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When Greg Miraglia joined a police cadet program as a freshman in high school in 1978, already knowing that he was gay, he was confronted with a boldly homophobic workplace culture. This amplified in 1981 when the AIDS epidemic broke out and anti-gay rhetoric reached a fever pitch, impressing on Greg that he could never be out in the workplace. Later, Greg was told by his supervisor and even the Chief of Police that he might be investigated to see if he’s gay, which would end his career. Knowing California had legal protections, he mustered enough courage to threaten to sue the police department if it pursued the investigation, successfully ending the witch hunt.
Only when he left law enforcement and pivoted to education did things start to change. Though still not out at work, Greg became acquainted with Judy Shepard after inviting her to speak in front of his students. Heeding her words – that we change hearts and minds by sharing our stories – Greg decided once and for all that it was time for his story to be shared. Little by little, Greg began to come out at work and then to family and friends, each time to warm support and open arms. Not only did his personal life improve – so did his professional life, where Greg thrived as both an educator and a published author focusing on issues relating to the LGBTQIA+ community and law enforcement.
Transcript provided by YouTube:
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[Music]
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foreign
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I’m from Moraga California in 1978 I
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discovered law enforcement as a possible
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career I got really excited about it and
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I had a chance to join a police cadet
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program as a freshman in high school in
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a smaller town called Walnut Creek in
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the East Bay area but I remember walking
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in the door already knowing that I was
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gay and very deeply closeted because in
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1978 you really couldn’t be out and
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survive anyway and I walked in the door
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to the police department and the very
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first the very first hour of the first
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day I remember hearing
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a barrage of homophobic remarks and
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these were coming largely from other
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teenagers people that were in the cadet
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program but there were adults in the
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room there were police officers in the
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room that were our mentors and they said
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nothing and I I discovered right away
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that there was no way that I could be
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out in this profession I graduated high
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school I got hired by that department
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full-time I was super excited about that
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career and that was in 1981 and that’s
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when the AIDS epidemic broke out and I
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remember sitting in a patrol briefing
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and hearing the sergeant give us some
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training information about this disease
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that could kill you and he said if you
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ever come in contact with anybody you
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think is even possibly gay make sure you
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put on a mask and gloves
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and I was thinking to myself here I am
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working with colleagues and everybody’s
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afraid and if anybody knew that I was
1:27
gay they would see me as a threat and I
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knew I’d be fired and I would never be
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able to to do this job I left my
1:32
department that department in 1988 I
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went to a larger city called Fairfield
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and it was like stepping back in time 20
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years it was even more homophobic than
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the first agency and and so I knew now
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as a supervisor going into that agency I
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had to really keep myself hidden so in
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1992 I’d been at this agency now for
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four years I’ve already been working in
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law enforcement for 14 years
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so I had a lot invested in this and I
2:01
was working for directly for an
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assistant chief at the time he called me
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to his office one day and I walked in
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the office and I could tell something
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was not right he had a very serious look
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on his face almost a nervous look on his
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face I mean I could still see it to this
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day so he told me to sit down and close
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the door and he had a notepad out and he
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was taking notes and he said I’ve had a
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complaint from one of your colleagues
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and I have to investigate your lifestyle
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and I knew exactly what he meant by that
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he wanted to find out if I was gay
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California did have employment
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protection for sexual orientation and
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gender identity at the time and I knew
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that
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and I don’t know still to this day where
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I got the courage and or the guts if you
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want to call it that
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I lean forward
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and I just told him I said you know what
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you’re going down a very dangerous line
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of questioning
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and if I ever hear another question
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about this again I’m going to sue you I
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got up and walked out of the office
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terrified but
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absolutely as angry as I’ve ever been
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and the chief’s office was right across
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the hall and I walked in his office and
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I slammed the door and he looked up and
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he said what’s what’s wrong and I told
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him what had happened and he looked at
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me and said
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well Greg if you are gay it’s going to
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be very difficult for you to Be an
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Effective leader in this organization I
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was speechless I thought this is the
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chief of police telling me this and
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I think he saw the anger in my face and
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I also think he was smart enough to know
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that he may have said something that
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would have not been good for him and he
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said what do you want me to do about it
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and I just said you’re going to make it
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stop I don’t want to ever hear another
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word about this again and if I do I’m
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gonna sue you everything and I said I’m
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leaving and I’ll be back when I’m
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getting ready and I stormed out so after
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I left the chief’s office I just didn’t
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know what to do I was completely stunned
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by what had just happened and I went to
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our employee assistance program our
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police psychologist who I trusted very
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intimately I had worked with him a lot
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being the training and Personnel manager
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for the agency for a while and I told
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him what happened and he never asked me
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if I was gay or not
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he was very supportive
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he said what happened was wrong and I
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don’t know to this day but I suspect he
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called the chief and said you just
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stepped in it and you better be careful
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because I never heard anything else
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directly from any of my supervisors or
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the chief again so I left finally in
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1998 I got into training and teaching
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full-time and then in 2000
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life changed I met Judy Shepherd the
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mother of Matthew Shepard and if you
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remember he was the young man he was
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murdered in a pretty vicious hate crime
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in 1998
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and I had a chance to bring Judy
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Shepherd to Napa Valley College where I
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was working full-time at the time
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to do a community presentation one of
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the things that she used to always say
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was that the way we’re going to change
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hearts and Minds is by sharing our
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stories it started to really resonate
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with me and every time she would say
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that it resonated even louder and louder
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and louder
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and I was getting pretty passionate
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about this work and I started to to
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realize that I had a story to tell and
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if I really wanted to create some change
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of my own that I needed to come out and
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share my story so in 2004
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by happenstance there was a student in
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one of my classes who I thought was gay
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and I don’t know why I would make such a
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bad judgment today but I decided that he
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was going to be the one I was going to
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tell we sort of talked about getting
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together and talking about our mutual
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stories a couple of times and then we
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agreed to meet after after school and at
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a restaurant and so we met and I came
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out to him and he was incredibly
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supportive very very helpful and nothing
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bad happened to me he was a great mentor
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and a great support
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moving forward and gave me some advice
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about how to tell my parents
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and the other people in my life my
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parents were very supportive and all my
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friends were very supportive
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I never heard a negative word
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to my face I clearly underestimated them
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so later in 2004 I met my now husband
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we’ve been together ever since and one
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of the things that he encouraged me to
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do was to write a book to tell my story
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and that really is what started a lot of
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the new work that I’ve been able to do
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in helping law enforcement and helping
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other people come out and to enjoy an
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authentic life and I’ve had some amazing
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opportunities from being out and being
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who I am I started in LGBT studies
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degree program at the college that I
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work at and I now teach that
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I’ve had a chance to write a total of
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four books or law enforcement and most
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recently I got to speak at the FBI
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National Academy on LGBT issues for the
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first time in their entire history they
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had never done a class on LGBT issues
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and none of that would have happened if
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I had stayed in the closet
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and I think I’ve really been able to
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make Judy’s words that inspired me a
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truth trust your instincts
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and don’t be afraid to be who you are
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live an authentic life
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This post was previously published on YouTube.
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