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Men are truly the abused citizens of the world these days.
Their rights and needs are put on the back burner for that vile movement, Feminism. Men don’t even want to get married anymore, and it’s all your fault, ladies! Just ask The Daily Mail!
Poor men. So sad!
You guys have a lot of trouble dating these days, now that women have this silly notion in their marble-sized brains that they should maybe want to be treated like equals to you. HOW RIDICULOUS. EW!
Luckily, you can work around these ideals. Women aren’t really smart enough to comprehend them anyway, you know?
Here are some dating tips and some great places to find women for you wonderful, sexy, and oh-so entitled males. Godspeed. No one will find you creepy in any way with these sure-fire, babe-magnet pointers.
Where to meet women:
Talk to her when she’s on a date with someone else.
This is a tried and true method of winning yourself a lady. Every woman deeply craves male attention and validation. By showing her you’re not put off by the fact that she chose to go on a date with a person who is definitely not you, you’re showing her your amazing self-confidence. Nothing turns on women more than a guy at a restaurant… alone… with the sole purpose of picking up a woman.
Chat her up in a Victoria’s Secret.
Never mind why you’re in a Victoria’s Secret when it is a woman’s lingerie store and has nothing to offer a man, this is fertile hunting ground for single guys looking to score some tail. Offer to help her choose a bra that might fit her ample bosom, put forth your unsolicited advice on the panties that would look nice on her fine derriere. Women appreciate being told what makes them look sexy by strangers, didn’t you know?
Give her pointers while she’s lifting.
Women love being told that they are doing things wrong, especially in the weight room at the gym, where she is outnumbered by sweaty, grunty men. I mean, the whole reason she’s in there to begin with is to get attention from guys. Forget wanting a sculpted physique. She doesn’t know what she’s doing anyway. It’s not like women understand how to use gym equipment. Give her pointers on her form while she’s halfway through a set, casually benching 100 pounds. She will love that.
Approach her when she’s wearing headphones.
This has been a very hot topic among men’s advice blogs as of late. Despite what it may seem, a woman wearing headphones is not a clear-cut social cue to leave her the fuck alone. No, women are only wearing headphones to seem mysterious and sexy. Don’t let it deter you! Women really want you to come up to them, scream in their face until they notice you, and have you chat them up.
Schmooze your way into conversation while she’s buying Vagisil.
Pharmacies are a great place to find women because a woman in a pharmacy is probably looking for medicine. This means she’s in a weakened state and is primed for you to corner her. Hang out by the feminine care aisle, as this is where womenfolk congregate. If she’s buying Monistat or Vagisil, even better. She’s not trying to discreetly buy yeast infection medication, she’s looking for a date, silly! You know you’ll be able to get into that pussy as soon as her three day, anti-fungal treatment is over.
Peruse the children’s playground for single moms.
Single moms are easy prey because they have no self-esteem, as they’ve been abandoned by their spouse or boyfriend! It definitely was not or could not have been their choice! You can’t get much better than that, fellas. Hanging out on playgrounds when you don’t have a child of your own may seem socially unacceptable, and possibly liable to make you look like a pedophile, but if a police officer asks why you’re on a swing designed for a 5-year-old, you can just tell him you’re looking for some single mom ass. He’ll understand!
What to say to say to her:
Comment on her appearance every chance you get.
A woman has no interest in being told she’s smart. She’s not, after all! Instead, constantly tell her how hot and sexy she is. Tell her that her “tits look nice in that top,” and other things of that nature. Make her feel like an object. Women LOVE that!
Put her down in a sweet and playful manner.
Everyone knows the more you insult a woman, the more she will like you. Make sure she knows her looks are the only thing she has going for her. Tell her you could be with any other girl in this bar, but you decided she was the one you wanted. Women love to feel shitty about themselves. It makes us horny AF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Talk about your ex-girlfriend as much as possible.
If you have an ex that fucked you up and made you hate all women (because women are evil, manipulative bitches, after all), use this to your advantage. Talk about your “whore” ex as much as you can. It will make her feel close to you, and want sex with you. Bonus points if you cry a little. Women love emotion!!!!!!
Don’t use the “F” word because she will be confused.
Under no circumstances are you to use the word “Feminism.” You want to keep the uncomfortable idea of “equal rights for women” out of your dating repertoire. Stupid Feminism has been confusing women far and wide into thinking they have the right to be treated as humans. Feminism is the anti-dating topic. You want a woman to feel like property, not a person with agency.
Don’t talk about anything too complicated.
