If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.
Have you ever seen the 1995 film, “Leaving Las Vegas” with Nicolas Cage and Elisabeth Shue? If not, it’s quite…something.
Though definitely not a comedy, there is one funny scene near the beginning in which the character played by Nicolas Cage goes on a booze shopping spree, complete with a grocery cart.
Here’s the link to the 23-second clip on You Tube.
A couple of weeks ago, I donned my face mask and headed into my local liquor store to load up on booze. I don’t think I’ve ever used a shopping cart in a liquor store before—but desperate times call for desperate measures.
Not that I’m drinking copious amounts during this pandemic…rather, I just go to the liquor store far less often. So I figure when I do go, I may as well load up.
So there I am afterwards…in my mask, baseball cap and sunglasses, pushing my grocery cart of booze down the street (in a small town full of seniors, I might add) while cheerfully whistling a tune (rather Nicholas Cage-like).
When I arrive at my car, I think to myself: “Oh…I’ll take a selfie of me and my grocery cart!” As perhaps you can imagine, this took a bit of maneuvering, this way and that, to get just the right shot.
When I was finished making a fool of myself outside the liquor store, I stood up properly and turned around…only to see a good-looking guy in the line-up, doubled over, laughing at me.
“I wish I had MY phone!” he yells. “I’d have taken a photo of you trying to take your own photo.”
Now, a wise woman would have graciously let it go at this. But not me. I whipped off my mask and (perhaps overly excited at the prospect of a conversation with a real live person) yelled back at him: “Have you seen Leaving Las Vegas?”
He thinks a moment, then yells back at me: “Yes!”
“That’s me!” I yell, oddly proud as a peacock, “I’m using a grocery cart to buy booze!
Remember that scene in the movie?!”
“Yes!” he yells back.
We both burst out laughing then I get in my car and carry on my merry way.
Yes, folks…now we know why I am still single.
Previously Published on Pink Gazelle