And how it can make you a better husband.
In junior high and high school, I can remember having crushes on boys who would spend a great deal of time with me, only to learn they liked one of my friends. They would spend hours talking to me, getting to know me, but not falling in love with me.
What seemed devastating as a teen is something that I have learned to appreciate as an adult. The insight you get when you are in the friend zone will only make you a better spouse later. If you find yourself in the “friend zone,” allow me to share the best part of this season of life and what I learned from it.
1. I learned how to be your best friend.
When you had your guard down because we were “just friends” I was able to learn how to be a best friend to the opposite sex. I learned what makes you tick and how you wanted a girl to love you. I learned how to talk to a boy and how they think. I learned your strengths and your weaknesses.
2. I learned what really matters to you.
You taught me that you will fight hard and long to gain the attention of the girl you are interested in. I watched you plan, think, and plan some more to do anything that would get the girl to pay attention to you.
3. I learned what men find sexy.
You taught me that looks really were not the most important thing. I was sometimes shocked by the girls you would chase. I never thought they were really your type, but I cheered you on anyway. I hope in some small way that encouraged you to find the girl who would be your cheerleader in life.
4. I learned how to listen.
Granted, I was already hanging on your every word, but you still gave me knowledge that I could have learned no other way than to be your friend. I kept your secrets, and in doing so learned how to gain a man’s trust.
5. I learned how to be vulnerable.
Because I wanted you to see what a catch I was, I was able to let my guard down and let you into places where I would only let a very trusted friend. I could trust you with my heart, and therefore learned that there are men who are very responsible with a woman’s heart, especially one they have become friends with first.
I cannot say being in the “friend zone” was my favorite place, but I am so happy that when I finally found the one, being his best friend and cheerleader was the easy part. So, to my teenage crush and the men in my life who have been great friends, I thank you for the things you taught me. To all those stuck in this “just friends” season of life, know that you are gaining vital information for the future. Rest assured this will make you a better spouse.
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