As you know, women have brains the size of apricots, and are therefore unable to comprehend complicated matters. Steer clear of things such as politics, philosophy, or pretty much anything that requires her to have an opinion. Women don’t have opinions. So you’ll only wind up leading the conversation and explaining what all of these deeply complex subjects entail. Stick to safe subjects, such as The Kardashians, shopping, and beauty products.
Disclaimer: This article is 100% satire.
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This story by Gigi Engle originally appeared on Ravishly, a feminist news+culture website.Follow us on Twitter & Facebook and check out these related stories:
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Stock photo ID:174836957
This article panders to the Leftist notion that we will live in a utopia when women and men are “equal.” There is no such thing as equality of outcome, only opportunity. Women and men are completely different, and feminism has wreaked havoc on male/female sexual polarity (that is the stuff of great romance), the nuclear family, and real masculinity. Most of the guys who write on this forum probably has a wife who subscribes to feminism in some way. Don’t take the blue pill, take the red pill.
This should be lenghtened, and rewritten with italics followup to expand on why and how. Otherwise, it serves no real purpose but to waste time. Also, there are exceptions to every rule listed here. It happens.
These are actual things women experience, however that gets lost under the snarkiness, insincerity and sarcasm. Who ever wrote this is very frustrated and didn’t express it well.
Im not convinced that this was snark or sarcasm and believe that that disclaimer at the end is just a sad attempt at getting out of being held responsible for a nasty bitter attitude.
Oh I do agree it reflects a nasty bitter attitude. There is a spectrum to sarcasm that ranges from good natured to meanness. I think it’s on the Mean end. And I do think it’s snarky. I am not a fan of snark as I think it’s mostly negative.
To me sarcasm implies a lack of seriousness. As in the things said in a sarcastic piece wouldn’t be used in serious legitimate conversation. Unfortuantely there are feminists that seriously and honestly think some of the things in this piece actually represents how the majority of real world men think.
I don’t think sarcasm necessarily means a lack of seriousness. There are many ways to communicate sarcasm, just as there are many ways to communicate humor. Danny, but actually, feminist or not, these are very real things women do experience. Women experience these things. I don’t know how to say it any plainer or in a way that will encourage a real commitment to care and listen. This is the disconnect I see so often. The refusal to believe that what women are saying they are experiencing in these micro-agressions is true. And women being blown off on our experiences… Read more »
I think you kind explain the dangers of venting and saying mean things then hiding behind a sarcasm tag which is what I think this piece is doing. If any men get seriously mad just claim sarcasm but if men don’t take this post as a call to action to get men to do right by women then it means men don’t care about women’s experiences. It seems like a defense mechanism that allows the writer to say what they want no matter how nasty and when the writer doesn’t get the desired result just blame the listener/reader for taking… Read more »
Read Men On Strike by Helen Smith. When you realize you don’t actually need a woman in your life, it actually frees you from becoming an appliance or ATM who exists to cater to her wishes.
Oh look. Another feminist that writes a man hating screed and then covers their ass by saying its satire. Doesn’t surprise me at all how badly people want to justify hating men.
How interesting…
A few weeks or so ago, I read a piece written by Gigi on Medium.
http://bullshit.ist/meninism-is-so-hot-right-now-26173983f363#.7kn5ctkgf
What I found even more interesting (and ever more entertaining) was Karen Straughan”s rebuttal.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UB6iyuoSsI4
I find Gigi to be very representative of the modern feminist type of woman (a la Jessica Valenti et al). These are women who preach gender equality but who stridently oppose the government spending one dollar to fund domestic violence shelters for men. Yet, insist we taxpayers fund Planned Parenthood. Hmmmm.
Gigi’s smugness, arrogance, and condescending attitude reminds me of one Hillary Clinton.
Or you could just leave them alone, after all Women need men like a fish needs a bicycle. Who cares what the tits look like, rise above it and see the game for what it is. Socially condoned prostitution, money – time – effort in trade for your pandering pursuit and dreams of coochie. You pay to play at your own folly.
You know…..it’s strange that Boris can make a comment like this and no one calls it out as hating on women.
If you write satire and feel the need to explicitly state it as such, it may be indicative that you should revise it so it comes off as a joke at someone’s expense instead of just venomous and condescending.
Yeah, I agree with this.
