All parents hold uncertainty. All parents play. Relational capacities like these are already active in millions of homes across the world. When we practice relational capacities in a mindful way, we center our relationships. The choice to center relationships holds a powerful promise: It is what ultimately can get us unstuck in all aspects of life.
As parents, we are always confronted with a choice. Will I perform my role as parent or will I shift sometimes and center being in relationship with my child? We have to be able to do both, but sometimes, the role of parent gets way too much emphasis and the relational connection, too little.
When we choose as parents to shift from the daily responsibilites of our role to being in relationship with our children, we shift from acting on our children to acting with our children. This shift moves our children from being a product of our parenting to them being in relationship with us.
This distinction may seem like a trick of language, but it is in relationship with us that our kids will grow the relationship superpowers they need to succeed. Our goal is not just to achieve the markers of successful parenting, grades, behavior, appearance, manners. The deeper lessons of how to be in relationship with others are first learned with us.
What are we teaching our children? Do we act on others, or do we co-create and co-design with them?
This is the central question of how we can choose to be in our personal and professional lives. The first path can lead to isolation. The second holds the key to connection, collaboration, and innovation, bringing meaning, fulfillment, and joy.
Here’s one of the opening pages of our book, The Relational Book for Parenting.
The Relational Book for Parenting, Part 1: Where Are Our Feelings Created?
The Relational Book for Parenting, Part 2: Labeling Our Emotions
The Relational Book for Parenting, Part 3: Witnessing Our Children’s Difficult Emotions
The Relational Book for Parenting, Part 4: We Live the Stories We Tell
The Relational Book for Parenting, Part 5: Tracking the Powerful Influence of Context
The Relational Book for Parenting, Part 6: Why Is Play The Answer for Businesses and Families Alike?
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Here’s a two minute video on the Relational Book for Parenting. Get a copy of our book at Amazon.com.