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What is the meaning of life? Why am I here? What is it I am supposed to do with the little, yet precious time I have here on earth? These are questions almost all of us have contemplated at one time or another, but far fewer have answered. What we are really seeking is our purpose, and before many of us can even attempt to contemplate our life’s purpose, life, ironically, gets in the way. We get into perpetual states of acting and doing. We are highly adaptive creatures, and before we know it this perpetual state of activity becomes normal. Yet, we have no idea why we are doing it or where we are going.
This life of empty action can lead to stress, anxiety, boredom, depression, and a wealth of existential maladies. Having a purpose in life is the key to having meaning in our lives, our personal well-being, and finding fulfillment in our work and day-to-day activities. Purpose also helps in other important areas of our lives like self-acceptance, being part of a community, and working towards something bigger than ourselves.
Unfortunately, only about 1 in 5 Americans has a strong sense of purpose, and less than a ⅓ feel a strong sense of accomplishment in their lives.1 Our life’s purpose is powerful. When happiness – a fleeting emotion – leaves, purpose and vision is what keeps us going. We must live purposefully and mindfully in order to find meaning and fulfillment in our lives.
The Importance of Purpose
Purpose can be defined as living intentionally in a specific, well-chosen direction according to our values. Our purpose is bigger than ourselves. While it is guided by our internal values, our purpose should be outwardly directed and focused to what we can contribute to the world. A purpose bounds our lives, and boundaries bring freedom. Without boundaries we would never know where to begin and end. We would have no idea how to direct our attention and actions, nor on what we should focus. When we live according to our purpose, we are taking all of your life’s energy and dedicating it to achieving a particular end. That is a powerful way to live.
People with a purpose are more resilient and are actually in better health than those without a purpose in life. Our lives need structure, and purpose gives it that structure. Living by our values brings peace of mind. A purpose informs us of who we are, informs others of what we are about, and helps us ensure we are on the right path, doing the right work. Purpose allows us a new and deeper level of self-awareness and social awareness.
Self-awareness comes when we take the time to mindfully reflect on and exam our actions and honestly appraise whether they are in-line with our purpose, and living purposefully brings with it a social-awareness of how we fit in with and relate to the larger world. Are we trying to live sober but are surrounded by patiers? Do we want to live a life devoted to justice, but work in a job that does not treat people, animals, and/or the environment in a just way? No need exists for us to be something other than what we are when we live purposefully.
Mindfulness
One invaluable component of living purposefully is mindfulness. Mindfulness can be defined as the purposeful, non-judgemental awareness of what we are experiencing in the present moment. By living mindfully, we bring awareness to our current state and actions. This awareness allows us to know when we are not living according to our purpose and helps us return to our mission and true selves. Some studies even suggest that meditators have a greater sense of purpose; that meditation actually helps them find, strengthen, and improve their life’s purpose. A mindful life is a purposeful life.
We can bring mindfulness to our lives in a variety of ways. I have written about mindful practices here and mindful self-compassion here. When it comes to our life’s purpose, we can be mindful in several ways.
Mindful Moments
Throughout our day we should take time to tune in to what we are feeling and thinking. We can set a timer to alert us to when to pause from our activities, take a few deep breaths, and explore what we are thinking and feeling at the current moment.Are we bored, agitated, or stressed? Happy, content, and in a state of flow? Why are we feeling these emotions in our current state? Were we focused on what we were working on? Or were our thoughts somewhere else entirely from where our bodies were? These moments helps us to become aware of what we are thinking and feeling and to not get caught up in a particular emotion or get carried away by thought patterns.
Respond Do Not React
Reaction is based on habit and is our first emotion about a situation. When we respond we are taking the time to consider the situation completely and give it a response that is appropriate. When someone approaches us with a job offer for more money or an exciting opportunity, our initial reaction may be “Yes!” but before we answer we need to pause and consider the situation fully. Will saying yes to this offer allow us to live more aligned with our purpose? Will this opportunity bring us closer to realizing our life’s vision? If the answer is not yes, then we should respond with a “No.”