Satire or not, this piece strikes me as man-hating. I assume it is not simply a product of the author’s imagination, but is based on male behaviors she or others have observed. And to someone like me, who is very concerned about the real problems facing boys and young men, and even those facing adult males, the sarcastic opening immediately turns me off. It reads: “Men are truly the abused citizens of the world these days. Their rights and needs are put on the back burner for that vile movement, Feminism. Men don’t even want to get married anymore, and… Read more »
It is man hating. I only looked at the article because I saw two comments on it. Even then I only read the first paragraph or so and the bold text. I could see where the article was going. I thought about writing some real sarcastic response that would “flip the script”, but decided that when GMP and ravishly go low, we go high.
Which pretty much shows the double standard that runs around here. You can trash men all you want as long as you claim it as not being serious but even joke and satire is an excuse for trashing women.
But I like your idea of going high. Maybe they will eventually realize that we are doing what they ask and see just how hypocritical they are.
Clearly the person who wrote this has things to work through a lessons to learn. They won’t get far in their goals with this attitude. But understanding they got stuff to learn is important. I don’t think they are even at that point yet. I don’t believe people think it’s okay to trash men more than any other group.both genders face their fair share of trashing and support of exploitation by the other gender. Whenever we get into discussions about porn and sexual material, men seem to universally support objectifying women because simply, men get horny and apparently deserve to… Read more »
I agree with what you say but what I’m talking about is how things are done around here specifically. I think a similar piece addressing “entitled chicks” would not be taken as kindly around here.
Probably not. Not saying I liked or agreed with the approach. I certainly understand why the tone of this article bothered you. But part of the reason you wouldn’t see an article here on gmp like that about women is because it would be like having a piece that said “minority privillege”. Women and minorities have been historically discriminated against. But if you think women are entitled,please feel free to write that article. I am sure that would be an interesting conversation.
But part of the reason you wouldn’t see an article here on gmp like that about women is because it would be like having a piece that said “minority privillege”.
I find it interesting that when talking about privileged men there is zero effort put into quantifying it. Nope its just privileged men as if we are a collective that all benefit. But as soon as privileged women are pointed out suddenly we need to quantify it?
Funny.
Danny, so you don’t believe in white privilege? And if there are white people who are poor and struggling, does that mean that white privilege is not the dominant narrative in our society regardless? Our country was built on men, especially white men, working a society that benifitted them the most. The affects of which are still reflected in our society generations later.
p.s. I am still waiting to see you call Boris out like you call out every article you believe to be unfair.
Yes white privilege exists just as male privilege exists. The difference is in how the term is applied. There are certainly some advantages that can come with being male just as there are some that can come with being white. However that doesn’t blanketly mean that to be male is to have those advantages and it doesn’t mean that to be white is to have those advantages. There is a huge difference between “there are men who are privileged” and “men are privileged”. The former talks about a specific subset of the gender who have those privileges while the latter… Read more »
Nope. I am not all over that because I am not familiar with a poster named Akibara. I’ve noticed Boris posting a lot lately in a couple different articles and I don’t see anyone calling him out. It would be nice to see men call other men out for their misogyny. Whether he responds or not. I think it’s legitimate to bring it up considering the tenancity at which articles that choose to address topics other then men as victims, get regularly ripped into. Actually Danny, yes, to be male or to be white infact does mean a white and/or… Read more »
Actually Danny, yes, to be male or to be white infact does mean a white and/or male infact does have those advantages. That is the nature or privilege. Being a white male that’s struggled in life doesn’t make that any less true. And this where the use of the concept of privilege gets muddy and almost useless. At this point there is not even an attempt to prove that someone has an advantage its literally just, “You have advantages because I said so.” “Being a white male that’s struggled in life doesn’t make that any less true.” That’s not a… Read more »
No Danny, it has nothing to do with me saying men have privileges and making it up on my own “just because”. It has to do with the long standing institutionilized privilege that men in general greatly benefit from in this society. Perhaps the real dogma here is denying that privilege men benefit from because heterosexual white men rather be victims to a society that treats them better than any other group then help other people equally enjoy the same benefits and equalities they already get.
Perhaps the real dogma here is denying that privilege men benefit from because heterosexual white men rather be victims to a society that treats them better than any other group then help other people equally enjoy the same benefits and equalities they already get. Yeah that’s a dogma too. But thankfully I’m not saying that white and/or male privilege dont exist. Just saying that declaring someone privileged based solely on characteristic (and that is exactly what you are doing when you say that men or whites as a class have privilege) is bound to bother people because it removes the… Read more »
Apparently the “conversation no one else is having” requires copy/pasting the occasional bit of antimale hate that is found pretty much anywhere else in the gender discourse. So edgy. Much nonconformist.