The best kinds of relationships are the ones that make us better not only when we are together, but also when we are separated.
We have been taught by fairytales and Nicholas Sparks films to associate the term “soul mate” with one person we are destined to meet by the work of fate. From there, we fall madly in love and upkeep this romantic love forever. But, that is not what a true soul mate is.
This mentality that a soul mate is one person with whom you are destined to meet and fall in love is, for lack of a better term, bullsh*t. No, this is not about to be a cynical rant about how there is no such thing as soul mates.
This is a chance to redefine soul mates. It is an opportunity to spark hope for those who believe they will never be able to find the one soul in a sea of 7 billion; to open our eyes and realize we are not limited to one soul mate.
A soul mate is any person who mirrors us in some way. That is why we are so drawn to these different people; they are separate entities, but something about them reminds us of ourselves.
Our soul mates have a different part of us instilled in them. We should not search for our “other half” because that sounds way too close to human cloning. But our other tenth? Twentieth? Hundredth? Those are much more settling ratios of how our souls are distributed among others.
These various soul mates provide us with different purposes, outlooks and emotions. However, each and every soul mate has similar attributes that makes him or her worthy of such a special role in our lives.
The essence of ourselves that we see in our soul mates allows us to feel in-tune with them, similar to how we are in touch with ourselves. They are an extension of our hearts, our minds and (you guessed it!) our souls.
The bond shared with each soul mate is truly exceptional. Humans are the most complex beings, and each soul mate complements a different aspect of us. We find comfort in having someone who can understand and relate to us.
When speaking to this extension of ourselves, we can still see and appreciate their beautiful, distinguished and unique traits. If we are going through a tough time, our soul mates can empathize as if it is their own issue, and also address it as a third party. Long story short: They just get us.
We all have a passion, or something that gives us purpose. When you find a soul mate who shares the same deep love for something, he or she challenges you, betters you and inspires you. You go the distance together, and it is a journey like no other.
A musical soul mate, for instance, does not simply enjoy the same music as his or her counterpart. Instead, he or she has the same thirst for comprehending the lyrics, dissecting the melody and discovering the meaning of the silence between the sounds. Together, musical soul mates have countless opportunities to explore music and discuss separate interpretations.
Long story short, the love shared between soulmates is one of the strongest, most wonderful kinds of love we will ever experience because it is a love that is bigger than ourselves.
Months, years, miles and oceans can put distance between you and your soul mate, but that distance is merely physical. The minute you are reunited, it will be like picking up where you last left off.
In the case of soul mates, absence does really make the heart grow fonder because, without them, a little part of us is missing. It does not matter they have been in our lives for 10 days or 10 years; the moment we discover a soul mate, it is like he or she has been a part of our lives since day one.
There are no secrets; there are no inhibitions; there are no facades. Soul mates are the people who have seen us at our best, but loved us most when we were at our worst.
Our soul mates enrich our lives, but we also enhance theirs. It all goes back to the fact that our soul mates are extensions of ourselves. We learn from their mistakes the way we learn from our own.
Soul mates rely on each other to grow as individuals, which is ironic, but incredible. The best kinds of relationships are the ones that make us better not only when we are together, but also when we are separated.
Different soulmates will teach us different lessons, but they all have one lesson in common: Each soulmate teaches us to care about somebody other than ourselves. Soul mates prepare us for our future loves: spouses, children, grandchildren and so on.
Our soul mates are more than the loves of our lives; they are our guiding lights.
This post originally appeared at Elite Daily. Reprinted with permission.
Cashie (Cash like Johnny, not like the pretentiously named cereal) is a 19 year old who calls herself a “20-something” to sound more mature. She’s been writing since she was a child; In fact, she wrote an autobiography in the 5th grade that predicted she would be a WNBA star. This dream was crushed only a year later when she hit puberty and lost all athletic ability. Instead of shooting hoops, she is a student at Indiana University who is studying journalism and psychology by day and frat boys by night.
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