I have greatly benefitted from privilege throughout my life.
I am a white heterosexual male who grew up in a middle-class, two-parent household in the American suburbs and who has not suffered physical disabilities or intense trauma. I did not choose these characteristics or earn their advantages. I feel, at once, not to blame for the problem but responsible for helping to develop a solution. Although that solution is far from obvious and beyond my capacity to solve alone, I believe there are a few preliminary steps people like me can do to assist — or, at least, not stifle — others’ fight to attain the same privileges that I enjoy. Each builds to a simple act — acknowledging privilege and the challenges imposed on those who do not have it.
The challenges are daunting. Just review the obstacles to long-standing movements’ modern flavors(#MeToo, Black Lives Matter, Same-sex Marriage) that take up the mantle of paving a path to justice for historically oppressed people. While the issues are new to the public spotlight, the same issues are not new to victim’s lives. Their struggles have echoed throughout our nation’s history, as women, minorities, the LGBTQ+ community and people with different physical capabilities have fought against disheartening odds for equality and inclusion.
Despite some progress, their fight continues, but one group remains characteristically absent from the critical discussions that will blaze the trail forward — white heterosexual able-bodied men. Whether choosing to stay away from controversy, searching for the right words to say, or merely being apathetic, these men (we) generally remain silent on issues of racial and sexual prejudice, only to have that silence interrupted by those who speak from ignorance or insensitivity. This trend must change, and white men can take a more active role in the discussions shaping the future, but, before we can make a meaningful contribution, there are a few steps that we, as white heterosexual able-bodied men, must take.
First, we must acknowledge that everyone is somewhat influenced by personal biases. We all judge others in some way before we have a chance to fully understand their true character or appreciate their abilities. This impulse may even be an inescapable feature of our evolutionary biology. So, acknowledging that impulse does not entail normative judgments about whether such influence is good or bad in every scenario. (Sometimes it may even be prudent to listen to your internal alarm bells, such as when an apparently deranged man is running at you with a meat cleaver.) Instead, acknowledging personal biases’ influence on our thoughts merely means noting that human beings tend to generalize based on stereotypes — a relatively uncontroversial idea.
Second, we must recognize that some (maybe most) personal biases are subconscious. Sure, sometimes a source of bias is easy to identify in personal experiences, explicit teachings, or professed ideology. But, usually their origins are obscured in the fog of society’s subliminal messages, which we tend to filter through accidental assumptions and deep insecurities. Seemingly inert societal features, like how certain people tend to be depicted in the media and who typically fills economic roles, can have profound effects on how we come to expect strangers to act, think, and live. In this sense, most people can be thought to “experience” subconscious bias more often than they intentionally inflate prejudice. Though, again, this recognition is merely a passive observation about human behavior, not a moral condemnation of it. We cannot shame ourselves for spontaneous thoughts to the same extent that we can hold ourselves accountable for how we transform thought into action.
Third, we must actively seek to identify and counter our personal biases. Once we recognize that everyone is somewhat influenced by personal biases and many (if not most) of those biases are subconscious, we must accept that overcoming such influence will require a sustained, deliberate effort on our part. It is not enough to merely avoid overt prejudicial acts, thoughtlessly unburdening ourselves of the weight of systemic prejudice. Instead, we must earnestly reflect on the assumptions and motives that drive our decision-making to weed out the hidden forms of prejudice, which facilitate the relentless taint of inequities. In doing so, we need to internalize a sense of personal accountability for our mindsets, not seek to downplay the effects of, or justify the causes of, our existing biases.
Fourth, we must engage in uncomfortable experiences designed to challenge our established views. Doing so is necessary to soberly evaluate the relative (dis)utility of personal biases, such as the difference between fear of the apparently deranged man with a meat cleaver (useful) versus fear of the person with a different cultural background (not useful). These experiences should target our very sense of identity to test our personal narrative’s reality and our cherished qualities’ worth. To be sure, doing so is not easy. Such experiences are uncomfortable because they expose difficult truths about our ability to impact situations that we haven’t assumed responsibility for. They may even conjure feelings of raw guilt, and no one wants to think of himself as contributing to the socio-economic conditions that force others to work harder, struggle more, or feel oppressed. However, avoiding uncomfortable experiences only serves to foster purposeful ignorance, calculated to ignore problems as a means of evading the effort required to solve them.
Fifth, we must focus on responsibility, not blame. The fear of blame and the desire for validation are perhaps the greatest obstacles to taking the steps detailed above. Many feel that to admit the existence and power of personal biases (even subconscious ones), especially in uncomfortable situations, is tantamount to accepting blame for another’s pain and downplaying our own struggles with adversity. This is simply the wrong way to view the battle against systemic prejudice, which is about correcting unjust inequality and not allocating fault. The right way to view the fight for a just society is to say: “I may not be to blame for these problems, but I have a responsibility to play my part in correcting them.” In short, privilege is a state devoid of guilt at the onset, but complicity in privilege’s continued effects is a culpable inaction.
Sixth, we must recognize the relative power of these biases. Although any personal trait is susceptible to prejudice, throughout recent history those of a different race, sex, sexuality or physical ability have most often found themselves victims of a culture of discrimination, which has been perpetrated mainly and most effectively by white heterosexual able-bodied males. This culture touches all levels of economic, social and political life. It impacts the job market, pop culture, and government. It is seen on news headlines and Facebook rants. It is obvious and everywhere, but too many of us choose to ignore it or, worst still, deny its existence. Such willful ignorance and illogical denial are some of the most disrupting forces in the fight for equality because they allow those with the most political and economic influence to forgo a solution by dismissing the problem. We need to have an informed understanding of the uphill battle that most minorities, women, LGBTQ+ people, and those with medical disabilities face in our society today, not hide behind broad — and baseless — generalizations or inflated perceptions of our personal life challenges.
Finally, we must recognize the advantage that we enjoy in society today. White heterosexual able-bodied male privilege is not a radical leftist talking point. It is the real, albeit sometimes not obvious, benefits that people like us receive from the legacy of discrimination. It is going to an interview knowing that the person on the other side of the table will probably look like you. It is turning on the television expecting to see your kind portrayed as professionals and intellectuals, rather than caricatures, sex symbols and criminals. It is walking around town unencumbered, without fear of suspicion, unwanted advances, or hateful sneers. It is having advantages in most situations, which are easy to recognize but difficult to explain. It is being the default, against which all others must explain, justify and measure their existence.
Acknowledging this privilege is not an allocation of fault but, instead, a realistic observation about the world we live in — all else being equal, we have an unjust advantage.
Acknowledging this privilege is not an allocation of fault but, instead, a realistic observation about the world we live in — all else being equal, we have an unjust advantage.
Although the recognition of these simple truths will not solve the problems that have developed over centuries of discrimination and oppression, it is a prerequisite to moving forward — a first step. People scream for equality, because they do not think we can hear their struggle. They cry for justice, because they know we ignore their pain. They ball up their fists out of frustration, because we are unwilling to extend our hands in friendship. If we are to move forward in helping to correct the wrongs of the past and the inequality of the present, we must first say, “we hear your struggle, we acknowledge your pain, and we want to extend a hand to do our part in building a more inclusive future.”
These are simple things that we can do to make a difference and cost us nothing but our false pride. By being sensitive to the needs and hardship of others, we let them know that we are ready for real change and that they are not alone.
Empathy and acknowledgment are not solutions, but they are a start.
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Previously Published on Medium
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