I took a break writing for The Good Men Project to gaze out my kitchen window for awhile. To my delight I spotted a hummingbird coming into view. It was not attracted by the color of a nectar rich flower. It was a brightly colored clothespin that brought the bird my way.
The delicate bird hovered to probe the clothespin from every angle. It searched on the clothes line for a rest. Again and again, it tried to find the sweetness behind the color. It spent more time with me than any other hummingbird ever has. I am thinking of getting some more clothespins. I think I would rather store them out of sight when not in use.
This encounter got me thinking about how often men are drawn away from natural goodness. The more I thought, the worse I felt. Here is a short list:
Men, like hummingbirds, naturally pay attention to signs of something nearby that is sweet to eat. A little sweetness can go a long way. Concentrated sweetness can be very attractive and play a primary role in many painful and deadly diseases. Those who profit from the sale of food and drink know this and they don’t care. Same goes for salt and fat. Caffeine plays with men who have difficulty regulating anxiety. Energy drinks are very popular.
Men naturally go for women who may be interested in sex. This attractive status is not easy to discern naturally. Naturally, men look for a slight blush in the cheeks, a widening of the eyes, when it comes to sexual receptivity. Many women are sold on the idea that cheeks and eyes are a good place for cosmetics. Many men are sold on the bright clothespin of pornography.
Men naturally go for women who have a good likelihood of being fertile. They naturally, look for things that define sexual maturity and help rule out old age. Fortunes continue to be made selling women on products and services that make them look old enough…but not too old.
The pleasure centers of the male brain are naturally primed to remember where the good food is. They are primed to know where the love is as well. This priming is fucked with for profit constantly.
Think of the goods and services that use this priming to get a man to spend time sitting next to a clothespin.
What is a man to do? There is no escaping it.
Here is how you try. Spend more time with all of your senses, feeling the natural. Perceive your partner in all of her natural beauty. Let her know that your love for her base can reassure her to play with her base, using whatever artistry she chooses.
Know that there is nothing more attractive than love, nothing more real. Don’t settle for any limitations. Know that female brains aren’t that much different. Seek the natural high.
Photo credit: Getty Images