OK, so when we were last together Olympic swimmer Ryan Lochte got Knockdee out of the house. If you don’t get the joke it’s because you didn’t read the recap where Lochte kept using his name in “cool” phrases, such as, “we have to Lochte this down.”
The Head of Household (HOH) who spearheaded the exit was none other than Kato Kaelin. Kato was very proud of himself, and by the way, he has become MUCH more articulate since the O.J, Simpson trial, and kept asking no one in particular, “How great is this?”
With an eviction comes a Head of Household (HOH) competition and Joey Lawrence of Blossom fame immediately started freaking about who the new HOH would be. How bad was he freaking? I have severe anxiety and I thought he was wigging.
And of course, it wouldn’t be an episode without dual Olympian Lolo Jones crying. She went with what the rest of the house wanted, knowing Lochte had enough votes to go see Julie and she voted with the house to keep herself in good graces with her remaining housemates.
As she sobbed, she repeated, “It’s hard as an Olympian to vote another Olympian out.”
I get that.
Joey has been playing double agent, so as Tamar is sitting in the kitchen and Joey decided to start a conversation to find out who she’s aligned with. It was clear that she smelled a rat and wanted no part of that nonsense so she clammed up.
To be clear, the rat wasn’t a tiny rodent but rather a former teen heartthrob who made girls swoon when he said, Whoa.”
Then former NFL running back and pot lover Ricky Williams decided to stir the pot and tells the two toughest women in the house, former WWE Diva Natalie Eva Marie and the Olympian Jones, that Joey thinks they’re too cocky.
I’m sure we haven’t seen the last of this mess.
For the HOH competition, they paid homage to horror films of the 70’s and 80’s and called this one, Slaughter House. One at a time the housemates, except for Kato, entered the Slaughter House in the dark with only one of those flashlights that go around your head.
They had to find a set of car keys and start a car outside the house so they could “get away”
They encountered bodies, men with chainsaws and other crazy stuff. To find out how truly amazing this was, check out the video below.
Some of the highlights were Natalie Eva Marie shrieking, very high pitched, when chainsaw guy emerged, Tom Green saying, “The hardest part is not freaking out and this is a freaky place,” and Tamar.
Tamar walked to the door, looked at it and said, “aw hell no.” She turned around to leave but after a couple steps she came back and cracked the door open. She then asked the dead guy on the couch (more than once) if he had the keys.
With no response, she then walks back out the front door with her hands up and proclaimed, “That’s it!”
Tom eventually won the HOH competition and found the key in the hand of another dead guy in the bathtub. As he reached for it he said, “Sorry dead guy. I need this.”
On a personal level, I’d like to congratulate Tom Green for going at least two episodes without making a one testicle joke. I guess that means he’s feeling more comfy around his housemates and doesn’t have to force humor.
To end it all Tom nominates Tamar and Joey, so we will see what happens next. Check back here at 4 PM Eastern on Sunday, April 3 to find out.
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