How you respond to a guy’s request to take you out depends on how you feel about him, whether you want to date someone right now, and whether he’s your type.
Being polite, considerate, and honest with this guy can have a positive impact on you, even if you don’t plan on dating him.
When your heart has been broken a couple of times, mustering the courage to say “yes” can be difficult, no matter how wonderful the person is. If it is difficult for you to say “Yes” to a relationship, you are not alone.
If there’s one thing I’ve been guilty of when I dated, it was looking desperate.
Primarily because I was desperate.
That being said, I’ve learned how to say yes to a guy without looking desperate over the years.
Learning how to confirm a date is part of the subtle art of dating.
Confirming your date is polite, shows interest, avoids miscommunications, and puts your mind at ease.
With just a little courage and critical thinking, you can find the right thing to say to a guy who asks you out.
Here’s the thing, though: Do you want to be in a relationship where you have to play games like this in order to hold his interest? Where you second-guess every move you make and worry that maybe you shouldn’t have sent that last text message?
That makes dating not fun.
Relationships that are fun and that last in the long-term are based on the kind of honesty and openness that leads to a deep connection.
That’s why it’s almost always best to be clear and open with your intentions and your questions from the start.
Does he want to start a relationship? Is he interested in dating casually? Does he just want to go out to a movie? Understand his endgame so the two of you don’t have different ideas about your future plans.
Non-verbal way of saying yes without looking desperate
Words are only half the battle when saying yes. If you are truly excited about his offer then your body should reflect that excitement.
Body language is the science of non-verbal cues such as gestures, facial expressions and the look that convey a person’s emotions and intentions.
Communication becomes clearer and more understandable when we learn to interpret the messages sent by the person as a whole, rather than relying solely on the words that come out of their mouths.
Skills can be developed to understand the codes of voice, speech, clothing and body language.
According to science, these are a few easy ways to convey enthusiasm throughout your body.
1. Maintain a mutual gaze with a soft smile.
Mutual eye contact — neither lack of eye contact, nor a little … uh, overly interested can signify approval.
Longer eye contact, especially from high-ranking people, makes us feel privileged. This is especially true when you receive eye contact from celebrities or movie stars.
More eye contact also indicates that you are curious because when people pay more attention to their surroundings, their blink rate usually decreases.
Maintain eye contact when you agree, when you listen, exchange ideas, or when you look at your amazing self in the mirror:
However, take a look now and then as too much eye contact can be considered threatening and make people uncomfortable.
2. Avoid keeping your arms crossed.
Don’t cross your arms or your legs if you can avoid it. Stand with your arms open and your legs shoulder-width apart.
A closed posture can convey fear, hesitation, and anxiety.
Crossed arms are a dead giveaway that you’re tensed and may get the guy to back out.
People who are feeling angry, hostile, or defensive may clench their fists and even combine this gesture with a tight-lipped smile or clenched teeth.
3. Show off your neckline.
Your neck is one of your most vulnerable areas. Neck skin is much thinner and requires protection. And exposing your neck and throat opens you up.
When someone tilts their head, they are showing that they’re comfortable enough to let their neck be exposed.
You can often see the head tilt -especially from women when they are attracted to someone, although this can also be used to indicate platonic interest.
4. Give him an eyebrow flash.
When someone does an eyebrow flash, you’ll typically see their eyebrows raise slightly for less than one-fifth of a second.
The eyebrow flash can show interest professionally, as when giving approval, agreeing to something, thanking someone, or seeking confirmation. It’s used as a nonverbal “yes” during a conversation.
You may become embarrassed or afraid, causing you to avert your eyes away from him.
Fight against your shyness and stare straight into his eyes while maintaining a bright, genuine smile so he knows you are as interested as he is.
5. Avoiding rounding your shoulder.
Believe it or not, hunched shoulders are becoming even more common nowadays, as you’ll see people slumped over, looking at their cellphones.
Over time, this might even become the norm, as people develop chronically-hunched shoulders from staring at smartphones and hunched over laptops all day.
With shoulders rounded and their neck hunched forward the guy will definitely get the hint that you are interested in him.
Forward shoulders may indicate that someone is trying to hide something or feeling vulnerable since you are closing off your vulnerable neck and chest areas.
6. Give him an equal handshake.
This handshake is a breath of fresh air and signals mutual respect for both parties.
A good eye contact, a warm genuine smile, an extended arm with a slight bend at the elbow is more than enough clue to show you are interested in going out with the guy.
An equal handshake signals confidence, openness, and power during an interaction and leaves both of you feeling warm and fuzzy inside.
When gesturing with your hands, make sure your hands are open most of the time and people can see your open palms. It is also a good idea to keep the palms facing upward most of the time, rather than downward.
7. Give a genuine smile.
When you see a Duchenne smile, this likely indicates genuine happiness. The Duchenne smile is a smile characterized by the crow’s feet wrinkles around the corners of the eyes along with upturned corners of the mouth. This is a real smile.
It is difficult, but not impossible, to fake a real smile.
In most cases, we smile dozens of times in normal conversation, but many of these smiles are given out of politeness or formality.
When smiling, remember to “smile with your eyes,” instead of just your mouth.
8. Rub the back of your ear.
OK, you might have noticed a trend by now — touching yourself basically means anxiety.
Not in all cases, but unless you’ve just got an itch that won’t go away, repetitive self-touch in all forms is a way to ease tension throughout your body.
The ear is rubbed, pulled, scratched, touched, picked at… or rubbed vigorously can express approval without words.
This post was previously published on medium.com.
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