It’s been seven weeks since I first lay eyes on the person I am falling in love with. When going to a mental clinic, never did I ever imagine that love can bloom anywhere.
I was ready to heal myself but still felt numb to the world until this person came along and showed me that loving yourself is the first important thing we should all do to get anywhere in life.
Here is how I found love in a mental clinic because:
“Love can happen anytime anywhere. Only true love happens somewhere once.” — Yugen Norbu
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1. Love yourself first
“You need to know that you’re enough. You are complete with or without a partner. You are enough just as you are.” — Meghan Markle
The first lesson I learned when falling in love in a mental clinic is how we should love ourselves first. You see, my guy has a massive lack of self-love, and it hurts to see this happen to such a loving, caring person.
He doesn’t think he has positive attributes about himself and tends to always puts himself down. Does this ring a bell? These are signs of depression, and if your partner is suffering too, I have written a post about how to deal with a depressed partner:
Your Partner Has Depression. Here’s How to Nurture Your Relationship
Anyway, back to the story. When falling in love with this guy, I realised the lack of self-confidence and love he had for himself. I then soon realised that he wouldn’t be able to love me back as I love him… at least not yet.
We discussed this topic out in the open together. He even admitted he doesn’t have the capability to love someone due to his hollowness inside that he is unfortunately experiencing. Maybe some people would run away after someone telling them that, but I was open and ready to take it on.
Instead of making him love me, I want to help him love himself. Of course, I know this is a personal task at hand which only the person can do themselves, but my selfless love will let him follow the right path and hopefully, the love that I show him can lead him to show the love himself that he deserves.
All I can do is accept and enjoy, which is the second lesson I learned how I found love in a mental clinic:
2. Acceptance is key
“Acceptance is the key to be truly free” — Katy Perry
Love can blossom anywhere. Be it a prison, mental clinic, or on holiday, all it requires is two people who understand each other well! However, when finding love in an unusual place, acceptance must be key in accepting the other person for who they are and accepting the situation they are in and that it won’t always be this way.
For example, during my mental clinic stay, the days would be scheduled around daytime therapy and walks in the woods with my guy. The days were simple, laid back, blissful. It was only when I was really in the moment when I realized how lucky we were to be living such an experience together and that it would not always be this way.
This realization didn’t ruin the moments for me but heightened the intensity of them instead. Rather, I was more glad and grateful for the times we could sit in a treehouse and snuggle and talk about anything and everything carefree. It felt like it was meant to be.
Another key element in love blossoming in the mental clinic was accepting him for who he was. I think I did a pretty good job of this early on because I got to see his “dark side” quite early on. He wasn’t afraid to show it to me, and I wasn’t afraid to handle it with care and charisma. Instead, I accepted him for who he was because that’s what love is, right?
3. Let things come and go
“Let things come and go. The things that are meant to stay will stay.” — Anonymous
The last lesson on how I found love in a mental clinic is all about awareness and mindfulness. When living in the present moment, you allow things to come and go. This was so important during my relationship in the mental clinic because emotions were high. The thing is, you never know what mood you’ll be in during your stay because of the symptoms you are facing and the health issues.
There would be days when my anxiety would be skyrocketing, and my guy’s depression would be too. We would talk about how we feel and come to some conclusions about the way we want to feel. Other days, we would have to let the feelings linger a bit longer, and I’d try my best to be funny, whacky me to get our spirits up.
You see, things come and go, and the more you start to accept this, the easier it is to flow with life. I always remind myself of what I am grateful for before starting to worry my head off about things that I can’t help. Overthinking kills joy. So what is it that you’re not letting flow in your relationship? Let things come; let things go.
In conclusion
I do believe love can blossom anywhere. I didn’t use to be such a hopeless romantic person, but ever since falling in love in a mental clinic, I can say that anything is possible when love is present, including healing. Thanks for reading, and I hope these lessons may help you in your path of love, no matter where it is.
So here are the three lessons I learned on how I found love in a mental clinic:
- Love yourself first
- Acceptance is key
- Let things come and go.
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This post was previously published on Medium.
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