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We are all aware that words are process starters. However, the introduction and the intent of a word or phrase may be filled with “secret” codes. The clarity you scream; let us explore one of the most spoken and cherished set of words that are readily accepted with no consternation, and has been proudly received, universally when describing our sons and daughters, these ever-popular words; student-athlete.
The university did not want to incur this expense of its injured athlete, thus their clever attorneys coined the phrase student-athlete. This policy then served to abdicate the institution of any responsibility to render financial compensation for any real or perceived injury or injuries that may have occurred during his/her voluntary participation as an athlete for the said university. Simply put, the student-athlete was not covered under the institution’s insurance policy because he/she was not an employee of the said institution, One may ask, how does this have any connection to our much-beloved ideals of sportsmanship and compassion?
The African proverb; “Beware of the naked man who offers you his shirt,” may have a place at this table. However, you may be expecting to be served a steak and will instead be served a serpent.
Our connections lie within the annals and the very core of these two flattering seemingly impervious words that are incessantly uttered by the sports world and it enthusiastic followers. That idea being that ALL the universities, learning institutions, etc. have a binding obligation to one another for their loyalty, and unquestionable support regardless of the circumstances, written or otherwise. Does this transcend to the defeated, regardless of station?
Shall we exam a small sample of what is engrained in the psyche of a competitor and the impetus that steers the ship?
• To the victor goes the spoils.
• Be courteous to your opponent(s).
• Be gracious in defeat.
• A winner never quits, and a quitter never wins.
• You’ll get em’ next time.
• No one like a sore loser.
• You’re a quitter.
• You let everybody down.
• Maybe you should find another sport.
Sportsmanship and compassion are at war with themselves. Some of our most revered and respected coaching experts are on record strongly suggesting that winning is the only thing that matters when engaged in any area of competitiveness, visa, vee (a) in the workplace where we strive to become the employee of the month, (b) at the weekend poker gathering, where we loathe losing, (c) getting the lead part in the school play, (d) having a secret or public desire to becoming the ‘big-man/woman” on campus. You can see the list is infinite. Who wants to lose? Who desires his/her opponent confirming the fact that he/she was just defeated?
We understand the nuances and the intended ramifications behind the words sportsmanship and compassion. Showing compassion and empathy when you were the victor is the humanitarian thing to do. However, do you think that the shaking of the hand of the defeated foe and a kind word lessen the pain of defeat? After all your being victorious was the “mission,” and you were ‘programmed’ to win at all cost and let your opponent fret about his/her misgivings of having lost the competition.
Ironically, once you have carried out your mission successfully, you are supposed to utter some words that you really do not mean—“nice game”—to someone that really does not want to hear it, consequently, you confirm for them, that they obviously were not successful in carrying out the mission or that they do not measure up—or does it?
I, as an empathetic, sympathetic man who chose to participate as an athlete pose this question because of the oxymoronic connotations of these two word, student-athlete, as they relate to sports and competition and how we seemingly have chosen to completely disregard this ideology when it comes to granting, sharing and requiring that every single person is afforded the uncompromised, expectancy of receiving; humility and civility.
Athletes are taught, in a competitive sense, to defeat their opponents through trickery, deceitfulness, taking away their desire to participate, to plant doubt in their minds about their abilities to compete against you and again the list is infinite. I share these points with you because most if not all athletes are taught these same tactics regardless of the sport or the competitor.
My question then is how do sportsmanship and compassion peacefully co-exist?
We are all familiar with words like narcissistic, greedy, self-centered and other unflattering terms that are prevalent in today’s society, we often remain stoic as to their impending presence as they are allowed to sit precariously upon the horizons and sunsets of our very existence, unfortunately; many of us may choose to develop and nurture a cerebral calmness associated with these terms whereby we may allow them to manifests themselves, are we guilty of looking the other way, often dangerously embracing patterns of ‘convenient-amnesia’ if this disappointment has not visited our domain?
I bring up this point to start a conversation that will address how dangerous and disingenuous the world has become as it attempts to reduce the lives and the wellbeing of human beings to be determined by mere words. To totally disregard their pain, their suffering, and their feeling of hopelessness simply due to PROCESS STARTERS, as an athlete, I figured what would be a better way to ask these questions than to compare them to words like student-athlete and sportsmanship-compassion.
Let us not limit the intended purpose of these process starters by being blinded by the effervescent sounds of the words sportsmanship and compassion by allowing them to sit at the fifty-yard line on the field of the enclosed arenas of our minds, empower someone on the playing fields of life, inherently touching their hearts with the PROCESS STARTER, love.
Melvin “Casey” Lars ©
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Photo credit: Pixabay