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Sometimes, an influential teacher is found outside the school premises.
“A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops.” Let’s pause for a moment and let the words of Henry Adams get into our system. As a teacher, I’m not in the position to say whether I’ve achieved this, but as a student, I couldn’t agree more.
Interestingly, the most influential are sometimes found outside the four walls of the classroom. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had a lot of great academic teachers, professors, and mentors, and they’ve imprinted my ultimate goal in life and that’s to be like them. However, this teacher who first made a difference in my life wasn’t an academic at all.
Jo-al was a colleague-turned-boss I met almost eight years ago. He returned to the Philippines after spending almost half of his life in New York, and boy am I glad he did. I worked as his secretary when he started his fashion and events business at that time, and with that, he touched my life and turned it upside-down in a good way.
He saw in me something I never did.
It was a great surprise to me when he offered me a job in his startup business. I was back to the job-hunting stage then, but he requested that I work for him. Thinking of the new experiences his job could give me, I said yes. That may not have been my first job but it was definitely the first time someone actually trusted me.
He demonstrated walking an extra mile.
It was my 18th birthday back then. A young woman’s 18th is her debut and it’s usually a big celebration. Unfortunately for me, my dad was ill. My party had to be put off indefinitely because we never knew when he’d get better. When jo-al learned about my situation, he immediately threw a simple yet very memorable party for me. That was one of the few instances when someone walked an extra mile to make me feel appreciated and happy.
That picture of friendship left a mark on my mind and heart, that when I’m reminded of generosity, he’s the first person that pops in my mind. I never expected he would do that. Never did I imagine he would go beyond his way for me. That’s kindness, generosity and genuine friendship.
He taught me to love myself.
“Invest in yourself.” Those are his words that still resonate with me, especially when I’m in doubt.
I got to say I had an awful sense of fashion and he knew that. More like a must, I learned about style, read fashion books and magazines (he brought a lot from New York) and put them into practice.
Makeup, when done right, is an extension of the personality in the form of embellishments. For Jo-al, makeup is an art that’s often conceived as a vanity. While at one point it’s true, but it can’t be denied that cosmetics enhance beauty and confidence, so we chose to see makeup on a positive note.
Sure many would say this is entirely unnecessary, but for Jo-al and for many women, dressing up and putting on makeup to look and feel good is a manifestation of self-love. It’s a means of self-expression.
He urged me to be who I want to be.
Jo-al is fabulously assertive. He knows what he can do, what he’s doing and is sure that he can deliver. Being young back then, I was often scolded for not being confident enough. I didn’t see the point of being bold, but he did tell me that if I want to survive and succeed, I could only trust myself. Thus, there’s no point in holding back when I know for sure that I can do it and do it excellently. If I don’t start trusting myself, he said, no one will. Only then did I appreciate his patience and impatience. All I’ve learned from him ultimately molded a positive mental attitude in me towards myself and any situation I’m in.
Years passed since we parted ways after several months of working together. He moved to Manila while I stayed to continue my studies. Fate has been so good for the both of us. He’s now running his dream couture house and is becoming a go-to designer of the stars. As for me, currently pursuing a Master’s degree and there’s no stopping me from getting myself a professorship. I’ve got a lot of amazing mentors along the way, but never will I ever forget the one who started it all.
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Photo credit: Jo-al’s Facebook
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