Carving out one’s true calling in life does not always have to follow a logical path. In fact, it might provide great liberation when it doesn’t.
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Sitting under an oak tree, along a river or creek, or hiking up a mountainside, men for centuries have asked an age-old question: “What’s my purpose in life?”
Many men probably can see reflections of themselves in actor Leonard Nimoy’s Mr. Spock from the classic TV series “Star Trek.” Condolences, remembrances and tears from around the world have poured out since Nimoy died on Feb. 27 at age 83. Nimoy himself held fast to one of his character’s main themes: “Live long and prosper.”
How long does it take for a man to find his life’s meaning?
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The man himself was much more than the role, which called for logic, reason and balanced responses to many USS Enterprise problems. Nimoy was an actor, writer, poet, activist and noted photographer for “The Full Body Project” which helped full-figured women embrace their true essence instead of living in body shame.
A pretty standard response from Mr. Spock to situations posed by William Shatner’s Capt. James T. Kirk was that some idea or plan sounds “highly illogical.” This is just one of many classic lines from “Star Trek.” Kirk reacted out of his passion; Spock responded out of his calm, centered demeanor.
As men, finding our purpose in life – our quest for the Holy Grail, the key under your Mother’s pillow, our true North Star, etc. – takes on mythic traits.
Knowing what you want to do early in life is great, wonderful and splendid … if it is truly your heart’s desire. Many men fall into the trap of taking on the family business or family issues, and that – unconsciously – becomes their purpose.
How long does it take for a man to find his life’s meaning? Well, maybe years.
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Doing what you want in life matters just as much as anyone else’s dreams and desires.
Let me say that there is absolutely nothing holding a man back from his true calling except himself. It has happened to me, so I’m not preaching to the choir. I’m in the choir stand with a lot of other men.
…there is absolutely nothing holding a man back from his true calling except himself.
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Looking within and discovering a man’s own talents and abilities is such a wonderful trait to have. It may not follow the usual path of others. It might look different. Creative people are known to go against the trend. Those who might be considered “outliers” actually provide others with a backbone to get busy with their lives. The inner language might be “Well, if he can do it, then so can I.” And yes, you can do it. Men have a great tendency to live in their heads.
I understand there is a place for logic and reason. I embrace it. In fact, I wish more logic and reason had penetrated my cranium decades ago. Where I am today, though, is where I am and my path has certainly not been logical.
What about your path? Your mission? Each man, whether it is having a family, owning a business or becoming a great athlete, writer, musician or craftsman in a trade, has a deep purpose lying within his soul. A lot of times it gets covered up by ancient human mind games, limiting beliefs and emotions. “It’s not safe to do that,” “Don’t follow that road” or “Just stay where you are, sonny, and that will be fine” are possibly some words and phrases that keep men from bursting through into their own brilliance.
See, it doesn’t have to be logical. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if all men could just appreciate another man’s purpose in life, even if they did not internally agree with it? The “debating team” would take a siesta, grab a cold drink and sit by the beach in Cancun. This way, more men can step out of their own shadows and embrace the golden purpose laid out for them.
Talk about empowering! Talk about fully-alive men all around the world!
Each man … has a deep purpose lying within his soul.
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This all sounds highly illogical because emotions and feelings do get in the way. Men can say “screw feelings and watch what happens.” Look around. You will see many examples of this “screw it” purpose-filled life.
Consider this: Murky purposes filled with potholes of darkness have little light shining through them.
Tell me: Do you, as a man, have a purpose in life? Do you have a mission that lets you scream “Yes!” at the top of your lungs? Did you at one time, only to see it fade away?
I’ve done this. Had a purpose and mission for my life, was so damned sure of it that I “bet the farm,” rolled the dice and came up a loser at craps. Crap.
I choose to believe that the once-dead purpose laid a seed which can grow and thrive if nurtured with focused intention, care, love and passion. The same can happen for you, my man. What may have looked illogical at one time can turn into a logical path at the snap of your fingers.
Remember Lao-Tzu’s wisdom: “The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.”
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P.S.: If you have not seen this collection of lines delivered by Nimoy as Mr. Spock, then spend a few minutes, enjoy, remember and listen to them. As Mr. Spock, and Leonard Nimoy himself, said for years, may we always “live long and prosper.”
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Photo: AP/File