And what we can do to prevent future violence.
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Once again we are shocked, sickened, and frightened as we come to grips with another mass killing. We want to do something to feel safe again and often we are told we must “fight fire with fire.” One headline read: France vows to punish ISIS for fatal Paris attacks. We can all empathize with those who were killed and feel supportive of the citizens of Paris. We can also recognize the rage we feel towards those who are responsible for the killings.
But in order to prevent future acts of mass violence, we have to better understand who did the killing and why. There are no simple answers and, as always, it will take time to get all the facts about what went on. But here are some things we do know:
Those who did the killing were young men.
Each of the men had lost the will to live.
According to a November 16, 2015 article in NY Magazine “What We Know About the Paris Attackers,”:
“Authorities believe that ISIS-linked extremists were behind the brutal attacks that killed 129 people and injured another 352 on Friday night in Paris, and details about the attackers and their possible accomplices are continuing to emerge.”
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It may be simpler to just lump all the attackers together and call them “terrorists,” but if we want to understand them and prevent future violence it’s important to see them as real human beings. As I look at their names and ages, I wonder what their lives were like. How did they reach a point where they gave up the will to live and decided to kill others and die themselves?
Here’s what the NY Magazine writers Chas Danner and Margaret Hartmann say about the men:
Salah Abdeslam: French police say the 26-year-old Belgian-born French national is still at large. His role in the attacks is unclear.
Ibrahim Abdeslam: Investigators say Ibrahim Abdeslam is the suicide bomber who struck the Comptoir Voltaire cafe.
Ismaïl Omar Mostefai: Mostefai, A 29-year-old French national, blew himself up after murdering spectators in the Bataclan concert hall.
Bilal Hadfi: The 20-year-old French national was one of the three suicide bombers who hit the Stade de France.
Samy Amimour: A 28-year-old Frenchman who blew himself up in the Bataclan music hall.
Ahmad Al Mohammad: A Syrian passport with the name Ahmad Al Mohammad was found with one of the suicide bombers at the soccer stadium. The passport belonged to a 25-year old Syrian born in Idlib.
7 & 8. These attackers have yet to be identified.
How do we understand these murder/suicides? An important insight can be gained from Rebecca Costa, a world-renowned and respected social scientist and author of the book, The Watchman’s Rattle: A Radical New Theory of Collapse. In January, 2013 she wrote an article, “Losing the will to live” following the murders in New Town Connecticut. She said:
“Long before the perpetrators reached for a weapon, they lost their desire to live.
That’s right. It doesn’t matter whether we’re talking about Khalid al-Mihdhar and 9/11, or James Eagan Holmes opening fire on movie-goers in Colorado, or more recently, Adam Lanza, the 20-year-old responsible for the school massacre in Newtown, Conn. We now know that in each of these cases, the assailants felt they no longer had a reason to live. And it is this unnatural state that enabled them to commit unimaginable acts. Once a person makes a decision to die, the most abhorrent atrocities become permissible. There are no longer any consequences to fear: no arrest, no jail, no trial, no families of the victims to face, no remorse, no nothing. Dead is dead.”
In December, 2013, I wrote an article, “Remembering the Newtown Killings: We Can Choose Love.” I said, “We need to address the anger growing in the hearts and minds of young males and we need to address the fear in the general population.” I suggested that fear and rage only bring about more fear and rage. Love and understanding are the hope for the future.
We also need to address the increasing levels of depression and suicide that are being experienced by people all over the world, particularly young males. A recent article in the NY Times asked, “Is the World More Depressed?” and concluded that it is. We know the suicide rate for males is much higher than it is for females and young men and older men seem to be at highest risk.
Men’s health expert, Will Courtenay, Ph.D. in his book Dying to Be Men, reports national statistics showing the suicide rate for males between the ages of 15 and 30 is 4 to 5 times higher than it is for females of the same age.
Certainly we need to deal with fanatical elements in the world, including groups like ISIS. My colleague Dr. David Gruder offers an enlightened perspective on how best to do that. But we also have to recognize that, for many, living in our modern world has become a source of pain and despair. In a humorous, but insightful remark, the comedian Elayne Boosler said,
“When women are depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It’s a whole different way of thinking.”
We must all work to keep our joy and hope for the future and help those who feel abused, neglected, and abandoned. We are all in this together and will survive together or not at all.
I look forward to your thoughts and comments. Come visit me at www.MenAlive.com. You can also take the survey on the relationship between irritable male syndrome and male-type depression.
This article originally appeared on MenAlive.com
Photo credit: Getty Images
Thank you for that succinct and accurate description of the current situation, Jed. I agree, it’s ‘compassionate action’ that’s needed, not ‘war’, in order to prevent terrorism of the kind that is happening currently on European soil. It’s been said that there is little we as individuals can do from afar except show our support and solidarity for the people of Paris. However, I think there is much that we can do in our home communities and in our own lives. Firstly, we can all reflect on whether there is anyone towards who we feel hatred, fear or a wish… Read more »
Hi Jed
Here is a documentary about how Daesh brainwash their own children to become dangerous killers and fighters.
http://www.channel4.com/news/syria-children-of-the-caliphate-isis-amputation-evan-williams
Silke, Thanks for sharing the information. There is a lot that Americans are not being made aware of and from what I understand some Europeans are being kept in the dark. I tries to find the video clip I was sent but unable to do so at the moment.
Tom Some countries in Europe seems to have a policy not talk about immigration and refugees problems and conflicts. Sweden is one of them,while Denmark has an open but very brutal debate and Islam is in focus. Norway is somewhere in the middle. Today we got the news that Daesh has killed a Norwegian man they had kidnapped,.The prime minister said they had refused to pay the money they demanded to let him go. And of course we do what we can to stand together, Muslims and non Muslims , immigrant ,refugees and indigenous people . We have to take… Read more »
Silke, I’d never heard of the term “Daesh” until you used it and low and behold I came across an article that was sent to me that explained the word. I was also sent an article that talked about what these nut cases are most afraid of and it’s exactly what you said “muslims and non-muslims” living peacefully together. The nut cases WANT conflict and discourse. Personally, contrary to what the radicals want, I am going on business as usual. Having not been in Europe this past summer, the “cafe” incidents wouldn’t have had much of an impact but spending… Read more »