When we reward everyone, no one learns.
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Participation trophies, when did that start?
When I was a kid we received ribbons for placing in the annual Field Day events. There weren’t trophies for participation. Participating was its own reward.There were no trophies for participating.
Others stood on the sidelines but, you decided to do something different. You stepped out and joined a smaller group/team to do something either together as a team or, competing with each other.
You don’t win anything for joining. You win when you participate against another team or, individual. And when you are the most successful team or individual, you’ve won an award. That’s worthy of an award.
And then, that KIA Sorento “Built for Football Families” TV ad came out. And with that a big, collective “hell, no!” to participation trophies.
Yeah, what’s up with those participation trophies? Since when? The team wins the entire season and is treated the same as those that didn’t? It doesn’t make sense!
Thinking about my daughter’s experiences in recreational soccer, they knew who won and who didn’t. Even though a score wasn’t kept. Kids are smart. What was even more important to her (and us) was how she did as an individual on the team. When she scored a goal or, made a pass. How she treated other team members. How she was learning to be a part of a team. That was more important to us. And it was more important to her.
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I think that’s what we need to get back to. When we reward everyone, no one learns. No one learns sportsmanship, how to deal with defeat and how to develop better (possibly winning) strategies.
When everyone wins, winning is diluted and the moment to provide motivation to improve is missed. Motivation and learning from failure have effectively been eliminated. That’s flat out the wrong way. We have few better ways to learn than from our failures.
Equal rewards for everyone sets us on the wrong path. And it seems to have led to other problems. A lifetime of “fair treatment” has led children to feel entitled. And these children grow up to be adults. What does that mean for our kids, the future leaders of America? Will they feel compelled to support this idea of entitlement? That’s a very scary thought.
And while we’re at it, where are the trophies for academic achievement?
Award the Principal’s List students, like my daughter, with trophies. That would seem to be a better use for trophies than just recognizing participation. She’s okay with the certificate, she’s in middle school.
For sure, the effort is worth the trophy. She’d probably think a trophy was overkill. But, that’s not the point.
She’s an academic champion and should be recognized as such.
There are no participation trophies in academics, and that’s just as it should be.
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Photo: Brad.K/Flickr
This essay originally appeared on The Digital Dad.
Read Rob Ainbinder’s column every week here on The Good Men Project!
And thank you for sharing this.
Rob is also a horrendous writer, who no doubt was handed out a participation trophy for putting in commas in the wrong places.
I’m a 42 yo father of 3 kids. Growing up, I played a variety of organized sports (hockey, baseball, basketball, and tennis) and I received participation trophies for hockey and baseball. My kids have played hockey, baseball, soccer, and done karate. They have gotten participation awards for all of those sports. And personally, I laugh at the “War on Participation Trophies”. People celebrate all sorts of tokens of participation every day. Whether it’s a varsity jacket for being on a high school football team that doesn’t cut anyone to the finisher medals for you Tough Spartan Mud Race of your… Read more »
yup. I had a closet full of trophies that were handed out at the end of every baseball and soccer season. They have no value. They certainly don’t encourage enthusiasm to do better, And they are huge and hideous to boot. My kids were 14 an 12 when we moved into a small house and had to be vigilant with limiting what we would move. When I asked them about their dozens of trophies and Student of the month awards, they just shrugged their shoulders and said, yeah, toss ’em. Because they had NO VALUE. Student of the month is… Read more »