“Rest nurtures creativity, which nurtures activity. Activity nurtures rest, which sustains creativity. Each draws from and contributes to the other.”
― Kim John Payne
I write this outside on my lanai as my two boys play outside in a soap-filled kiddie pool. My 2-year-old jumps out, grabs a frisbee, and starts throwing it to himself. My 5-year-old finds a bucket and begins pouring water on his head.
They’re happy.
Eight months into this pandemic, this is a typical afternoon.
I used to overcomplicate things (still do sometimes). When all this craziness started, I went all out with schedules and curriculums. We had puzzle time at 3 and attended virtual field trips daily. I made more crafts than Martha Stewart.
But along with most parents, most individuals right now, I’m facing what researchers call decision fatigue. Don’t know what I’m talking about?
The title of this USA Today article says it all: “You’re facing a lot of choices amid the pandemic. Cut yourself slack: It’s called decision fatigue.”
After reading that article, the words “cut yourself some slack” left an imprint in my soul. So, that’s what I did.
These days, I crave simplicity; I’ve cut down my list to 3 words that inspire what I do with my children every day. And not only am I more relaxed, but my kids are, too.
3 Words That Inspire What I Do with My Kids Everyday
1. Outside
“Our challenge isn’t so much to teach children about the natural world, but to find ways to sustain the instinctive connections they already carry.” ~ Terry Krautwurst
I began this article by talking about my kiddos frolicking outside, so let’s start there. I aim to get my kids outside every day. Some days they swim in the kiddie pool, other days they play in the sandpit, many days we go for a walk.
This all, of course, counts — our favorite outdoor pastime: “hiking” in the wooded area behind our house. Harvard blog contributor Claire McCarthy, MD, states that going outside provides kids with vitamin D, executive functioning, socialization, and more. An added perk to know while my sons roll around in the dirt.
I rarely plan outside activities because they seem to just fall into place. We do many outdoor activities on a whim, like building sand volcanoes and filling them with leftover vinegar and baking soda or soap kiddie pool baths.
2. Create
“One thing I had learned from watching chimpanzees with their infants is that having a child should be fun.” –Jane Goodall
Create is another open-ended word that inspires my day. This verb can be as straightforward as coloring or as elaborate as building a “three-story” sandcastle. These days, I go with simple (throwing paints on the table works wonders).
I’m also known for gathering random supplies and letting the boys go at ’em. Due to this freedom, my sons have come up with some MOMA-worthy sculptures like the infamous….robot cookie.
There’s an art in creating, and as Michigan State University explains, creating improves cognitive functioning, math, fine motor skills, and language skills.
(Creating something with my kids lets out my inner Picasso as well.)
3. Learn
“Children are educated by what the grown-up is and not by his talk.” –Carl Jung
I used to get hung up on educational specifics and subjects: phonics, guided reading, counting, science, social studies, language arts, math…..
As a previous teacher, I lose myself in that rabbit hole. But my kids are 2 and 5, so learning through play is my go-to right now.
Some days learning means counting to 50 together on the rowing machine. Other days it’s attending a virtual field trip to the zoo, and other times it’s calculating how much more allowance we need to buy a green Spiderman suit (believe me, they exist).
It helps to know self-directed learning has been shown to improve collaboration and support interests in kids. – I’ll take it!
I’ll add here that we make a solid effort to read every day, which I don’t include as a separate word but lump into learning.
I pat myself on the back after teaching my kids anything. It’s an accomplishment — even if it’s as small as singing the ABCs together or learning that car starts with the letter c.
The bottom line
Parents all have their own ways of coping right now, and there isn’t one right answer. But what’s helped me get through the pandemic is relaxing and going with the flow more than usual. I am cutting myself some slack because I’ve accepted this lifestyle isn’t a sprint — it’s a marathon.
In regards to my sons, basing my children-filled days around three easy to remember words works for me. Perhaps one (or all three) will help you out too. Regardless, I hope you find ways to cut yourself some slack and give yourself the grace you deserve. Good luck!
“Relationships are forged in pauses”
― Lisa M. Ross
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This post was previously published on Medium.
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Photo by Robert Collins on Unsplash