Hector Ray shares a powerful principle about the words you speak.
If you could just listen to yourself from time to time, you may notice that one reason you are not more attractive to others has to do with how you are speaking. When I say attractive, I am not talking about your physical features. I am referring to your expressions or the words you are using.
Lately, I am noticing this more in the younger generation, around ten to thirty years old. Language could be interpreted as who you are and what you will be. Imagine people already determining who you are by how you speak when they don’t even know you. This could be in the grocery store, “I am just saying.” This eventually affects your opportunities and relationships. For example, using foul language to express yourself will eventually only attract people that use that same language. If our goal is to become more attractive to others and to attract the good things that are waiting for us, it might just be a good idea to make some simple adjustments in our language.
The minute we wake up and prepare ourselves for our day, our emotions, our attitude, our daily decisions, believe it or not, will be determined by our language. It will even determine the kind of day we will have. It may not be noticeable right way, but years will go by and you will be asking yourself, “What did I neglect that was easy, that I avoided?” Think about this: if the language we use will attract what is best for us, why not work on this, and improve upon the way we express ourselves? Approach the situation by knowing what and how you will say something.
By the way, we can practice this. Most likely in the next minute or two, you will be speaking to someone. One way that I have improved my language is by reading more—of course, reading positive material that can make us better.
It’s amazing to me how people don’t like read, thereby limiting or stifling their language. If you read business materials, your business language will improve. If you read inspirational materials, you will not only inspire yourself, but others around you. In my opinion, that is the ultimate language we need to work on.
The most practical way to rehearse your future is to make someone else better! We have numerous opportunities to make someone else better and the simplest way is to use the right language. The old adage, “It’s not what we say, it’s how we say it, that will make the difference” is at the center of what this article is about.
When we practice or when we are conscious of this, the right words will flow effortlessly. I have been in numerous situations both personally and professionally where I’ve been totally convinced that my language has allowed me to influence people’s beliefs, actions and thoughts. Isn’t this great—when you are interested in improving your language, you will be able to get others to believe in what you are saying! This is awesome for relationships—whether they are personal or professional.
Sometimes the subtle difference in our language can make a major difference in our future. It can be as simple as replacing one word or expression with another, such as: “Why are you always late?” vs ‘I need to understand why you can’t make it on time.” It’s consciously making a decision to quit saying what you don’t want and to start saying what you do want. Change your language, change your life, and even help others by being the one making the adjustment.
When your language is aligned with what you really want to say, then your mind automatically shifts your thoughts to pull you in the right direction. Many times, a mere adjustment in the words or vocabulary you use will send the right signals as to who you are. Your attitude and your philosophy are often determined by what comes out of your mouth.
We don’t want to leave this to chance. We can work on all of this, and it’s all available to each one us if we are interested in seeking it out. Language could be the difference of where you will live, what you will drive, and even who you will meet now and in the future. It is easy to stumble through a lifetime and not learn some of these simplicities, but the great thing about this, is that no one owns this—it’s available to anyone.
I am always trying to figure out how I (we) can become better than we used to be. If I were to prescribe how to become more attractive to others, I would suggest it’s our language. It can be the difference in where our future lies. Many times it’s not about perfection but about progression.
Change your language, change your life. Try it—it’s available to anyone who is interested.
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