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This Call for Submissions was inspired by a conversation surrounding the death of Chris Cornell. Good Men Project Contributor Andy Grant wrote: “I bet it is painful for anyone whose identity is tied to their job or role. And when you are seen by the public AS that job or role – even more difficult to be ‘just’ you.”
Andy’s comment reminded me of my own identity issues: first as a new empty nester when my son graduated from high school and moved away to college when I was only 35 years old; and second, when I went from a caregiver to needing care after a complicated injury.
When a man’s occupation is a big part of his identity, he seems to feel (as some have expressed to me and others I have observed) fear and anxiety if his role is at risk of being eliminated. My observation has been that this is usually unrelated to the fear of not being able to provide for dependents. Instead, this fear is about losing one’s identity and, perhaps, having to redefine oneself or perish. Is it the same for all genders or is there a stronger connection to masculinity? My experience from the perspective of a woman was, in fact, one of having to redefine myself or be crushed by the misery of not being who I thought I was.
A friend of mine is a high school football coach. He’s a compassionate man who cares about his student players on and off the field. His concern for the evidence of chronic traumatic encephalopathy(CTE) has him conflicted: for the safety of his kids, for the sport, and for his career as a coach. In discussing it with him as gently as I could, it seemed clear to me that his very identity is so interconnected with football that the threat of losing the sport to CTE was close to a death sentence for him, personally.
What about when a man retires? Does depression ensue? Why is the transition from work to retirement often so challenging?
I am a mere student of Psychology and student of life. I am interested in the perspective of those of you who understand this subject of personal identity and career or other role. If you are an expert in the field, tell us all about this subject. If you are a man who has experienced the threat of losing a career that has (or did) defined you, tell us your story! Click the big red box below to submit!
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Here are more ways to become a part of The Good Men Project community:
Request to join our private Facebook Group for Writers—it’s like our virtual newsroom where you connect with editors and other writers about issues and ideas.
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Are you stuck on what to write? Sign up for our Writing Prompts emails, you’ll get ideas directly from our editors every Monday and Thursday. If you already have a final draft, then click below to send your post through our submission system.
If you are already working with an editor at GMP, please be sure to name that person. If you are not currently working with a GMP editor, one will be assigned to you.
Join our exclusive weekly “Call with the Publisher” — where community members are encouraged to discuss the issues of the week, get story ideas, meet other members and get known for their ideas? To get the call-in information, either join as a member or wait until you get a post published with us. Here are some examples of what we talk about on the calls.
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However, you engage with The Good Men Project—you can help lead this conversation about the changing roles of men in the 21st century. Join us!
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Photo credit: Getty Images
As an employee you are employed to solve problems that arise in an organization. The more problems you solved the higher and bigger ahead to solved by means of promotion to higher official duties and responsibilities. But doing one particular job always it become so bored and uninterested to an employee. I always recommend more training and enlarging employees duties so as bring in new innovation and ideals for productivity and growth.
People are tied up too much in who they were in their jobs. Police officers, military personnel, politicians, and business people are excellent examples. In addition, our bosses don’t give us time to enjoy time with ourselves and our loved to the point that our jobs and careers consume our entire life and then throw us away when they no longer need us.