kid Cudi, liken mental illness to an internal storm. Realizing they couldn’t weather it alone, both eventually turned to rehab. And most importantly, both came out on the other side happier and more successful.
In a Facebook post, Mescudi explains that he was attending rehab for depression and suicidal urges. “My anxiety and depression have ruled my life for as long as I remember and I never leave the house because of it,” he writes. Today, Mescudi works with artists and brands on everything from music videos to baseball caps.
5. Howie Mandel
The only member of this list who’s been diagnosed with ADHD and OCD, comedian and actor Howie Mandel credits his quirks for his success on shows like Deal or No Deal. “I’ve always had problems sitting still and listening for long periods of time. The show spares me those challenges. I can live in the moment,” he tells ADDitude Magazine.
Mandel might have sought help for his ADHD and OCD earlier, but he grew up in a time when they weren’t even medically defined. “So, in my case, they were called ‘Howie Mandel,’ he jokes in the ADDitude interview.
6. Chris Evans
Had actor Chris Evans listened to his anxiety, “Captain America” might never have happened. Initially, he turned down the opportunity, but at the advice of his friends and therapist, he decided to take it on. Since then, Evans has rocked the Captain America role in multiple “Avengers” films.
The key for Evans? Quieting his mind. “Everyone’s brain is noisy, and the root of suffering is following that brain noise and listening to that brain noise,” Evans argues. Rather than assume it as part of his identity, he learned to cope with it through meditation, travel, and acting.
Mental and emotional issues don’t discriminate. However famous, successful, young, or fit you are, mental illness can bring your life to a halt. Push on, open up, and you’ll find yourself where you need to be.
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This content is sponsored by Larry Alton.
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Photo credit: Shutterstock