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Okay, so your kid is being a rebel. Instead of eating the healthy, homemade dinner, he now wants a bowl of M&M’s? Or he is refusing to do his homework and insists on watching television till late into the night? With teenagers, it is worse. They do not like to do what they are told! They do things their way and do not seem to mind if it affects their school and education. This makes it very hard to not lose your marbles and stay calm. But, do keep calm as here are six tips that will save the day.
1. Walk away
This is one of the best ways to avoid yelling or worse, hitting your kids. When the situation gets heated and you know you’re losing it, walk away. Ask your husband or wife to fill in and deal with the situation. This works in both ways because your child will also know how angry that the certain thing made you and when the other parent steps in, all the stubbornness they displayed before will go down a notch.
2. Talk to your kids
When your kids are being unreasonable, the last thing they want to listen to is anything that you say. When they are throwing a fit or a tantrum, stay away till they have calmed down. Once they are done with whatever yelling they have done, explain to them why their behavior was bad. Explain what is acceptable and what is not. This might not have an immediate effect but over time, it helps mold the kid’s behavior.
3. Look into the aftermath
Remember that yelling at or spanking your kid, however mad they make you, will only scar them. Your kids might be thinking that you are establishing an authority on them and they will either try to fight back or be bitter about it. It is harmful either way and this alone should be enough to make you stop. When you think you are about to lose it, think about the consequences and take a deep breath and talk to your kid with a level head.
4. Use alternatives
When your kid is being a rebel, yelling at them to get the work done may seem like the easiest option. What if we say that you can make your kids behave without using force? For instance, distract them by talking about their favorite cartoon. You could also write their misbehavior on a paper and put it in a box, read them aloud to your kid at the end of the month. This will make your child realize that they’re behaving badly and they will push themselves to correct it.
5. Know the source
When your kid is acting out, it is mostly because they think it is cool to defy you (something that they’ve picked from friends or from TV). Or maybe it is because you are being an authoritative parent! So instead of getting worked up and losing your temper, try asking them if something is wrong in a soft tone. And ask yourself if you’re too overbearing. If the behavior continues, talk to his/her teachers about it and check if they’re in good company.
6. Well, they’re Kids
They will obviously behave like kids. They want to play and jump around and not wear their shoes even if you are getting late. It is their duty to frustrate you and push your buttons. So look at things in their perspective. Sometimes when they insist that they want to eat donuts in bed, maybe you should just join them! We suggest you also try different Aways to have fun and bond with our kids, which will enable them to look at things from your POV sometimes!
Also, please remember children grow up learning a lot from their parents and elders. If you frequently curse around your children or have loud arguments with your spouse, it will definitely have a negative impact on them. As they say, prevention is better than cure. So be cautious about your behavior first, have patience, and the rest will be sorted!
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Photo courtesy Unsplash.