Knowing that Jim Zetz was dying of pancreatic cancer, photographer Lindsey Villatoro decided to help the dad and daughter duo stage some of the important life moments that she knew the two would miss.
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Weddings are supposed to be happy events, but in the staged “marriage” for 11-year-old Josie Zetz, the day was filled with sadness, and the glaring reminder that her dad wouldn’t be around to walk her down the aisle on the real big day.
Knowing that Jim Zetz (62) was dying of pancreatic cancer, photographer Lindsey Villatoro decided to help the dad and daughter duo stage some of the important life moments that she knew the two would miss.
In 72 hours, Villatoro raised enough donations to purchase a wedding dress, cake, flowers and all the other necessary parts to make Josie and her father’s day perfect.
Zertz walked Josie down the aisle where a pastor pronounced them “daddy and daughter,” and he placed a ring on a right-hand finger.
Although sad, the fake wedding will help Josie remember her father on her real wedding day, Villatoro said. Villatoro filmed the tear-jerking event for the family.
“Josie, you will forever have a video of you and your dad walking you down the aisle to play at your wedding in years to come, as if he was physically there.”
This post originally appeared at Elite Daily. Reprinted with permission.
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Katie Gonzalez is a contributing writer covering fashion and feminism. Katie graduated from Dartmouth College with a degree in Middle Eastern Studies and currently lives in Haifa, Israel, splitting time between academic research and scouting for “The Middle East’s Next Top Falafel Wrap.” She enjoys a hot cup of green tea and a Joan Didion novel to take the edge off her aggressive online shopping addiction. Follow along on Twitter and Instagram: @KatieGonzalez12
To all of you who are criticizing this for being anti-feminist, I think you are projecting your own values onto this wedding and what it means for the little girl. Weddings have a strong symbolic message of a woman passing from the protection of her father, the most important man in her life, to that of her husband. In my mind that is a beautiful thing having to do with love and family and caring. Instead of destroying that tradition to put women on level with men, it would make more sense to me to ALSO have men walked down… Read more »
This one gets my approval, and that’s hard to do. Why? Simple. This was a way of celebrating dad-and-daughter-ness, in a way appropriate for a child to participate in. It wasn’t about her making a lot of wacko, unrealistic promises about who she would marry or when she would have sex or any of that other stuff that 11 year olds shouldn’t have to worry about (or be held accountable for). It was simply a celebration of the relationship between a young daughter and her loving, dying father. Yes, it was painful for her. It was painful to watch. But… Read more »
I think this will be a wonderful memory for her when she gets married. I’ve been to many rehersal dinners and weddings where they did a mash up of photos of the Bride and Groom from their childhoods. I think seeing something this included in that is a beautiful memory. As a woman whose father passed away before I got married, I would have liked something like this to look back on. I also think this article could bring up a discussion on what kind of impact fathering children at older ages ultimately has on the child. While older men… Read more »
Stephen, I’m not sure what you’re saying here. Her wedding, which for many women, is an important time in their lives and having this memory for her is great. It’s also a memory for the dad who knows he will not be around.
What’s stereotypical about wanting to walk your daughter down the isle? Marriage is one of the mile stones in peoples lives, a mile stone that dads can certainly relate to. Personally, I struggle with a society that wants to eliminate such moment/events by categorizing them as “stereotypical.”
“for many women, is an important time in their lives” well yeah if at 11 years old your father dying wish is that he wants to fake marry you I guess you will grow up thinking it should be the most important day of her life! And don’t force it, nobody wants to eliminate the marriage itself, I just wish people realise that it’s not ok to play with a child’s mind for your own selfish reasons. Have you seen the movie “My Life without me” http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0314412/ that’s a beautiful gesture, leaving tapes of you telling how much you love… Read more »
Taly, We don’t know their family dynamics so given the gesture, I can only imagine that the gesture falls in line with their beliefs. You appear to make it sound as though this dad is being selfish when it’s clearly a loving gesture. I can imagine his daughter, as she’s ready to walk down the isle at her wedding, she close her eyes and imagine her dad being next to her. It is, for most women, the most important day in their lives and I’m not understanding why you struggle with it. And to go so far as to say… Read more »
There is nothing bad about wanting to give your daughter good memories. However if for the father the weeding seems to be the most important thing for his daughter. He is just not a good dad. At least not a pro-feminist one and I thought that’S what good men project is about. Not spreading old stereotypes in a nicer looking box.
A wedding is at that moment the most important step in the lives of both the bride & the groom. Most want to share the moment with loved ones. I think when the father walks his daughter down the isle it is symbolic for the father and the daughter, recognizing life will never be the same again.
As a dad who from the moment my daughter was born, imagined walking down the isle with her. Gabrielle, it’s sad that you saw this article/video the way you did. Perhaps because you’re not a dad, you can’t understand what goes through the mind of a dad.
what goes through your mind is that you are super protective of your daughter cause she is a girl, that you will be really strict about the guys your daughter sees but not at all the same way if you had a boy, after all she is a princess, YOUR princess, so you would totally think is normal to implant in your daughter of 11 years old weird memories about marrying her father.
It just got really dusty where I am.
I had a similar reaction Gabrielle, not on the video but on your commentary. I find your comment to be creepy and distasteful.
I don’t see the point of this item at all, and, if her white wedding is supposed to be the highest point of this young girl’s future life, how this is relevant on Good men project website, you’d expect it in Hello, or People mag. I will not even comment on video, not sure if I find it creepy or just so distateful.
It’s relevant because it is about a father and his daughter. There is absolutely nothing creepy about a father wanting to give his daughter memories to hold on to when he knows he is going to die. Perhaps you haven’t ever lost anyone who truly matters to you, but I can tell you if I had known beforehand that several people I love were going to pass I would have wanted to make as many memories with them as possible.
Nothing creepy about it? About giving a child the memory of marrying her father? Oh yeah cause it’s fake right, and a child of her age will completely understand that! You can create so many other memories, like a party in the daughter name, videos, not fake marry her, that’s just crazy