Recently, Geer Oskam had one of those “Yes, I’m really a dad!” moments.
Daughter, something I look forward to a lot is when you are able to walk around so we can go on adventures together. I remember my dad stopped at every blade of grass – he had so much patience with us. I want to be like that as well.I walk around the park with you twice a week. When I stop walking you can get restless, so I tend to keep moving.There is a playground with a nice restaurant around the corner from your moms, I go there with you quite often and stand there rocking you while I read a newspaper.
Last week I had my first ‘real dad’ conversation at this restaurant. A mom came to me and asked me which brand of baby carrier I was using. She told me that her husband likes to use this baby sling which your moms also use. I told her that this sling is too complicated for me – it’s meters long and you have to knot it around you and your baby. She agreed, too complicated, she wanted the same baby carrier as me.It was my first real parent to parent conversation. Parent to parent, without knowing the other parent and only talking about “baby”, no exchange of names.
The only thing that connected us was the fact that we both are a parent. I think she didn’t know I was gay. She just talked to me like I was a dad with a baby in a baby carrier that she liked.
Originally published at twogirlsaboyandacup.tumblr.com
Photos courtesy of the author
Part 3 I Really Feel Like a Dad Now 6/15/14
– See more at: https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/just-became-a-father-jvinc/#sthash.mcItuM0J.dpuf
Photos courtesy of the author
Part 3 I Really Feel Like a Dad Now 6/15/14
– See more at: https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/just-became-a-father-jvinc/#sthash.mcItuM0J.dpuf
Photos courtesy of the author
Part 3 I Really Feel Like a Dad Now 6/15/14
– See more at: https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/just-became-a-father-jvinc/#sthash.mcItuM0J.dpuf
Photos courtesy of the author
Part 3 I Really Feel Like a Dad Now 6/15/14
– See more at: https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/just-became-a-father-jvinc/#sthash.mcItuM0J.dpuf
i’m not really sure what you’re being gay has to do with any part of the story.
Are you just trying to differentiate yourself from straight parents because you believe gay parents are different to straight parents?
Hi Nick, good question. No I’m not different than any other parent (and yet I am as we are all unique). I write about situations that every parent experiences. The part where I am gay is only relevant because that is the starting point for our story: looking for an alternative construction in becoming parents. Apart from ‘normal’ parental issues it is “the law” which makes it difficult for us three to be a legal parent and it is society which makes it sometimes difficult for us. These things I like to document. For the rest I am just a… Read more »