Every so often articles pop up which revolves around friends, there’s this particular topic which involves “friends who only contact you when they need something” that falls under the category of toxic friends which baffled my way of thinking. “Is it not the decent thing to do, as a person, to help a friend … in moderation of course”
You should feel slightly pleased and satisfied with yourself, as a result of your past endeavors together, be it a short period of time, you have made a mark on this individual amidst the never-ending growth of people that they’ve met. It doesn’t matter if this they live in a cabin in the woods, this person thought about contacting you and literally went through with it; with action involved. It’s similar to this “I can think of people who would actually enjoy this article but I wouldn’t directly send it to them”
I don’t mean to demoralize the significance of small favors like taking you somewhere and lending money; I’m also not talking about school and work related issues, which are task opportunities in the environment that just happens. I’m looking at the person who reached out and bothered not just you but also your time, including their own, to ask for help. You may have that particular set of skill to accomplish the problem and if it’s not the skill it may be the heart or mind which is needed more and there is nothing wrong with that. This generates a feeling of a higher quality of character and image about yourself and dare I say a modest ego boost.
“I relish the experience when someone asks me for help, considering, of course, my personal factors whether I humbly accept or decline the proposal. This gives me the liberty for re-evaluation of the friendship and the person who reached out.”
While no relationship is split equally keep in mind that there is a difference between being supportive and being a sucker. I do believe that some people are unaware of being used but I don’t expect it to last long, the human instinct and cognitive thinking will kick in and help grasp the predicament they’re in. Not to mention the endless streams of related subject matter both on social media and the media itself. Come to think of it, if it’s constantly depicted to be a tit-for-tat situation than the human race is surely doomed, we have to live not just for our individual selves but rather as a whole; to move past the expectations of ordinary conceptions and to propel ourselves towards progress subsequently leaving behind stagnation.
Granted no one wants to admit that the time spent were misused, they weren’t I assure you. That point in your life made an impact on who you are and is now lodged in your memory, whether it be bad or good. Besides, you wouldn’t be even interested if this wasn’t someone you still consider a friend.
Undoubtedly there are types of friends who serve as pure negativity and an energy drain, while these are the ones who you should immediately put on the list there are some who aren’t all that bad, the ones you should least ponder on. (And don’t tell me you haven’t asked for a few favors or needed help during your lifetime. Yup, now were talking)
You don’t have to decline and immediately shrug them off or cut them out of your life completely, just take the time to amend your friendship and recognize if it’s still growing. Reconnecting with an old friend can be quite interesting especially if you haven’t bonded in a while; they may not always be there when there is a crisis but they can often share those small moments of joy.
Photo Credit: Getty Images