James Michael Sama on 8 little things to make her feel adored 365 days out of the year.
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The small things you do for a woman are the ones that mean the most. Why? Because those are the things that show her you’re willing to put effort in for her, just because. No holiday or special occasion needed.
A good boyfriend or husband knows that any man who waits until Valentine’s day to romance the woman in his life is missing the point 364 days out of the year. He also understands that while grand romantic gestures are great, the thought put into everyday activities is even better.
Here are eight small things that actually have a big impact.
1. Make her feel beautiful, every day.
This one seems obvious. Internet Romeos everywhere are reading this going “Hey man, I call girls beautiful every day!” I don’t mean just telling a woman she’s beautiful — any guy can do that. I mean make her deeply feel, in her heart, that you think she is the most heart-wrenchingly beautiful woman you’ve ever laid your eyes on.
Women are not often as confident as they come across. You need to reinforce her, no matter what. It doesn’t matter if she just got stung by a bee and her entire face is swollen like a basketball, she is still beautiful, and you damn well better act like it.
It’s not just in what you say — it’s in what you don’t say. It’s in how you look at her, how you talk to her, and how you touch her. Make her feel what you don’t need to say, instead of just hearing what you do say.
2. Be honest.
This is another big one. It may not seem like it, because honesty should be a quality that you express towards everyone in your daily life – but being honest with a woman you care about will show her that you respect her enough to be straight up with her.
Choose your words carefully, don’t express your honesty in a way that would hurt her feelings, but make sure she knows that she’ll get a straight answer when she comes to you for one, no matter what it’s about.
3. Don’t compare her to other women.
There’s really no reason to do this in the first place – but a woman shouldn’t be made to feel that she’s the ‘best’ out of ‘all the other girls’ because it implies that there are, or have been, other girls. We’re all adults, we realize everyone has a past, but there’s no point in bringing it up.
Instead of making your girl feel like the ‘best’ girl – make her feel like the only girl, because she is.
4. Don’t miss the little things.
Chivalry is a common theme in my blog posts – but that’s because it’s a big one. Often times the small things you do for a woman are the ones that count the most, because it shows you’re willing to put in effort for her just because you want to, and not due to a special occasion or event.
Don’t let the little things fade. The opening of doors and pulling out of chairs, holding her hand no matter how long you’ve been together, hugging her from behind for no reason – all speak louder than words you can say.
5. Listen.
In a healthy relationship, each partner relies on the other for love, guidance, and advice. Sometimes, just taking the time to genuinely listen to what she has to say, and not saying anything at all – will say more to her than your words ever could.
If a woman is complaining to you, remember that it means she trusts you enough to express her feelings to you. Don’t betray that trust.
6. Start, and end your day with her.
Even if you can’t see each other every day, by sending her a simple text when you wake up, and before you go to bed, she will know she’s the first and last person you think of every day. That is priceless.
7. Don’t try to solve her problems.
Men are naturally problem solvers. When we hear about an issue we are compelled to attempt to come up with a suggestion or solution. When a woman vents to you, that’s not what she’s looking for. She wants you to simply listen and at least make an attempt to understand.
She doesn’t want you to give her the answer, but the support she needs to figure it out on her own.
8. Remember the little details.
Whether it’s the date you met, the song that always makes her cry, that craving for french fries she gets once every 6 months, or that perfume she loves — paying attention to small details and doing something about it to surprise her, will show your woman that when she talks, you hear her.
It shows her that no matter how busy your life is, despite the pressure you get at work, or the millions of other things you need to worry about – she holds a special place in your heart, and your mind. A place uncluttered by the other noise in your day, or the hectic life you probably both live.
A place reserved just for her — and that, gentlemen, is special.
This article originally appeared on James Michael Sama’s Blog. Follow him on Facebook and Twitter.
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Photo credit: Getty Images
Jama Sama is a huge advocate of old school patriarchy. He labels it “chilvary”. Almost everyone these days agree that patriarchy was a deal with the devil, except for fringe people like evangelical Christians and hardcore pickup artists like Roosh. Why GMP keeps publishing his patriarchal stuff I have no idea. Probably a case of the well documented and discussed (even here) phenomenon of modern, narcissistic women wanting to both have their cake, and eat it too. Well, the news is – you just can’t. You don’t have a RIGHT to have your cake and eat it too, ladies. And… Read more »
1,2,3,5,6,7 are things all people should do regardless of sex. 4 and 8 are basically the same thing and people should not really spend to much time worrying about them. If you spend to much time focusing on the little things you’ll miss the big picture. A relationship isn’t about the man doing all the work in maintaining it. Its both people working to maintain it.