I was out in Boston this past Labor Day weekend when I ran into a large group of 30-something women. Most were single and the ever popular question of “why can’t we meet any good men?” came up. Rather than share these tips with just a few women, I thought I’d share them with you as well.
Don’t always go out with a large group of women
Many men can’t deal with a group of four or more girls. Heck, we can barely gain the courage to approach two of you. When you are gathered like a herd of wildebeests, we can’t even fathom what to do. Do you know who will approach you, though?
Yes, you guessed it, the alpha stud or the pickup artist. Who needs that?
Break away temporarily
If you are part of a large group, break away and be single for 20 minutes or so. I know it sounds scary, but you are a big girl and your friends are right over there. Make it a game. Alternatively, you can go out earlier in the evening, alone, an hour or so before your friends show up. This way, guys are much more inclined to walk up and say “Hi”.
Provide space
Guys need a home base. It is difficult for a man to talk to you if there is no space for him to safely approach. Try to provide a space for a guy to stand or sit beside you so he doesn’t get bumped in the crowd.
Body language
Show men that you are available. Look at a man and smile. Square your shoulders away from your friends, toward the room. Act happy. Put down the headphones. If you are at the beach jamming out all day long, a man will not walk up and say hi. Bring a radio which doesn’t require headphones instead or take breaks from your headphones.
Go to him
It’s okay to approach a man. We love it when you do. At least get closer to us so we can approach you. A man will not walk across the entire room just to get shot down so his friends can laugh at him. Try taking the long way to the ladies room – show him a smile on the way.
Opportunity knocks
Don’t compartmentalize your social life into the weekends. Eat at different places during your lunch break. If you see a cute guy on an elevator, jump on! He doesn’t know where you’re going. If you go the beach, look for and strategically sit down next to him. I bet you can meet 5 more men than you are now meeting if you notice all of the opportunities.
Get away from the bar scene
If you only hang out at bars, you are destined for failure. You are swimming with the sharks. Instead, pick better venues, like wine tastings or charities. Pick Up Artists don’t hang out in these places and you will instantly have a topic for conversation.
Try these 7 tips and I will guarantee that you will meet more quality men. Remember, your future guy might be standing next to you right now!
Previously published on Who Holds the Cards Now
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