My inner voice called and I listened…
But not immediately.
At first, I attempted to ignore, numb and drown it out. Yet again dismiss my intuition like another case of fleeting insanity like so many of us are taught to do. But eventually, a year and half later in December 2013, I came to my senses, surrendered and finally listened. It was a bold move quitting my six-plus figure career of 14 years, ditching all my first world possessions and fitting the remainder of everything left I owned into two small carry-on sized bags. I’d never traveled internationally before and much less solo, but casting doubt aside and minus a travel plan, I bravely decided to hit the road less traveled alone at 33.
People thought I was crazy. Hell, I thought I was crazy. Regardless, I took another step towards the cliff, closed my eyes in faith and jumped, hoping what awaited me below was a bed of pillows and not a bed of razor-blades.
Honestly, I would have to say it was bit of a mixture both.
Since the leap, I’ve witnessed a new inconceivable life unfold rapidly before me, twisting and turning off into unpredictable directions previously thought unbelievable to my socially preconditioned mind. After packing my bags with what little of my life remained in December 2013, I’ve traveled to 12 beautiful countries and settled in Bali. I’ve lived here for one and half years.
I really never looked back…
Although exhilarating, this journeys had its fair share of terrifying moments too. But those moments of terror gifted me the powerful realizations it’s okay to have fear when you try something new, risky and courageous, and it’s completely natural to be afraid when you are challenging yourself by attempting something so boldly different, evolving and expansive.
Many months of my trip were spent petrified with fear. I mainly worried I’d lose all the money I had saved up since I had no viable source of income anymore, and after all I’d spent the last fourteen years of my life meticulously planning, plotting and designing its structure entirely around the prevention of the possibility of this nightmare even happening. I also was afraid I would lose everyone and everything else from my old life as I knew them before.
In one sense, my two greatest fears did come to pass…
I did end up losing everything. I hit rock bottom financially a little over a year ago, and I rarely if ever hear but a peep from the people I once knew involved in my old life. Life as I previously knew it the last 14 years of my adult life and the lavish lifestyle I once lived were POOF, GONE.
I’m not going to lie, reality hurt in the beginning, but I surrendered, accepted and let go. I’m not scared anymore.
I believe it’s when you’ve got nothing left is when true magic happens and champions rise. Champions are the people who don’t focus on failure, struggle and what they’ve lost. These people are unstoppable success stories because they accept their circumstances deciding to rise above them focusing on how there is EVERYTHING left to gain.
This was a choice I made. I trusted my intuition and boldly stepped out of the comfort zone. I knew I was risking it all and the reward is now my life is much more beautiful and definitely LIGHTER.
This SoulTrekk I voyaged on completely diminished my fear of the Unknown and the growing pains and challenges the Unknown brings.
Once you’ve lost everything, including your own sanity, is when you can courageously arise adorned in the scars of the journeyman like a true warrior wearing badges of honor, and proudly proclaim to both yourself and the world: “I AM NO LONGER AFRAID ANYMORE.”