It took this man 12 years to figure out why he was 170 pounds overweight, stuck in a job he hated, and living a miserable life.
For 12 years I let fear hold me back. I was afraid of change, I was afraid of taking action. I let fear talk me out of making some big changes that I wanted to make in my life. After 12 years of letting fear win, I said enough! I lost 170 pounds, and moved our family from Milwaukee, Wisconsin to Maui, Hawaii.
At the end of 2012, I was able to quit a job I had hated for 12 years for my dream business. Even when this business generated enough income to support my family, I still gave into fear. I was afraid I wasn’t a good enough writer, I was afraid I didn’t have any “credentials,” so I didn’t go after bigger opportunities. I was afraid I didn’t have anything to teach, or that people wouldn’t take me seriously. I was afraid of my own shadow!
I know there are men reading this that can relate. We let our fear keep us from going after the bigger opportunities in our life. Fear is the number reason many guys don’t chase, or make big dreams their reality. If you can’t get over those fears, you’ll never make your dream your reality.
Fear is usually stupid
Most of the time we’re afraid of things we don’t really need to be afraid of. If you try to do something and it doesn’t work out, so what? Life still continues on, and more than likely that isn’t going to be the only opportunity that you have.
Most fears are usually over dumb things that can be quickly dismissed if we step back from the situation. Yes, there are some valid concerns, but not really anything you need to be afraid of.
Stop letting fear win. Realize that everyone fails, even the “greats.” The people who are successful in life have determined that no matter how many times they fall, they’re going to get back up! Be that person.
Nothing is impossible
It may be scary, and it may be outside of your comfort zone to chase big dreams, but realize all of your dreams are possible. They may not happen overnight, and it’s going to take some hard work, but you can do it.
We live in an incredible time with amazing opportunities all around us. Everything you need to make your dream a reality is right in front of you. We have amazing technology that makes this all possible, especially if you have an online dream.
You may not realize it, but fear may be buried deep inside. You have to get real with yourself. Verbalize that fear and start working on getting over it. One of the best things I did to deal with my fear was connect with an amazing group of friends. They were there for me as I chased huge life changes, and are the main reason my fear didn’t win.
If you don’t have a group like that, you need to create one or join an existing group. That support will push you past your fear, and help you realize your true potential. My hope is that many men make their dreams a reality by the end of next year.
I wrote an article the other day for the Huffington Post. As expected, there were many comments. The one comment you see, and one that we here a lot from people in general, is “it’s only been eight months since they moved to Hawaii, I hope it works out for them.”
My first response is ME TOO! However, what if it doesn’t? What if we crash and burn, and have to move back to Wisconsin? My answer is SO WHAT! If it doesn’t work out, at least we’ll come to the end of my life with NO regrets. Years later we’ll tell our grand children about the time grandma and grandpa moved to Hawaii, and we’ll all have a good laugh.
Too often we let the fear of failure hold us back from living an amazing life, and most of the time it’s not justified. If your dream is to be a bull fighter, that’s one thing, but if your dream is a better job, move to a new place, lose weight and so on, what’s the worse that could happen?
So what if you fall flat on your face, get back up and keep pushing forward. The worst thing you can do is let fear or the negative voices of others keep you from your dreams. My father died suddenly with regret in his heart, and he begged me not to do the same.
If Hawaii doesn’t work out we’ll do what we have to do, but we won’t have the regret of an unfilled dream in our heart. Don’t let the people who say “I hope it works out” keep you from living the life that they will only dream about living. Chase that dream and die empty.
A version of this article originally appeared on KimanziConstable.com
Are you letting fear keep you from an amazing life?
Photo: Flickr/ Daniel Peckham