If doing your own trial and error testing isn’t appealing, here’s what the studies say women are looking for in a man.
What you’re currently reading is written by a man who is not a prolific womanizer. These words are being typed out by a kid who has just spent the last 30 minutes ogling actresses in their Golden Globe dresses and researching the most seductive color to a woman (hint, red).
The truth is that I don’t like going to bars, meeting new people, or attempting to be a libertine in any capacity. The wishful truth is that I’m hiding behind a bunker of research, lustfully equipping myself with knowledge of the opposite sex until I’m armed with the ability to court any woman I deem fit.
There is no one thing that will make women attracted to you, I’m not selling you a nostrum, I’m selling you truth. Filling in the blank on how to get a woman to like you can’t be reduced to a single word or sentence. Swagger, a beard, and being above average height are all significant, but seduction isn’t a one-size fits all deal. What I’m about to divulge are some tips that science has to offer when asked the question of how to attract a woman.
Before we explore this question know that even science is fallible. What the research shows to be effective may not apply when put to the test at the yoga studio or on you friend’s sister Ashley. Here is a fairly jumbled mix of science-backed tips on attracting women.
The swipe right craze has generated over 9 billion matches and counting. A waning stigma and ubiquitous accessibility has made online dating the most en vogue method of meeting new people. With the limelight on online dating it’s of the upmost importance that we showcase ourselves to the world in the most effective way possible.
OkCupid’s data analyst, Christian Rudder, estimates that 90 percent of the reason we choose to interact with someone online comes down to their photos. Such importance pushed him to figure out which photos are the most attractive to a woman. Rudder found that men were more sexually appealing when their gaze was pointed away from the camera while donning a neutral face. Smiles and eye contact will make you a sure fire left swipe.
In descending order women also found men’s photos most attractive when they were: with an animal — ideally a dog — showing off muscles, or doing something interesting. The allure within the dog pic deals with man’s role as provider. The subconscious or perhaps conscious thought being that if you can care for a pet you can care for a human. Women surveyed from Match.com were twice as likely to concede attraction to the opposite sex than men were simply because they owned a pet.
In Aziz Ansari’s new book, Modern Romance, he travels throughout the country conducting surveys and focus groups in order to find out what women want when it comes to dating. When the topic of texting was broached, females unanimously agreed on several points.
Texting “hey” as an opening text is a no-go. A vapid, generic text means that you’re putting minimal effort into this newly formed relationship. Instead, try tying your text back to something you two previously talked about. Maybe during your conversation at the bar she mentioned how she loves the band Wolf Alice. Knowing this you can construct your first text accordingly: “Can’t get Wolf Alice out of my system, and that’s fine by me.”
Not only are ladies looking for some thoughtfulness in a text, but they also appreciate proper grammar. This may come as a no-brainer but just take a look at your most recent texts, how many are rife with errors? Competent writing is indicative of intelligence and maturity. Do it the right way and lay off the winky faces and gr8 texts.
Aziz also found from his focus groups that women enjoy a bit of humor in their texts, as long as it’s within the realm of common sense. If you’re making sex jokes without knowing the other’s comfort zone, then you’ve probably just been deleted from her phone.
What’s most important to remember about texting is that it’s a step towards the ultimate goal of meeting up with this person. Strengthening a relationship via text is fine up until a certain point. You have seven days to text her after the origin of the conversation. When you finally pop the question, be specific. Mention the activity, time, and place of the proposed date. A simple “Wanna hang out?” will not suffice.
The question of how long to wait to text back will forever plague anyone who conforms to standard perusing practices. Information is so readily accessible that we’ve been conditioned to seek out readily available dopamine releasing stimuli. However, when we have to wait just that little bit longer we feel even more gratified.
The aforementioned is evidenced in ample studies conducted by psychologists finding that ‘reward uncertainty’ has led mice to have a greater rush of dopamine after waiting a little longer to receive food. On the flip side, if the mouse is being given a buffet the amount of dopamine released wanes. So while there is no magic number to abide by, it is safer to delay rather than text prematurely.
Put the Blade Down, or Not
A few years ago a study came out that proclaimed beards as the must have ornament for any single male. It’s thought that beards are an indication of testosterone. The most attractive beard is allegedly the 10-day stubble, the sex appeal lies within the “density and distribution” of the beard. However, men with beards substantially lose their edge if the gene pool is oversaturated by men with beards. If you’re going out in Portland or Brooklyn tonight you might just want to think about picking up that razor and set yourself apart from the crowd with a bit of clean-shaven peacocking.
Red is a dominant color in many areas of life. Whether it’s for sport, restaurants, or sex; red is the most appealing color. I will concede that not all studies have found red to be the most attractive color in regards to sexual appeal, however an overwhelming amount of studies have tipped the scale in red’s favor. The University of Rochester brought the allure of red into the limelight after numerous studies conducted in multiple countries. Researchers concluded that red heightens men’s social status and sex appeal. On the flip side, researchers also found that men are more attracted to women and are more likely to spend money with a woman who dons red.
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