Reflection and Introspection
During a flight, navigators must periodically check to make sure the plane is still on its proper flight path. Being off by a few degrees might not seem like much, but over the course of a three-hour flight that adds up and could mean the difference between landing in Orlando or Ontario. The same goes for our life’s journey. Ever end up far from your intended destination and think about how you got there? It is rarely one large decision or event that did it, but rather an accumulation of small decisions and events along the way.
We need to be introspective and reflective on our life’s journey to ensure we are living according to our purpose. We need to take the time to think about if we are heading in the direction we think is best for us, and if we are not, then we need to develop a plan to get us back on our chosen path.
Building a Purposeful Life
The formula for living a purposeful life is pretty simple:
- Develop a purpose. Dictated by your values and principles, how do you want to make the world a better place?
- Build a vision for your future based on your purpose. Based on your purpose, what is your end state? This should give you hope for the future.
- Set and achieve goals that move you toward your future.
- What work should you be doing now to move toward your desired future state? Your purpose is what gives you the motivation to get out of bed to work on the goals that move you toward your vision.
- Stop to mindfully reflect on where you are going, what you are doing. Are you still heading in the direction of your purpose? Does your purpose still hold meaning for you?
The vision is the “what” and the purpose is the “why.” If your purpose and vision are not aligned, then you need to re-think one of the other. But simple is not the same as easy.
Many of us struggle with developing our purpose. First, we need to understand that our purpose and especially how we fulfill that purpose can change throughout our lives. As we move through the stages of lives – single man, husband, father, and grandfather – how we find and live our purpose changes. What worked for us at 25 may no longer work at 45.
Second, we must never think our purpose is not “good enough” or “special enough” to guide our lives. Making sure that people have working cars or stores to shop in is needed as much as making sure that children and adults never go hungry.
Below are some ways to develop and build your purpose. These are difficult questions to answer, but they are important questions.
- What are my values and principles? What do I give the greatest importance to?
- What do those values say about me? What themes or ideas can I develop around those values?
- How do I represent those values in my daily life? How could I express those values?
- What am I really good at? What do I enjoy doing? How can I bind those into a larger purpose for my life?
- What is missing in the world? What do I think needs to be done? What do I want to contribute to the world?
- What do I want my legacy to be? If my purpose was written on my tombstone, what would it read?
- What accomplishments am I most proud of in my life? What activities make me feel the most satisfied? Gives me energy
- What activities get me into a state of flow? What do these activities have in common? What do they mean to and say about me?
- If everything in my life were to work out perfectly, then what would I be doing in ten years?
- Where am I now in relation to my future self? What would it take to get to that state?
Once you have a purpose – a grand, overarching reason to be on this earth – what can you do that helps you live your purpose and move you toward your vision? Think of these as missions that help you achieve your overall objective. If your purpose it to alleviate suffering in the world, then you can start volunteering at a hospital.
Test out these missions and take time to mindfully reflect on how they worked for you and if you want to continue with them or try another approach. Living purposefully can also help us live mindfully. When we are fully engaged with meaningful work, we become present and stop wanting to be somewhere else, doing something else, as someone else.
Conclusion
The first few sentences in this article asked the age-old questions about the meaning of life. When we ask those questions, we are asking it of the universe. We want the grand, cosmic forces of life to tell us what we should be doing and how to live. But we have it backward. The universe is actually asking those questions of us. Our answer comes in the form of how we live our life.
Our purpose determines our answer. We are only here for a short time, so we must take it seriously. Do not sacrifice long-term satisfaction for short-term pleasure. Travel light. Let go of what you no longer need and carry only your purpose. Be aggressive. Move forward with strong intent toward your purpose and your vision.
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References:
1 Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. 2016. “Well-Being Concepts.” https://www.cdc.gov/hrqol/wellbeing.htm
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