Here’s a way to take your intimate encounters to a whole new level and in the process get in touch with a very important part of who you are.
Most people accept the fact that every human being has elements of both masculine and feminine regardless of gender. It is also fairly safe to say that most men don’t encourage their feminine side to emerge during love-making. As a result, they are missing out in an extraordinarily powerful way to enhance their intimate experiences with their partner.
Another Kind of Spiritual Intimacy
In last week’s post, we explored how intimate partners can exchange sexual energy without touching by just being fully present and breathing in a synchronized way. I refer to any exchange of energy between two people as “Spiritual Intimacy” since it involves a connection beyond the physical and emotional realms.
Another powerful and very exciting way to exchange this kind of energy is through a process I call “gender energy swapping.” In essence, this involves the spontaneous switching of gender energy between partners when making love. I will get into how this is done shortly, after we explore why so many men may find it difficult at first to access this sublime means of enhancing intimacy with their partner.
“Don’t Touch Me There!”
First let me state that I am an average heterosexual male who happens to have a fairly strong feminine side. One of the things my female partner loves to do is caress, kiss and lick my nipples that frankly sends me to the moon. Never having had a discussion with other men about whether they liked having their nipples touched, I thought my response was typical. How wrong I was. In our culture men, far more than women, tend to be shy about allowing their opposite gender side to emerge – either because it may be viewed as a sign of weakness or homosexual tendencies.
From my personal point of view I see my feminine side as one of my biggest strengths as a man. It balances out my much more aggressive male side and allows me to enjoy more subtle, nuanced experiences. And likewise, while I fully appreciate the beauty of the male form, it holds no sexual interest for me at all.
Gender Energy Swapping Made Easy
So assuming that both you and your partner are comfortable allowing your respective opposite gender energies to emerge, the process of incorporating this into your lovemaking is quite straightforward. Here’s how it works for us.
Like most lovers, we will spontaneously take turns to be “on top”. This becomes our cue as to who is manifesting masculine sexual energy (the one on top, giving) and feminine energy (the one on the bottom, receiving). Now this next part may seem weird but hang in there with me and just be open to the possibilities this can provide for you and your partner.
When my partner is on top, I often imagine that I am the “woman” receiving her thrusts as if she were the “man”. Similarly, she imagines being the man thrusting into me as the woman. What is so incredible about this is if you truly allow those energies to emerge, the experience goes far beyond just imagination. When she and I are in synch this way I feel as if I really am the woman and can feel my partner’s penis inside me. At the same time, she really feels as if she has a penis that is penetrating me. We will typically switch our gender energy polarity at least a half-dozen times during a typical lovemaking session. It is incredibly powerful and exciting for both of us and greatly enhances our lovemaking overall.
Fostering Gender Empathy
Something else happens for my partner and me when we allow this kind of freedom of expression during our intimate sessions. We each become much more in tune with what it is truly like, sexually speaking, being the other gender. This exchange provides each of us with a context in which to fully appreciate what each of us has to give to the other, both as a man and woman. And it also provides us with a way to deeply appreciate our respective feminine and masculine sides –both very much needed to live as a fully expressed whole human being.
If you are a man reading this I highly encourage you to explore allowing your full feminine side emerge during your lovemaking and watch what it does for your partner. Likewise, if you are a woman, wait until you see how excited your man gets when you let your inner masculine show its full strength –trust me on this one.