I have been staying out of the political fray. I have my own opinions about our country and the leadership we need in America, and I have chosen not to write about them or join in any social media buzz. What I read and see out there is so acidic, so polarizing, at times so juvenile, and so below what I believe we represent as a country and people that I have found it difficult to engage.
However, something so ugly has just happened that, as a man in good conscience, I can’t remain silent. Throughout this campaign season I have been amazed at what Donald Trump has said and even more incredulous of the statements made by some of his supporters. Still, it has always been my belief that common sense would prevail.
I’m speaking out now, not only about Donald Trump the Republican candidate for President, but more importantly Donald Trump the man. I want to address how I as a man feel about who Donald Trump is, and what he represents in our country. I want to discuss how we, as men, should be concerned.
Growing As a Man Is a Journey
I have found navigating life as a conscious man takes some doing. On one side I have privilege and power because of my gender. I don’t face discrimination or oppression as say, women do. On the other hand, being a man, being masculine, is fraught with stereotypes, expectations, mixed messages, uncertainties, and isolation.
I’m not complaining. I love my intentional journey for discovery of my authentic masculinity. One that I’ve been experiencing over the course of more than 10 years. And it is because of this journey that I say, Donald Trump does not represent the kind of men or masculinity needed in today’s world and for our country.
As a man, his words and actions do not represent the character qualities of leadership I look for in another man. The most recent reveal on sound and video shows a history of behavior for Donald Trump has not changed over the last 10 years. His way of showing up as a man, as seen over these last 18 months, oppresses women, exploits the weak and disadvantaged, and seeks only to nurture an infantile ego. I believe Donald Trump still has work to do around his level of consciousness of people and the world around him.
Hey look, no man is perfect. What sets Donald Trump apart from most of us men who are trying to get our shit together is his refusal…or possible inability?…to grow and develop into a conscious man of the 21st century. I can say this based on the inflammatory language he uses and behaviors he exhibits today, that apparently are still very similar to his language and behavior more than 10 years ago.
Giving Donald Trump a Pass Slams Women
I’m calling out men in this country who are giving the Donald a “pass” on his most recent reveal of talk and behavior. The fact that what he said was over 10 years ago doesn’t warrant the pass men. His words and behaviors over the last 18 months show the same disrespect and unconsciousness of women, as well as other groups in this country.
Men, be accountable to your wives, daughters, sisters and mothers. Donald Trumpdoesn’t get a pass, and he sure as hell shouldn’t be getting a like on Facebook. It is time to show true masculinity and stand up for the women in your lives against a misogynist. That looks like speaking out and denouncing Donald Trump’s words and behavior. And in case you forgot his words, here they are.
“I did try and fuck her” “I moved on her like a bitch, but I couldn’t get there. And she was married”
Men, this is rape culture talk. To “move in on someone” doesn’t suggest an invitation or mutual consent. He degrades the humanity of this woman and objectifies her by referring to “her like a bitch”. Donald Trump believes he, as a man, has the right to “try and fuck her” even though uninvited, and even though this woman was married.
Would you want your wife to be subject to advances and behaviors by men likeDonald Trump? Think about it. Is rape culture what we as men want to teach our sons is appropriate behavior with women? What is our responsibility here men? We do have one.
More of Donald Trump’s words. “And when you’re a star they let you do it” “You can do anything.” “Grab them by the pussy” “You can do anything.”
What is so disturbing to me in Donald Trump’s comments is that he believes he can do anything because of who he is. I see no sense of boundaries this man has for himself. I’m asking you men, what do you see?
Would you want your daughter left in a room alone with a man like Donald Trump? Is this a man who creates a safer world for women, or for any of us? How then can we support him in his bid for leadership of our country?
What message are we sending to our daughters if we do support him? Do we tell them it’s ok if men grab your pussy because we can? Is that the kind of men and father’s we are?
I always thought Donald Trump and his outrageous character would find its own way back to unimportance within the American conversation. It hasn’t. What he has done is awakened my own conscience of standing and being present as a man in this country. He has awakened my responsibilities to not only the women in my life, but to the women in this country.
Men, it is time for us to call Donald Trump out. This is not about politics. This is about being a man and standing for a masculinity that rejects oppression and violence. I’ve heard it said “it takes a man to sharpen another man”. I interpret that to mean it takes a man to help another man grow fully in his own masculinity. It takes men to awaken other men.
It is time men to send Donald Trump our wake-up call.
Originally Published on Huffington Post