His wife gushes about another man… ALL THE TIME. Allana Pratt Intimacy Expert, doesn’t think it’s all in his head…
Question: My wife is in love with another man and doesn’t even know it! Any time she talks about him (which is all the time) she gushes and gets so excited. She blushed if I tease her about it and says it’s all in my head and I am just jealous. What do I do?
Answer: Love I have to be honest… that’s what fierce love would do, yes? It seems your question is at the level of reaction, of effect… not a question that’s grounded or pointing to the cause of what’s going on. I get that her behavior is unkind for SURE! And yet your question seems tit for tat, and dramatic rather than a deep profound inquiry into what the hell happened to cause this in the first place?
How about… What did I do, or didn’t do, that led to this situation? Where did I cop the ball, takes her for granted? Where did I not speak my truth and saw this coming years ago? Where am I not taking charge of my marriage in a way that cultivates such a strong foundation and openness of communication that we could talk about what’s REALLY going on under the surface?
It seems it’s not about this guy… it seems it’s about what’s missing in your relationship. It seems like two wounded parts of your souls rubbing up against one another desiring to feel enough, feel wanted, feel safe, feel home.
Yes? Watch the video for more profound questions you could ask, for the quality of question is connected to the quality of answer you’ll find, and thus the quality of solution you’ll create together.
Just like when someone says, Why am I so fat? That’s so strewn with judgment that we don’t get anywhere. Yet if they ask, What would it take for me to have a healthy lean body that feels great? THEN the path appears, yes?
Honestly your marriage sounds on the brink of disaster if you don’t get this hole in your foundation plugged up and mended. I recommend contacting my [email protected] and book a strategy session. I’m not a cookie cutter therapist here to waste your time for the next year. I am a proven sought after coach and healer who creates profound priceless lasting results with great care and efficiency. It’s my privilege and honor. And my gift. And it would be my pleasure to guide, heal and transform your relationship potentially into the strongest and most fulfilling it’s EVER been. What’s RIGHT about this is that we’re being shown that something is off. Let’s not just fix it. Let’s evolve you both into the fullest glory of partnership possible, yes?
Great love, Allana
p.s. For those just getting to know me, men go to www.GetHerToSayYes.com for my complementary report and video series and ladies, you may enjoy my Book in 3rd edition, www.HowToBeAndStaySexy.com being exactly who you are.
Photo: www.BigStock.com
“This really is a very morbid website. I came across this site a month or two ago, looking for good dating info and constructive criticism. But the majority of this stuff is either finger wagging or shaming in one way or another to men.” ———————– Ok, so what are ya gonna do about it? The guy has a wife that loves another guy, what is he going to do about it? Guys, I understand the frustration, but sometimes its also visceral, and we simply react as I’m seeing here. I personally don’t care about fault or implied fault. I’m so… Read more »
Wow, you’re a little off the rails tonight (in a good way), and I chuckled to myself a number of times reading that. Keep being awesome. I imagine your wife is also pretty awesome, and lucky (but also worthy) to have you. Hope you’re enjoying your weekend. 😀
How is it possible that in every case, in every incident, NO MATTER WHAT it is ALWAYS the mans fault?
How is that possible???
Did he not say that SHE was the one who was on the verge of cheating and magically, it’s the mans fault?
The author is a female, who would have guessed that?
This is a truly pathetic piece.. I have never been a fan of Allana Pratt….There is a lot of her that comes across as being downright FAKE. “It seems it’s not about this guy… it seems it’s about what’s missing in your relationship. It seems like two wounded parts of your souls rubbing up against one another desiring to feel enough, feel wanted, feel safe, feel home.” OK. Let’s assume that Allana is correct in her assessment. Why does HE have to change to make HER happy? This is what turns me off with so many women today. We as… Read more »
I had a thought, actually about this poor guy’s situation. Have there ever been any studies done, asking a question like “how much did you know about the person your significant other cheated on you with?” I’d love to know, because I know that, at least for guys I’ve talked to, any time they were thinking of cheating on their wife/gf with another woman, they said as little as possible about the other woman, seriously downplaying their interest in her, to the point of even offering reasons why they *don’t* think she’s attractive, and would never even consider it. Isn’t… Read more »
Yeah, just another of those ” It’s all your fault guy, let’s see how we can ‘Fix’ you, you know, so you’ll be more the ‘Man’ she craves and you won’t force the poor thing to find it somewhere else! Just remember, when she cheats, IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT!!!
This really is a very morbid website. I came across this site a month or two ago, looking for good dating info and constructive criticism. But the majority of this stuff is either finger wagging or shaming in one way or another to men. This article is just a great example. How on earth do you get statements like, “And yet your question seems tit for tat, and dramatic rather than a deep profound inquiry into what the hell happened to cause this in the first place?” I kept rereading the guys question and issue…..tit for tat? Dramatic? You gotta… Read more »
**wife’s fault
This really is a very morbid website. I came across this site a month or two ago, looking for good dating info and constructive criticism. But the majority of this stuff is either finger wagging or shaming in one way or another to men.
Yes, I agree.
Angelguy
Women will monkey branch, pure – plain – simple. Your mistake was believing you found one that won’t.
Better luck next time; but remember when you play the game – the house always wins, despite the errant jackpot or two.
Monkey analogies. Sweet. You do realize that in the monkey social structure, the lead male monkey mates with several female monkeys at a time, can be aggressive and will even kill off-spring from other males or if it’s own off-spring is sick right? So do you honestly what to be comparing men or women to monkeys?
So…it’s HIS fault??? Smh…
I know, right? It couldn’t possibly be that he has done nothing wrong and that his wife just checked out of the marriage one her own. Nah…it’s gotta be the MAN’s fault!
I agree MJ. It’s not his fault. Why can’t women be held responsible for their own behavior?! Face it: Women love novelty and variety more than they love men. Why do men have to constantly be doing something all of the time in order to have value? As soon as a woman feels bored or loses connection she looks elsewhere. Women are looking to scale up when they can and then blame YOU for it! NO NO NO! How can I better make up for the damage???? This guy needs to LEAVE HER. PERIOD. Her behavior is not supportive at… Read more »
Oh, holy crap. Should I even comment on this? Man… “your question seems tit for tat, and dramatic rather than a deep profound inquiry” Dramatic? Tit for tat? I had to re-read it several times, because I thought maybe I was losing my reading comprehensions skills. “What do I do?”, preceded by a concise description of what’s happening seems as level-headed and far from dramatic as anything I’ve ever read. Not to mention, about as un-accusatory as anyone could reasonably be in the situation. So immediately, it falls on him to figure out what he did wrong, to allow this… Read more »
No. You’re not alone. Wtf!!! I read this because it happened to me. For me, it was inevitably an early warning sign I failed to act on. I trusted my wife. I gave her the benefit of the doubt. I thought that she probably had a small crush. I got that. I’ve had small crushes. We even talked about it many times. Thought it was actually a healthy thing. Especially to be able to talk about it and be honest about it with your significant other! Never acted on them because you know, marriage!!!!!! I let her talk about her… Read more »
I was also thinking that. Sure makes me not want to go to her for relationship advice. She’ll just tell you it’s your fault and criticize for thinking the way you do. And it’s always the man’s fault. A woman cheats on a man and it’s always made out to be his fault for not giving her enough attention, love, etc. A man cheats on a woman and he’s just an asshole who is only concerned about himself. Woman cheats – her man’s fault. Man cheats – his own fault. I’ve heard that on a number of relationship articles here… Read more »
Nice ad for your services
RLH
i thought the same thing by the way.